Take a Break this weekend - Weekenders 04 - 07 March 2022
Magsie
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,683
Take a Break this weekend - Weekenders 04 - 07 March 2022
Take a Break this weekend - Weekenders 04 - 07 March 2022
Welcome to the Weekenders
Taking a break from alcohol this weekend.
If you’re here and reading this you’re probably like us, alcohol causing problems in your life, and may have even took over your life! I know it took over my life for many years until I broke free.
If so, perhaps you’d like to have a break from alcohol? Break free of its chains.
Take away all the stress and hangovers, the blackouts and anxieties.
Not drinking alcohol gives us a chance to live without the guilt of what we did, said and behaved.
Also, it clears our mind to get on with life. There is life after alcohol!
If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!)
Welcome to the Weekenders
Taking a break from alcohol this weekend.
If you’re here and reading this you’re probably like us, alcohol causing problems in your life, and may have even took over your life! I know it took over my life for many years until I broke free.
If so, perhaps you’d like to have a break from alcohol? Break free of its chains.
Take away all the stress and hangovers, the blackouts and anxieties.
Not drinking alcohol gives us a chance to live without the guilt of what we did, said and behaved.
Also, it clears our mind to get on with life. There is life after alcohol!
If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!)
congratulations on shotgun 
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,338
Weekends, holidays, didn’t matter. Everyday was Wineday. E V ER Y DAY……. It was bad. That was then.
I’m so glad every day I make choices in self love. Haven’t felt this good in YEARS! This is NOW.
Wherever you are on this path, please come say hello. We are here from all over the globe. A great family of choice.
I’m so glad every day I make choices in self love. Haven’t felt this good in YEARS! This is NOW.
Wherever you are on this path, please come say hello. We are here from all over the globe. A great family of choice.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,338
I came across an old post of mine instigated by an OP you did a while back, Mags.
in the hopes it might help someone, here it is :
Good morning!
One fact I think might be confusing for those of us who don’t have long term sobriety (thinking 1000 days plus), is that the recipe for successful (contented) sobriety contains either many ingredients, or only one. And as many of us that are out there, the recipe is different, and no one has the answer for us individually. That’s a difficult recipe to follow, but we know for a fact also, that many many people succeed.
Heres mine:
Drink often and in enough quantities to get addicted to alcohol
Feel deep shame and make bad decisions because of the addiction
Realize something needs to change, let these things set and get rotten.
Try different things in your life to change after identifying things that are at fault. (Residential location, job, family member(s), exercise, eating habits). Be careful to guard that relationship with alcohol, it can’t be THAT 🧐…..
Realize you are still miserable. Perhaps you wonder if you have a ‘problem’.
Google alcohol use disorders.
Google what is NORMAL drinking
Realize alcohol is POISON.
Realize the ridiculousness of the marketing slogan “DRINK RESPONSIBILITY” (Its akin to ‘shoot up responsibly’)
Realize you are killing yourself, and hurting others you love
Realize you are addicted
Try to moderate
Fail
Try to moderate
Fail
Try to moderate
Fail
Get some long stretches of sobriety.
White knuckle it.
Try some ingredients in the recipe that have worked for others, they just might work for you
Ex. AVRT
SMART
AA
SR
THERAPY
DETOX
IOP
DBT
CBT
Avoid all alcohol situation (forever or initially)
Practice saying ‘no thanks’
Do things for you as if you care about yourself. A lot.
Be grateful
Maybe fail. Maybe succeed.
Try the recipe again.
Forgive yourself.
Be grateful
Give of yourself to others (yes, you DO have something to offer) that is, service to others.
love yourself.
be grateful
Try recipe again, mix, match, omit some ingredients again.
Never stop the quest for the correct ingredients for you.
be grateful
Listen to the wise ones after you find them. Listen……..
Listen to your soul, feel the response from the universe.
Your soul is pleased, the universe is pleased, your loved ones are pleased.
Its a win-win.
Never stop trying the recipe, adapt as life chapters change.
be grateful
Give up the ingredients that don’t belong in the recipe. (Your poison of choice HAS TO GO).
😍
in the hopes it might help someone, here it is :
Good morning!
One fact I think might be confusing for those of us who don’t have long term sobriety (thinking 1000 days plus), is that the recipe for successful (contented) sobriety contains either many ingredients, or only one. And as many of us that are out there, the recipe is different, and no one has the answer for us individually. That’s a difficult recipe to follow, but we know for a fact also, that many many people succeed.
Heres mine:
Drink often and in enough quantities to get addicted to alcohol
Feel deep shame and make bad decisions because of the addiction
Realize something needs to change, let these things set and get rotten.
Try different things in your life to change after identifying things that are at fault. (Residential location, job, family member(s), exercise, eating habits). Be careful to guard that relationship with alcohol, it can’t be THAT 🧐…..
Realize you are still miserable. Perhaps you wonder if you have a ‘problem’.
Google alcohol use disorders.
Google what is NORMAL drinking
Realize alcohol is POISON.
Realize the ridiculousness of the marketing slogan “DRINK RESPONSIBILITY” (Its akin to ‘shoot up responsibly’)
Realize you are killing yourself, and hurting others you love
Realize you are addicted
Try to moderate
Fail
Try to moderate
Fail
Try to moderate
Fail
Get some long stretches of sobriety.
White knuckle it.
Try some ingredients in the recipe that have worked for others, they just might work for you
Ex. AVRT
SMART
AA
SR
THERAPY
DETOX
IOP
DBT
CBT
Avoid all alcohol situation (forever or initially)
Practice saying ‘no thanks’
Do things for you as if you care about yourself. A lot.
Be grateful
Maybe fail. Maybe succeed.
Try the recipe again.
Forgive yourself.
Be grateful
Give of yourself to others (yes, you DO have something to offer) that is, service to others.
love yourself.
be grateful
Try recipe again, mix, match, omit some ingredients again.
Never stop the quest for the correct ingredients for you.
be grateful
Listen to the wise ones after you find them. Listen……..
Listen to your soul, feel the response from the universe.
Your soul is pleased, the universe is pleased, your loved ones are pleased.
Its a win-win.
Never stop trying the recipe, adapt as life chapters change.
be grateful
Give up the ingredients that don’t belong in the recipe. (Your poison of choice HAS TO GO).
😍
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Just about to hit the sack but want to stop in to see what's up this weekend. Yeah, I took a permanent break from alcohol and my life has never been better.
I still have some of the same problems, and some new ones, but I don't have the biggest problem of all - drinking! So I can handle the problems that come my way clear headed and alert.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,060
Thanks Mags.
Sorry about your car Manta, what a nuisance, it like dodgems on the roads these days. I hope you received a treatment plan from the hospital and that things are a little clearer now.
My recipe is don't drink no matter what.
Sorry about your car Manta, what a nuisance, it like dodgems on the roads these days. I hope you received a treatment plan from the hospital and that things are a little clearer now.
My recipe is don't drink no matter what.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,425
Free, good post. I could add in about another thousand "try to moderate - fail".
Manta, I think that being supportive in a meaningful way just comes very difficult for most people, including those closest to us. Until I found SR, I didn't know the type of support given here existed.
Kaily, I totally agree. There are many people on the road now that seem to have a suicide wish or something.
Manta, I think that being supportive in a meaningful way just comes very difficult for most people, including those closest to us. Until I found SR, I didn't know the type of support given here existed.
Kaily, I totally agree. There are many people on the road now that seem to have a suicide wish or something.
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,809
I'm in! Thanks, Mags.
Sorry about your car, Manta, and I'm glad you were not hurt. I can understand completely why you're feeling a bit overwhelmed. Just try to remember that some of this is out of your control, focus on the very few things you CAN control. For example, you can control whether or not you drink. And you can control getting your insurance company to help you get a rental car until you can be compensated for the accident and get a car of your own. ((((Manta))))
I am in the middle of some drama with an old friend of mine who can't stay sober. He manages a few months at a time (I think he had over a year at one point) but he has not found the right formula yet. He started calling me on Saturday, over and over again, always when I could not answer the phone for various reasons. Mind you, I've barely spoken to him in a couple of years, and last time I did, he was drunk. I finally called him back, Tuesday, after he had called my phone 9 times while I was at work. I had texted him that I could not talk to him while I was working, but he was so drunk he was not understanding that. Anyway, I spoke to him for at least a half hour, and finally rang off because he was barely making sense and I realized it was pointless. He then kept calling me into the evening, for a total of 8 more times, and the one voice mail he finally left (I was not answering, and I had texted him to stop calling) made it clear he didn't remember even talking to me. I blocked him, finally. Unblocked him and texted him yesterday afternoon that I was not going to talk to him anymore when he is drunk, that I'm willing to help, but it's pointless for me to keep having conversations with him when he's drunk, and that I'd block him again if needed. He immediately tried to call me, and left an obviously drunk voicemail. Texted him back and said I'd talk to him some other time. Then a few hours later, he called again, and then also texted that he's in the hospital. It's the right place for him. I texted him this morning that I sincerely hope this is the wakeup call that finally gets through to him. I'll try to call him a little later. He's a friend from way back, we used to work together in the 90's, and we drank together on many occasions. We have not been in touch all that much over the years, just now and again. I'm thinking he has burned a lot of bridges with other people in his life (I know his son wants nothing to do with him when he's drinking) and he figures I'm still willing to listen and help because he hasn't burned me out just yet. And I am wiling to help, but only if he respects my boundaries and demonstrates that he's willing to work damn hard at sobriety. This whole thing is a potent reminder to me that I could easily end up right where he is if I go back to drinking. A gift from the universe to me, really. It's sad, and I feel really bad for him, but I don't really know what else I can say to him at this point that I have not already said over the years. He needs to find his reason for saving his own life.
Sorry about your car, Manta, and I'm glad you were not hurt. I can understand completely why you're feeling a bit overwhelmed. Just try to remember that some of this is out of your control, focus on the very few things you CAN control. For example, you can control whether or not you drink. And you can control getting your insurance company to help you get a rental car until you can be compensated for the accident and get a car of your own. ((((Manta))))
I am in the middle of some drama with an old friend of mine who can't stay sober. He manages a few months at a time (I think he had over a year at one point) but he has not found the right formula yet. He started calling me on Saturday, over and over again, always when I could not answer the phone for various reasons. Mind you, I've barely spoken to him in a couple of years, and last time I did, he was drunk. I finally called him back, Tuesday, after he had called my phone 9 times while I was at work. I had texted him that I could not talk to him while I was working, but he was so drunk he was not understanding that. Anyway, I spoke to him for at least a half hour, and finally rang off because he was barely making sense and I realized it was pointless. He then kept calling me into the evening, for a total of 8 more times, and the one voice mail he finally left (I was not answering, and I had texted him to stop calling) made it clear he didn't remember even talking to me. I blocked him, finally. Unblocked him and texted him yesterday afternoon that I was not going to talk to him anymore when he is drunk, that I'm willing to help, but it's pointless for me to keep having conversations with him when he's drunk, and that I'd block him again if needed. He immediately tried to call me, and left an obviously drunk voicemail. Texted him back and said I'd talk to him some other time. Then a few hours later, he called again, and then also texted that he's in the hospital. It's the right place for him. I texted him this morning that I sincerely hope this is the wakeup call that finally gets through to him. I'll try to call him a little later. He's a friend from way back, we used to work together in the 90's, and we drank together on many occasions. We have not been in touch all that much over the years, just now and again. I'm thinking he has burned a lot of bridges with other people in his life (I know his son wants nothing to do with him when he's drinking) and he figures I'm still willing to listen and help because he hasn't burned me out just yet. And I am wiling to help, but only if he respects my boundaries and demonstrates that he's willing to work damn hard at sobriety. This whole thing is a potent reminder to me that I could easily end up right where he is if I go back to drinking. A gift from the universe to me, really. It's sad, and I feel really bad for him, but I don't really know what else I can say to him at this point that I have not already said over the years. He needs to find his reason for saving his own life.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,425
MLD, that was tough to read. Reminds me of when I mostly avoided talking on the phone after about 4:00 because I was probably drinking by that time, and the stupid things I would put on social media and dread seeing the next morning. Also reminds me of a similar friend I could finally take no longer and severed communications with for similar reasons long after most others had already given up on him.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,338
Manta, I’m sorry about your car. You taught me a new saying/phrase though.
My prayers continue for you, your peace, and now your ability to travel to get your needed care.
❤️🤓🙏🏼
My prayers continue for you, your peace, and now your ability to travel to get your needed care.
❤️🤓🙏🏼
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,203
In for another weekend.
Sorry about your car MantaLady but I'm glad your appointment went OK.
BTW way "written off" comes from the insurance industry. A "write off" is anything that would cost as much or more to repair than it would to replace.
No colourful intro this week, I was informed my dad died in the early hours of this morning, he was 84. We were not close so there is no mourning as such but some emptiness that we had such a poor relationship. He had not seen my daughters or my sister/bil's children for over a decade.
Sorry about your car MantaLady but I'm glad your appointment went OK.
BTW way "written off" comes from the insurance industry. A "write off" is anything that would cost as much or more to repair than it would to replace.
No colourful intro this week, I was informed my dad died in the early hours of this morning, he was 84. We were not close so there is no mourning as such but some emptiness that we had such a poor relationship. He had not seen my daughters or my sister/bil's children for over a decade.
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