Ten Years on...
Ten Years on...
In a little over a month, it will be ten years since I've found it necessary to take a drink of alcohol or smoke a cigarette. I don't often think about my drinking these days. Seems so remote. Yet SR was fundamental in my FIRST attempt at recovery (~14 yrs ago, I think). I spent a lot of time here. Got confident, questioned my alcoholism; it didn't end well. But this place gave me a place of refuge during the two years I remained sober.
Since then I have been a sporadic guest. When one is sober, truly sober, life becomes very full. Even in retirement. I've mentored (I won't say "sponsored," as it implies a much more hands-on relationship) a number of folks. I continue to attend AA for the wannabe's. It is so rewarding to witness the transformation, the birthing of a fully human being.
I write this for the wannabe. Don't settle for just sober. Go for the whole enchilada, or you'll simply be an angry, bitter, and depressed non-drinker. Sobriety means fulfilling your purpose and your promise. A purpose you may have no clue exists yet. Just as we built a life upon habits of suffering, loss, and grief, we can create habits of gratitude, joy, and peace. We learn to be happy with what is granted us. We don't expect life to be free of challenge and suffering, we simply learn to meet it. This is the meaning of serenity.
Do not compare yourself with others. Just be you. Do not believe it when your sick ego tells you that you're not enough. We all have our own causes, conditions, gifts, and liabilities. I remember wanting five years' sobriety in my first 6 months. Yet the miracle occurred within every day of the five years that followed. Those days are part of me. The one trait I observe in most who recover successfully is peace with the way things are, right now. Doesn't mean you don't work toward better circumstances, it simply means that right now is OK. I can accept it. I can be with the way things are. Because no matter what you are lacking in your life, you have your sobriety. You are fully present to meet it. That gives you all the advantages to which you are entitled.
You're enough. Just the way you are. And you're even better if you don't drink. Drinking - it never ends well. It really doesn't. We don't manage it, it manages us. It's simple as that.
Joy,
Warren
Since then I have been a sporadic guest. When one is sober, truly sober, life becomes very full. Even in retirement. I've mentored (I won't say "sponsored," as it implies a much more hands-on relationship) a number of folks. I continue to attend AA for the wannabe's. It is so rewarding to witness the transformation, the birthing of a fully human being.
I write this for the wannabe. Don't settle for just sober. Go for the whole enchilada, or you'll simply be an angry, bitter, and depressed non-drinker. Sobriety means fulfilling your purpose and your promise. A purpose you may have no clue exists yet. Just as we built a life upon habits of suffering, loss, and grief, we can create habits of gratitude, joy, and peace. We learn to be happy with what is granted us. We don't expect life to be free of challenge and suffering, we simply learn to meet it. This is the meaning of serenity.
Do not compare yourself with others. Just be you. Do not believe it when your sick ego tells you that you're not enough. We all have our own causes, conditions, gifts, and liabilities. I remember wanting five years' sobriety in my first 6 months. Yet the miracle occurred within every day of the five years that followed. Those days are part of me. The one trait I observe in most who recover successfully is peace with the way things are, right now. Doesn't mean you don't work toward better circumstances, it simply means that right now is OK. I can accept it. I can be with the way things are. Because no matter what you are lacking in your life, you have your sobriety. You are fully present to meet it. That gives you all the advantages to which you are entitled.
You're enough. Just the way you are. And you're even better if you don't drink. Drinking - it never ends well. It really doesn't. We don't manage it, it manages us. It's simple as that.
Joy,
Warren
What a beautifully written post, Warren. I'm so happy you are living a wonderful life - one that wouldn't have been possible if you'd continued anesthetizing.
It's so strange how we think it's enhancing our lives - even as it cheats us out of everything good & steals our spirit.
Congratulations on your 10 yrs.! (Wish you'd drop in more often.)
It's so strange how we think it's enhancing our lives - even as it cheats us out of everything good & steals our spirit.
Congratulations on your 10 yrs.! (Wish you'd drop in more often.)
In a little over a month, it will be ten years since I've found it necessary to take a drink of alcohol or smoke a cigarette. I don't often think about my drinking these days. Seems so remote. Yet SR was fundamental in my FIRST attempt at recovery (~14 yrs ago, I think).
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Do not compare yourself with others. Just be you. Do not believe it when your sick ego tells you that you're not enough. We all have our own causes, conditions, gifts, and liabilities. I remember wanting five years' sobriety in my first 6 months. Yet the miracle occurred within every day of the five years that followed. Those days are part of me. The one trait I observe in most who recover successfully is peace with the way things are, right now. Doesn't mean you don't work toward better circumstances, it simply means that right now is OK. I can accept it. I can be with the way things are.
That's awesome, @warrens! Ten Years is EPIC!
It's great to see you post here! I often wonder about the folks that disappear. I'm sure that some of them get enough sober time and get strong enough in sobriety that they don't "need" SR anymore. Probably I fall in that category for the most part. But I stick around to remind myself of what will happen if I go back out there, and to help and encourage those that may be struggling with it. I like to give back to the forum that helped me to save my life.
Again, Congrats!
It's great to see you post here! I often wonder about the folks that disappear. I'm sure that some of them get enough sober time and get strong enough in sobriety that they don't "need" SR anymore. Probably I fall in that category for the most part. But I stick around to remind myself of what will happen if I go back out there, and to help and encourage those that may be struggling with it. I like to give back to the forum that helped me to save my life.
Again, Congrats!
Congratulations on approaching a decade of sobriety!
I'm also retired and approaching 12 years of sobriety this spring.
Years ago I worried that when I retired I would have lots of time on my hands and no accountability to an employer, so I would be drunk all the time. That hasn't happened, I'm way to busy enjoying my life to even think about drinking. Sounds like you are too!
I'm also retired and approaching 12 years of sobriety this spring.
Years ago I worried that when I retired I would have lots of time on my hands and no accountability to an employer, so I would be drunk all the time. That hasn't happened, I'm way to busy enjoying my life to even think about drinking. Sounds like you are too!
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