How to celebrate
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2022
Location: Merseyside
Posts: 17
How to celebrate
Hi I’ve only been sober for a week. Stopped last Sunday, but Friday night came and it was like WTF what do I do to give myself a pat on the back, I’d normally just got wasted but it felt like a kinda empty experience. Any suggestions on how to celebrate your sober landmarks? Thx
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,498
Yes, it does take a shift in thinking.
I think it's good to recognize that you are taking care of yourself and that's a gift you're giving to yourself. My treats in early recovery were usually a new book, some good coffee, small things like that.
I think it's good to recognize that you are taking care of yourself and that's a gift you're giving to yourself. My treats in early recovery were usually a new book, some good coffee, small things like that.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,432
I didn't ever think I'd be able to celebrate or express joy again without drinking - but I did, and you will too Smegasaurus.
Give yourself a little time to make up new ways to handle things.
I worked out that there is joy, and a sense of accomplishment, that doesn't need alcohol added to it.
D
Give yourself a little time to make up new ways to handle things.
I worked out that there is joy, and a sense of accomplishment, that doesn't need alcohol added to it.
D
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
I celebrate my sobriety just by taking delight in the everyday things I can do now that I'm sober. 
I get great joy in taking good care of my dog and two cats and myself. Before my back started hurting so badly, I used to celebrate by taking my dog for a walk. Mostly I celebrate internally, just by feeling good inside.
I get great joy in taking good care of my dog and two cats and myself. Before my back started hurting so badly, I used to celebrate by taking my dog for a walk. Mostly I celebrate internally, just by feeling good inside. Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
I copied my wife and kid. They didn't drink and they didn't care about drinking.
So Friday nights and other significant events were treated with things like staying up a little later, eating a special meal, going to an event or show etc etc. Basically I had to learn what sober people do. Basically, they fiddle faddle with projects, movies, chores.
Waking up sober is the best. It has taken all this time for my sleep to normalize a bit. Well over 6 years of sobriety. I am still searching for a routine 6 to 8 hours of sleep a night with no wake up. It is elusive.
It takes a long time to get used to what is left of our brains. The addiction is fierce and will do anything to get the fix. Good, bad, who cares. It will crave.
Suffering and time. Keep reading and posting.
Exercise and sweets help.
Thanks.
So Friday nights and other significant events were treated with things like staying up a little later, eating a special meal, going to an event or show etc etc. Basically I had to learn what sober people do. Basically, they fiddle faddle with projects, movies, chores.
Waking up sober is the best. It has taken all this time for my sleep to normalize a bit. Well over 6 years of sobriety. I am still searching for a routine 6 to 8 hours of sleep a night with no wake up. It is elusive.
It takes a long time to get used to what is left of our brains. The addiction is fierce and will do anything to get the fix. Good, bad, who cares. It will crave.
Suffering and time. Keep reading and posting.
Exercise and sweets help.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 2,909
Originally Posted by nez 
I give myself a pat on the back by saying "WOW, you are actually doing it. How cool is that!!! i am proud of you. To infinity and beyond!." 
Then I just smile and bask in the warmth of my accomplishment.
Then I just smile and bask in the warmth of my accomplishment.bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
A lot of small victories I celebrate by holding Billie in my lap and petting her. Tummy rubs too. She's in doggie heaven and my heart overflows with joy to know that I am making her so happy. I like to celebrate my joy by making Billie's day.
Tummy rubs too. She's in doggie heaven and my heart overflows with joy to know that I am making her so happy. I like to celebrate my joy by making Billie's day. Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,940
I’m having a few days away, and yesterday morning stopped off for a coffee in a well-known pub chain (any brits reading will know the name). I only go there because the coffee’s cheaper with endless refills. It was 11am and not only were the other customers drinking beers, they were all complaining of hangovers. They looked awful. If you want a reward, go to one of those places after a few days sober and look around. Those days are thankfully long gone and I don’t miss them one bit.
Why not start an activity which takes place on Saturday morning. That’ll be something to really look forward to instead of that Friday night routine.
Why not start an activity which takes place on Saturday morning. That’ll be something to really look forward to instead of that Friday night routine.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2020
Posts: 234
when I got past my 60 day mark, I went shopping for some new clothes. I hate shopping with a passion, but I enjoyed it this time because I could see the progress I had been making. Seeing me fit into the clothes gave me the motivation to keep on doing what I'm doing.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by Smegasaur
Any suggestions on how to celebrate your sober landmarks? Thx
Actually, as recovering alcoholics who are used to "celebrating" everything with a drink, we need to rethink the whole idea of celebration. Not everything requires celebration. You are a week sober. That's awesome. Take pride in your achievement. But you don't need a parade. You have many sober milestones ahead of you--hopefully. You will know which ones rank a reward.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
My AA group had what they called birthday Friday on the last Friday of the month, where we had cake and coffee, and anyone who had a sobriety birthday that month was awarded their chip, usually by a close friend or sponsor, who would say a few words before handing out the chip, and then there would be all kinds of congratulations and pats on the back and cake and more coffee. It was the celebration of milestones, and it was fun and special. I always looked forward to it.
But I'm with Carl on this one. My sobriety even at two weeks into recovery, was and always has been a quiet private inner celebration of joy and gratitude. While Birthday Friday at AA was one of the month's highlights, my inner celebration was continuous and much more profound. Maybe even a bit more profound on any Friday night when ordinarily I would be getting plastered in some bar.
If an official celebration with the metaphorical confetti and noise makers actually contributes to strengthening one's resolve, I can't say, but if it does for you, I'd say go for it. On a side note, celebration is often accompanied by having a drink, and I believe many an alcoholic has relapsed by celebrating a month's hard won sobriety that way. That's not recovery. That's just alcoholism.
One guy I knew did talk about rewarding his sobriety by going out once a week and having a good steak dinner. This may have been a metaphorical celebration but he always referred to it as a "reward," which seems like a better way to mark an ongoing success. There's a lot of semantics in the concept of celebration. For me, it carries the connotation of boisterous letting go, pulling out the stops, and yes, raising a glass of something or other to the cheers of others, so I don't gravitate to it naturally as something to do in sobriety. But I do something privately in my head, and in a way that is much more profound. Although it's more like a deep feeling of gratitude.
But I'm with Carl on this one. My sobriety even at two weeks into recovery, was and always has been a quiet private inner celebration of joy and gratitude. While Birthday Friday at AA was one of the month's highlights, my inner celebration was continuous and much more profound. Maybe even a bit more profound on any Friday night when ordinarily I would be getting plastered in some bar.
If an official celebration with the metaphorical confetti and noise makers actually contributes to strengthening one's resolve, I can't say, but if it does for you, I'd say go for it. On a side note, celebration is often accompanied by having a drink, and I believe many an alcoholic has relapsed by celebrating a month's hard won sobriety that way. That's not recovery. That's just alcoholism.
One guy I knew did talk about rewarding his sobriety by going out once a week and having a good steak dinner. This may have been a metaphorical celebration but he always referred to it as a "reward," which seems like a better way to mark an ongoing success. There's a lot of semantics in the concept of celebration. For me, it carries the connotation of boisterous letting go, pulling out the stops, and yes, raising a glass of something or other to the cheers of others, so I don't gravitate to it naturally as something to do in sobriety. But I do something privately in my head, and in a way that is much more profound. Although it's more like a deep feeling of gratitude.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
When I came in to alcohol sobriety I was already in recovery for binge eating so I had to find ways other than food to celebrate and release pent up emotion. That was a challenge for me. Challenge accepted!
I found that a long walk in nature checked all the boxes. Felt good, was spiritual and quiet. I was doing something very good for my physical body and I was quieting my busy mind. I've used long walks as soothing balm ever since.
I found that a long walk in nature checked all the boxes. Felt good, was spiritual and quiet. I was doing something very good for my physical body and I was quieting my busy mind. I've used long walks as soothing balm ever since.
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