jryan19982

I'm struggling.

We had to put down our dog of almost 14 years a few days ago and I feel like crap about it. He had a very large fast growing tumor in this abdomen but he was still him.. it was the toughest decision because he could still walk, and seemed content but he wasnt quite hinself. I think he maybe was hiding his pain etc but I just feel awful about it.

I have thoughts that drinking will help numb the pain and make it better so that I can cope in what is supposed to be a happy time of year.

I've been trying to stay strong for the family but inside I'm falling apart. I need some help guys.

Anna

I'm so sorry about the loss of your beloved pet. You did the right thing, as hard as it was to do, knowing that you helped prevent your dog from living in pain.

Nonsensical

Hugs, Brother.
I had to put down my best friend about 7 years ago. My beautiful Jessie had a tumor in her hip. I let it go until I couldn't stand to see her hobble any longer. I probably let her suffer longer than I should have.
Had her cremated. The day I picked up her ashes I drove straight to the liquor store and went on a 3-day bender.
It didn't help.
I wish I would have been the man she always knew I could be. That she always thought I was.
I have lost two more dogs since then. I have honored their memories better than I honored Jessie's.
Honor your friend with sobriety. You'll feel so much better that you did.

suki44883

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious pet. I had to do the same a couple of months ago when my beloved Suki had a seizure at the age of 14. I was beside myself with grief as I'm sure you are. I agree it is one of the hardest things we ever have to do, but we do it because we love them so much and don't want them to suffer.

I understand the thoughts of drinking to ease our pain for a little while, but it really isn't worth it. It won't change anything and the pain will still be there afterward. Honor your precious pet's memory by continuing to take care of yourself. It's so painful right now, and will be for a while, but in time, the memories of the love you gave each other will be a comfort to you. (((HUGS)))

least

You did the right thing for your dog, as much as it hurt you. Drinking won't bring him back and will just make you feel worse.

Please don't drink over this.

nez

My heart goes out to you. A few months back, I had to put down my baby girl dog of 13 years. It was extremely hard, but I had to do what was right for Peja. I still feel the loss, but that is part of the healing process. I could numb it with alcohol, but that would stop the healing process. Alcohol would not only numb the loss of Peja, it was also numb me to the people who love me and who are also feeling pain from the loss of our baby girl dog.

I did what was right for Peja. I am doing what is right for my loved ones by not drinking, which is helping them to heal from the loss of Peja. Walking side by side with them through the healing process, is what is right for me as well and helps with my healing process.

It hurts, but with the pain comes healing and growth, which numbing would never do. If I were to drink, the pain would be there when I woke up and it would have festered and grown and claimed more victims as collateral damage while I was out and numb.

Pain is a door. On the other side is a new and better you. Don't stay in the same room. Walk through the door. You did it for your beloved pet. Do it again for your family. Do it for you. You have the strength and people on here willing to walk with you. Serenity is not the absence of storms. It is peace in the midst of them.

Nothing is permanent, including this storm. Stay the course. Know peace. My heart goes out to you.

Hevyn

Hi jryan - I'm so glad you posted about what happened.
I'm sorry for that awful decision you had to make. It's the downside of pet ownership. But we can't love them any less - so losing them devastates us. The only way to avoid these feelings is to not have pets - and of course that isn't an option. Your feelings are justified - I've been through it too. Held my Lab while he received the shot that would end his life - and it was days before I could feel better. But I figured drinking would have somehow dishonored him. He was around when I was first getting sober & he was one of the reasons I didn't want to be walking around in a fog all the time. Your dog was all about being a great companion & adding to your enjoyment of life - he'd never want to have you fall apart because of losing him. Don't do it.

fishkiller

Sorry for your loss

You did the right thing. Don't second guess that.

I have waited longer than I should have because I wasn't ready and my poor animals had to suffer longer. My last dog I had to do this for was as you describe yours was and I wonder at times if it was too soon. But in my heart I know I saved him misery.

We all know drinking won't help.
There is only one thing that will help and that is time.

Steely

I'm so sorry jryan.

Feel the feelings, and honour your good old dog, even if painful. This is growth in sobriety.

Please don't add further to your loss by drinking. A terrible outcome in all ways possible.

VikingGF

Very sorry for your loss, so many of us have been in that horrible spot. Stay sober to honor your pet, work through the grief so you can remember the happy times. There is nothing easy about losing a dog of so many years, my heart hurts for you. The only way out of pain is through it, though, so stay strong and get to the other side. We never forget them, and they never leave us. Hugs to you and your family. Don't pick up. It will make bad things waaaaaay worse.

Dee74

I'm really sorry for your loss jryan.
I drank through the death or pets before, didn't help - made me feel worse.

Being drunk doesn't allow wounds to heal, We just stay in a red raw spot, and have to keep applying alcohol to the problem.

Grief is painful - but it's a natural reaction. We're meant to go through it.

Don't drink - be the man your dog always thought you were

D

Alpine

I am so sorry to hear of this. I know how hard it must have been and still is. Please do not drink.It will not help the situation and will make you feel worse in the end. Like someone above said honor your little one by not drinking. It will also help you heal and morn. Big hug to you. Please do not drink.

anxiousrock

So sorry to hear this, and we are all here for you. I think a lot of us can relate to your feelings and we're here to talk to

jryan19982

Thanks all. I'm feeling a little better today but still rather empty. My wife took the kids skiing for a few days since they have off school while I finish up work prior to having 10 days off. So it's just me and our other dog ( shes just over 6 months old). But I havent drank so that's good news. I'll soend some more time in the garage working on a few motorcycles and keep myself busy.

Thanks for all the replies.

Surrendered19

Hi jryan. I'll bet that 6 month old puppy doesn't give you much space to fret for too long, right? Great thing about kids and dogs. They just keep on marching forward even in the face of some sorrow.

I'm so effing sorry about your dear old dog. I think you made exactly the correct decision on his well-being and quality of life. I often see people let their animal companions linger until all quality of life is gone. That is no way to let them walk the rainbow bridge, and I commend you for being strong for your dog.

I hope the memories of him will be like roses in the winter for you.

Mags1

jryan, so sorry for your loss. When it comes to the time to ‘let our best friend go’ it’s devastating. Our av rages when we’re at this sad time and would like nothing better than us to pick up. Hard though it is, working through your grief and not drowning it will help you come to accept and honour the life they had with you.

ElizaD

I'm so sorry! We had to put our dog of 17 years to sleep earlier this year when his CHF had reached the point where he couldn't walk and I agonized over whether we made the right decision. I've had to make that decision three times in my life and it just sucks. Regarding your situation, most of us would want to go before we were in agonizing pain. I'm sure you made the right decision. The more you love the more you grieve so rather than trying to rid yourself of the hurt by drinking, allow yourself to experience it fully in honor of a wonderful dog.

Hawkeye13

I waited far too long on an elderly cat last year, and I did prolong her suffering.
I think you did the right thing. Wish I could go back in time and do the same.

Gabe1980

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Staying sober will truly help you grieve and work you way through this difficult time.

Sending love and support xx

least

It's so hard to let them go but you did the right thing, the loving thing for your dog.

In time you will remember him with love and not sorrow.