Dinner with my sports club - trigger free
 

This is inspired by Pekelover2’s minute-by-minute thread (which we’re all reading, so keep on posting). They mentioned going running, and I say any sort of exercise works wonders during withdrawal. I remember often running after I’d had a bottle of wine the night before, and the acid reflux shooting up into the chest area was scary. I used to think I was having heart attacks. So any morning exercise will certainly encourage a drinker to at least cut down the night before.

Anyway, here in the UK, Indian restaurants abound, and curry is probably the national dish. Unfortunately, it’s often washed down with numerous pints of ale. Most Indian restaurants open till late and are best avoided after 10pm or so as the clientele will be loud amongst other things. A lot of Indian restaurants, though, don’t have a licence to serve alcohol but allow customers to BYO (bring your own).

So it was to such a BYO place I went recently with my triathlon club. Fair to say, everyone in the club looks after their health to a reasonable and not fanatical level, and I’ve never seen anyone drinking heavily on any occasion. I didn’t bring any drinks along as I knew the restaurant would serve my favourite indian tea, but I was curious what others would bring. One couple did share a bottle of wine, but I think that was the only alcohol I saw all night. Everyone else brought AF or just ordered soft drinks or water.

Oh and when asked, I’ve said that I used to drink too much, became dependent and stopped. No one’s batted an eyelid.

It was a great evening, lots of laughs and it shows what we all know, i.e. don’t need alcohol for a good time. It further strengthens recovery to mix with people who don’t drink or do so moderately. My drinking buddies of old, who I’m very sad to say look terribly unhealthy now compared to my sports buddies, would’ve have a very different evening with the beers going into double figures.

I reckon this shows quitting and finding new interests means the ex-drinker will start mixing with people who don’t drink/do so moderately. Even in the UK, where drinking seems to be a national pastime, there are plenty of great people and stuff to do that doesn’t involve drinking.

Hodd, this is great stuff. I was surprised too that people paid little attention when I stopped drinking. It was a huge deal for me, but not so much for others. :)

Yeah I used to genuinely believe that the majority of people drank like I did. Today my usual group of friends rarely drink and then never to the extent I did….

I love a good curry too, Hodd. Glad it was a good, sober night :)

D

Great post Hodd. It is yet another great example of things so many of us over-worried when we quit drinking. I couldn't get my head around what people would think when I quit drinking, the scenes that would cause, the drama, MY GOD!!, the DRAMA!!!

Very few people noticed and nobody cared. We addicts can be such a self-centered bunch and if we just get ourselves back out among good people, what we used to drink or don't drink now is - of course - of little concern to anyone.

Loved your post Hodd!!!

Nice one, Hodd.

Your post reminded me of a friend's birthday party I attended when I was drinking. My friend was trying to set me up with a colleague of hers. He was training for a triathlon and he drank one beer, and left early! I remember thinking he was lovely to look at (well, actually he was fit and FIT!) but how could I ever consider someone who would only have one drink at a party?

I ended up chatting to a couple - the guy was totally blotto and rude to me, and his wife was so embarrassed. I let it slide because I knew he was drunk, and although I was drinking too, I was not a belligerent drinker. My friend, the hostess, later told me he was an important client of hers and she was grateful I was so gracious about it.

The whole scene was messy and awful. And yet I considered it kind of normal. I'd never put up with it today. I'd go for an hour for my friend, and leave early - like the triathlete, but without the one beer.

Good for you Hodd! :) Glad you had a good time with your friends. :)

It was a bit spicy 😀 but a few jugs of water helped.

Although they’re called Indian restaurants, in the UK they’re normally run by people with Pakistani roots who don’t drink for religious reasons. Many of the best places don’t sell alcohol nor want customers bringing it in. My poor wife would take me (as a drinker) to such places, and I’d bitch and moan. I was so accustomed to having at least 4 large beers with Indian food, that it just didn’t taste right if alcohol wasn’t available. Well, that’s also proved to be a myth. In rather dull nights out with colleagues in restaurants, they’ve all envied my mango lassi, masala chai or the pots of Chinese tea that get refilled for free. I’ll admit it takes getting used to at first, but we don’t need alcohol with food.

Some michelin restaurants, as far as I know, just include wine with the food. Luckily I’m not likely to ever be invited into a Michelin place, so that solves that problem 😀

This is a wonderful post. Thanks, Hodd.
PS I’ll bet that the food was delicious. Save me a doggie bag next time.

Great post Hodd. Thank you.

and...

Mango lassi is my fave. :)

It wasn’t a planned thing but my two favourite Northern Indian/Nepalese places are both BYO. My friends are drinkers but we all agree the food is superb and best not sullied with alcohol :)

D

This is a good thread. There is a lot of stuff here that was key to my own recovery.

It’s probably not the healthiest 😅 due to all that sugar, but I only need one. I’d never have had one beer.

And that’s another bonus. My previous 3 or 4 beers would have contained 800 calories. With those calories out the equation, I can have a starter or push the boat out and order popadoms! And if I notice my weight creeping up, I can watch my food intake for a week or two, and it’s sorted. Lot more room in our stomachs for the nicer stuff.

Good to read you had both a sober and an enjoyable night Hodd!

Thanks, Robbie, and I hope you’re doing OK. The drinking buddies I mentioned are up in the north east. They keep asking me to go up for a weekend, but I really am past the stage of sitting in pubs for hours. They always seem to end up watching football in a pub too, and I now find that really pointless. To be fair, none of them drink at home and aren’t dependent like I was, but they need to get some interests.