11 Months
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 221
11 Months
On Monday I will be 11 months sober. I never thought I would get here and I never thought it would get easier but it has. The last month or two I’ve began to tell people “I don’t drink anymore” or “I quit drinking” instead of making up a million excuses as to why I am not drinking. In the beginning that statement was scary to me because it seemed so final and then people may hold me accountable to those words but now it feels so liberating. Just to say it how it is and know I’ve made that commitment and it doesn’t matter who I tell because it is just a matter of fact about me.
That being said I’ve also learned to set boundaries and know that I don’t need to say yes to events and occasions that focus on alcohol just to please others. Tonight I went to a party which I knew would have a lot of drinking. I told my husband that I wouldn’t be there late and that when I started to feel uncomfortable and wanted to leave I would. I had a nice time and when drinking started getting heavier and people were getting more tipsy I simply said thank you for having me and left. And no one cared and being sober has also helped me realize that there are other people not drinking too. It isn’t just me and not everyone drinks. At the beginning of my sobriety I felt like I was going to be the only one who doesn’t drink at events but now I notice many others just like me enjoying being social with no alcohol.
Self care has become a priority in my life. It feels so good to treat yourself with things other then alcohol. A nice meal, a new outfit, new personal care products/ services. The choices are endless in ways you can treat yourself and relax.
I’m still rediscovering myself again now that I’m sober, but I’m getting there. I know I’m rambling but the last month coming up on a year I just feel like I’ve started to turn a corner in terms of my sobriety. Being more open, not afraid and more concrete in my resolve to stay sober.
After my successful night I wanted to share how grateful I am with people who understand.
LoveDD
That being said I’ve also learned to set boundaries and know that I don’t need to say yes to events and occasions that focus on alcohol just to please others. Tonight I went to a party which I knew would have a lot of drinking. I told my husband that I wouldn’t be there late and that when I started to feel uncomfortable and wanted to leave I would. I had a nice time and when drinking started getting heavier and people were getting more tipsy I simply said thank you for having me and left. And no one cared and being sober has also helped me realize that there are other people not drinking too. It isn’t just me and not everyone drinks. At the beginning of my sobriety I felt like I was going to be the only one who doesn’t drink at events but now I notice many others just like me enjoying being social with no alcohol.
Self care has become a priority in my life. It feels so good to treat yourself with things other then alcohol. A nice meal, a new outfit, new personal care products/ services. The choices are endless in ways you can treat yourself and relax.
I’m still rediscovering myself again now that I’m sober, but I’m getting there. I know I’m rambling but the last month coming up on a year I just feel like I’ve started to turn a corner in terms of my sobriety. Being more open, not afraid and more concrete in my resolve to stay sober.
After my successful night I wanted to share how grateful I am with people who understand.
LoveDD
And thank you for such an encouraging and uplifting post. 
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Join Date: Nov 2020
Posts: 517
Great post LoveDD and congratulations!! I can relate to so many things you said especially the being open to other people that you don’t drink anymore. I’m still very much plagued by the excuses for why I don’t drink so you gave me hope that one day ill get past that worry.
Keep going and I hope you are so very proud of yourself because you definitely should be!! ❤️
Keep going and I hope you are so very proud of yourself because you definitely should be!! ❤️
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 221
Originally Posted by Bodhi02 
Great post LoveDD and congratulations!! I can relate to so many things you said especially the being open to other people that you don’t drink anymore. I’m still very much plagued by the excuses for why I don’t drink so you gave me hope that one day ill get past that worry.
Keep going and I hope you are so very proud of yourself because you definitely should be!! ❤️
Keep going and I hope you are so very proud of yourself because you definitely should be!! ❤️
Cheers,
LoveDD
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Join Date: Jan 2021
Location: NC
Posts: 1,655
Hi Love DD! Congrats on 11 months. Nice post. I will be 11 months in a few days myself. I have yet to have gone to a party, wedding etc.. since I quit drinking. Partly due to feeling I am not ready and also because of the pandemic. I have done dinners out where friends were drinking and it was okay. The drinking on TV bothers me some and seems pervasive. Anyway, keep going! You are doing great!
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Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: The Midwest
Posts: 649
Originally Posted by LoveDD
On Monday I will be 11 months sober. I never thought I would get here and I never thought it would get easier but it has. The last month or two I’ve began to tell people “I don’t drink anymore” or “I quit drinking” instead of making up a million excuses as to why I am not drinking. In the beginning that statement was scary to me because it seemed so final and then people may hold me accountable to those words but now it feels so liberating. Just to say it how it is and know I’ve made that commitment and it doesn’t matter who I tell because it is just a matter of fact about me.
Exactly the same on telling people. I haven't been so forward as to say "I'm an alcoholic," but I've told colleagues, friends, cousins, family - that I can't/don't drink alcohol anymore. I was so afraid of the finality of that. But I've realized that it's a huge part of letting go. I can see very clearly now that in past "attempts" I always had a "drink at the end of the tunnel" for my AV to latch onto. Kind of like, "I'm sober now so I can drink 'normal' later," or, "Everyone relapses. I'm sure I'll have a relapse at some point."
It's such a major shift when you expand the accountability out beyond yourself to the people you love and interact with most.
Originally Posted by LoveDD
That being said I’ve also learned to set boundaries and know that I don’t need to say yes to events and occasions that focus on alcohol just to please others. Tonight I went to a party which I knew would have a lot of drinking. I told my husband that I wouldn’t be there late and that when I started to feel uncomfortable and wanted to leave I would. I had a nice time and when drinking started getting heavier and people were getting more tipsy I simply said thank you for having me and left. And no one cared and being sober has also helped me realize that there are other people not drinking too. It isn’t just me and not everyone drinks. At the beginning of my sobriety I felt like I was going to be the only one who doesn’t drink at events but now I notice many others just like me enjoying being social with no alcohol.
Originally Posted by LoveDD
Self care has become a priority in my life. It feels so good to treat yourself with things other then alcohol. A nice meal, a new outfit, new personal care products/ services. The choices are endless in ways you can treat yourself and relax.
.
Originally Posted by LoveDD
I’m still rediscovering myself again now that I’m sober, but I’m getting there. I know I’m rambling but the last month coming up on a year I just feel like I’ve started to turn a corner in terms of my sobriety. Being more open, not afraid and more concrete in my resolve to stay sober.
After my successful night I wanted to share how grateful I am with people who understand.
LoveDD
After my successful night I wanted to share how grateful I am with people who understand.
LoveDD
The biggest milestone for me was I took some major steps to forgiving my past, alcoholic self. I think I externalized my AV so much in the beginning, that I started to loathe not my AV, but every part of my drinking self. Finding some empathy for that broken former me has been another big step in the healing journey.
Keep onward
. When is your one-year date?Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
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Originally Posted by LoveDD
Self care has become a priority in my life. It feels so good to treat yourself with things other then alcohol. A nice meal, a new outfit, new personal care products/ services. The choices are endless in ways you can treat yourself and relax.
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