maldugs

Hi everyone, I am a drinker, I drink red wine in the evenings, I drink a bottle every night, however I can stop when I feel like it, don't open another, I never get drunk, become aggressive, forget what happened, let my family down, I don't drink during the day, unless we have a BBQ, niether do I drink when I drive, I just like to relax with a drink at night. I am very active, play lawn bowls, bike ride, fish, and enjoy life.

I have been drinking for around 20 years, my wife thinks I am an alchoholic, what do you think?

Mal. :hello2

lulu70

Hi Mal--Unfortunately, no one can answer that question but you. If you are really concerned about it, why not try giving it up for a month and see what happens. Regardless, welcome to SR. Hang out for a while, read some posts, and see if you can relate. Others will be along soon.

Anna

Hi Mal,

Lulu's right - give yourself a time period of a month with absolutely no drinking and see how it goes. That should give you the answer to your question.

Anna

Ama

Good advice!

Do try giving up for a month and see how you feel. One of my best friends gives up every year for 40 days and says it is abit hard from the social point of things!!!! But she is so NOT alcoholic you see and can take it or leave it.

Alcoholics CAN NOT - Alas.......I wish you well ......Luvs Ama

Jerry K

I agree with the others that have responded BUT have one very good idea should you decide you are not addicted.

Make the xx day test an annual thing. Choose a date like your anniverary or birthdate. A date that you will not forget.

Why? Becasue I once too was not addicted and drank very responsible for many years. But then at age 57 I found myself addicted and did create problems in the later years. When it happened, I do not know, but it did!

I am now over 1 year sober and enjoying life without any alcohol and never want to go back to where I was just that one year ago.

Just a thought.

nutz

There's also defects or habits that I'm not aware of.
Which might lead someone to think that I have a problem.

exmaple:
my ex-wife use to go ape-sh@t when cleaning
house and finding matches on the floor or carpet. It was me
that was doing it. Unless it's was the mail man.lol
She confronted me. I denied it, as I lit a cigg and tossed a match
stick on the floor, I didn't know what the heck she was talking about.lol
She picked up the match and showed it to me, it was still smoking
a little. I still didn't want to addmitted, I told her she was neet picking me.

The woman filed for a divorce after a couple years of stuff like that.
She also told me I had a drinking problem. Funny, she drank and party
with me all the time, so how could she say such a thing.
I still had everything and was still funtional. I was only 22 at the time.

Don S

Hi, Mal,
Why does she think you're an alcoholic?
Don S

Debby

Everyone is in agreement, give yourself a month and see how you feel.

And keep in mind that your wife may see something you dont. I know my husband was drinking and I saw something he didnt. He would quit drinking and be fine, there were no withdrawls or anything but he went back after a month or so anyways.

There are different types of alcoholics. Some who do it everyday, or some who are closet drinkers, some who need it for occasions like your BBQ, etc...

Give it a try what do you have to lose? Maybe you are just a social drinker, maybe your not, but isnt it worth finding out?
Let us know
Debby

birdonawire

Is your wife upset because a bottle of wine a day seems like alcoholic drinking? (lots of french people drink that much) or is it that she doesn't like the way you are after a bottle- perhaps a bit of a couch potato? (I was!) Either way, a bottle is a tad too much for health reasons...alcohol washes valuable nutrients and vitamins out of your body, especially the B vitamins, which are linked with a healthy brain as you age. I don't think quitting shows if you have a dependence...I think drinking 2 glasses a night (1/2 bottle)- which is considered to be healthy and good for your heart- would be the real test. I tried and tried, but over the years even one bottle wasn't enough. All the best, Bird

maldugs

Hi Don s and Bird, she thinks I am an alcoholic because I drink a bottle of wine a night, but last year I was in hospital for a month and had nothing to drink and no problem with that. I guess it's also that my brother has ruined his career and life with alcohol, he will drink all day and night if he can, was a lawyer, now works as a labourer (when he can) I thinks she scared I will end up like him, but I'm 65 and it hasen't happened yet and it's not going to!!

Mal.

birdonawire

Hi there, if you are being perfectly honest and your drinking is not causing any trouble, then I don't think you have a problem. I still think you should tell your doctor how much you drink. I bet your doctor will suggest you cut down to 2 glasses, or 1/2 bottle of wine...would you be able to do this if asked? Just curious...Bird