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2 weeks and having thoughts

Old 08-29-2021, 09:02 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Congrats on the the two weeks, that is awesome!

In the early days of my recovery, it was difficult to remember that my drinking didn't start out as hell. Even though my drinking fast-tracked, my descent into hell took more than two weeks. It was a slow journey that took a few years before I found myself in hell.

When I look at it like that, I realize that my recovery journey has not taken anywhere near as long. The energy and spunk came back with recovery and is real and longer lasting; as opposed to the delusional and temporary energy and spunk of drinking.

The rewards of sobriety have been worth every inch gained. :~)

You can, and are, doing this!


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Old 08-30-2021, 05:13 AM
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I do realize I’m still very very very early and that’s why is called “recovery”.
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Old 08-30-2021, 05:38 AM
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Recovery is such a process. Im not sure when I made it to "recovery" but I know it was not in the first few months of getting sober. I had so much internal messiness happening that it took me months to level off and find a bit of even ground. It was around month 3 that I started to feel some sort of new balance. Up until that point I was chopping wood and carrying water. Chop wood and carry water. The early days were rough. Very rough. You are doing well. Keep doing that!
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Old 08-30-2021, 05:50 AM
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Originally Posted by Jillian2563 View Post
I do realize I’m still very very very early and that’s why is called “recovery”.
You have an unusually good understanding of the process for the time you have been here. I sense you are simply reporting those day to day struggles most of us have dealt with, and that's good. Expressing those things is better than keeping them to yourself, and later finding out you could have found a better way to deal with them.

Sometimes I worry about sounding like a mother hen in my responses, but I think it's important to address those concerns when they are brought up. When I was at your stage, I took my concerns seriously too. Some turn out to be red herrings, but sometimes the group would offer a thing I hadn't thought of, which would make me a little more confident and a bit stronger.

Thanks for this morning's check in. You were gone for the weekend, and I was wondering how you were. OK maybe I was a little bit worried too.
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Old 08-30-2021, 06:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Mizz View Post
Recovery is such a process. Im not sure when I made it to "recovery" but I know it was not in the first few months of getting sober. I had so much internal messiness happening that it took me months to level off and find a bit of even ground. It was around month 3 that I started to feel some sort of new balance. Up until that point I was chopping wood and carrying water. Chop wood and carry water. The early days were rough. Very rough. You are doing well. Keep doing that!
This time doesn’t seem so rough for some reason but I’ll take it. I’m processing my thoughts and emotions much better. And coming here to type my thoughts definitely helps.

Originally Posted by DriGuy View Post
You have an unusually good understanding of the process for the time you have been here. I sense you are simply reporting those day to day struggles most of us have dealt with, and that's good. Expressing those things is better than keeping them to yourself, and later finding out you could have found a better way to deal with them.

Sometimes I worry about sounding like a mother hen in my responses, but I think it's important to address those concerns when they are brought up. When I was at your stage, I took my concerns seriously too. Some turn out to be red herrings, but sometimes the group would offer a thing I hadn't thought of, which would make me a little more confident and a bit stronger.

Thanks for this morning's check in. You were gone for the weekend, and I was wondering how you were. OK maybe I was a little bit worried too.

Im so grateful for your feedback and everyone else’s! Just getting my thoughts out and reading everyone’s response helps me process everything, look at different views, and keep an open mind. I didn’t really have much time yesterday, as my husband and I took our late friends Chevy SSR for a cruise in his honor, went to brunch, and took the kids on the boat. It was such a wonderful day - my husband and I sure needed some alone time, and while he drank, I didn’t. Onto day 17 now. Got a list of things to do, and AA meeting is next. Getting ready to go to FL on Friday 🥰
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Old 08-30-2021, 09:33 AM
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[QUOTE=Jillian2563;7691175]This time doesn’t seem so rough for some reason but I’ll take it. I’m processing my thoughts and emotions much better. And coming here to type my thoughts definitely helps.




Im so grateful for your feedback and everyone else’s! Just getting my thoughts out and reading everyone’s response helps me process everything, look at different views, and keep an open mind.

This sounds like me 19 months ago.
Not drinking wasn't hard as I thought it would be because I truly did not want to drink ever again but it wasn't super easy either because I had been in that pattern forever.

Just posting to let you know you are doing the right thing by posting your thoughts.
Not every reply will always be what you want to hear and some may not even apply but listening with an open mind you will gain knowledge and wisdom from even those posts.

I still have drinking thoughts. Sometimes I find myself giving them too much head space. Anything longer than a second is too long.

We Know we can't drink. We Do not Want to drink anymore.
So we dont.

Whenever I am around drinkers or have that fleeting thought of a drink I simply tell myself and anyone who asks,
I Do Not Drink.

It really is that simple
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Old 08-31-2021, 08:11 PM
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You're doing great, Jillian! Early days are somewhat of a rollercoaster (understatement) so reaching out is just the best and safest option and with so much wisdom available, something is going to bring on that lightbulb moment or provide balance during a shaky day or moment. Keep going, I'm right here with you.
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Old 09-01-2021, 12:03 AM
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I know what it’s like to entertain thoughts of drinking again. Always regretted it. It’s never worth it.

try getting some exercise. A real work out that leaves you tired. Or, ice cream always helps with cravings immediately in early sobriety!
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Old 09-02-2021, 09:26 AM
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How's it going Jillian? Haven't heard from you in a couple of days, hope all is well.
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Old 09-02-2021, 09:52 AM
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I hope you're doing well, Jillian.
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Old 09-02-2021, 01:32 PM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
How's it going Jillian? Haven't heard from you in a couple of days, hope all is well.
Thanks for checking on me! Tomorrow will be 3 weeks sober.

This week has been tough because I’ve had some adverse affects form the recent meds I started. Severe abdominal pain is no fun. Tomorrow we leave for FL and I’m terrified I will have the pain on the way down. I stopped the meds yesterday. Hoping it doesn’t happen again. Pain so bad I’ve been doubled over in pain.
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Old 09-02-2021, 01:40 PM
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I’d definitely check in with your Dr, Jillian.

D
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Old 09-02-2021, 01:54 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
I’d definitely check in with your Dr, Jillian.

D
I did, the prescribing dr anyway and he said my side effects are uncommon but discontinue. I know it’s from the meds, I’ve never had pain like that ever!!
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