30 Days No Alcohol
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2021
Location: Seeking a peaceful state of mind
Posts: 99
30 Days No Alcohol
Greetings everyone, I hope everyone is doing well. I'm sorry for my absence from the forum. I felt that I needed some time away, not exactly sure how to explain but I was and still am going through a lot personally and professionally and being back on the road to a sober life felt like too much to take on.
So it is 30 days I have gone without any alcohol. I'm not exactly sure what to say.I am trying to be happy and appreciate that I've made it this far. The last time I quit, I made it about six weeks, I think it was almost 7 I'm not sure but eventually I gave into the splitting headaches and went back to the alcohol. I'm still dealing with the headaches, my sleep pattern is still not solid, and I am extremely fatigued most days. It's so strange to me that when I wake up in the morning I feel as though I've hit by a truck. I feel worse than I would feel after a long night of boozing it up. I feel achy and tired and sometimes a bit disoriented, and, I take quite a long time to get moving in the morning.
With that said I do enjoy moments of mental clarity that I haven't felt in a while although from time to time I transpose my words and sometimes I do it two or three times in a row as if I'm stuck. My kids laugh at me when I do it two or three times. I do believe that if there is such a thing as post acute withdrawal syndrome, that I do indeed have it. I a did go to my doctor today, saw his nurse practitioner, which sometimes is actually better than the doctor because they can do just about everything a doctor can. We had a long talk about what's going on and I told him that I have been feeling pretty darned bad since I quit drinking. He was very pleased that I was without alcohol for 30 days. Upon examining me said that I was not jaundice, perhaps a tiny bit in the corners of my eyes, but not enough to be concerned about, given that I do know from my layman's knowledge that everyone's Billy Rubin backs up a bit from time to time. He ordered labs, bloodwork actually, however, I wasn't able to make it to the off-site lab to get my blood drawn in time. But once they open up again tomorrow I will go in and get the blood drawn. Damn I hate needles! Also have a nasty bruise there for weeks because I bruise very easily and have noticed that I have almost paper skin sometimes. If I barely bang my arm on something it scratches it open and bleeds.
Instead of ruminating over what could be about my future health, I try to let it go because I know that I do have early-stage cirrhosis without ascites and that I should never drink another drop of alcohol again. I should also lose weight, quite a bit of its and try to build back my strength and my health. I am trying to focus on those things and also the positive factors of quitting, and I feel this time that it is really different, that I really will never drink again. There is always that lingering doubt or fear I suppose.
On that note, the book called Alcohol Explained has really helped me and I highly recommend it. I just got the part two on my audible and started it last night. I could not recommend that book enough. I think for the first time in my whole life I understand that my anxieties and fears are what have been driving me to drink and am myself and that I am at a point where I can never have another drink, because one drink will never be just one drink it will be many and often if I have only one.
I am sorry for rambling, I did want to get a thread in before the end of the night, 30 June. It's 11:50 PM my time, so I'm just getting in under the wire, ha ha.
I want to thank so much everyone who's supported me. I am actually welling up in fighting back some tears right now. I have a lot of emotional swings and I know that that's not going to end soon and I know that that's exacerbated by the fact that I've always been an emotional guy. There's some heavy stuff in my personal life, my wife and kids left the country to visit her family. This was sort of sudden, we've been talking about it and I had many misgivings, but she does have the right to see her family and I do want her to be happy in spite of the difficulties that we've been having for years. I guess I brought this up because of my emotional swings and it's so strange to be alone in this house. I wish I had a buddy locally that I can hang out with. A buddy who doesn't drink or doesn't care about it, but the truth is I've always been a bit of a loner and I've never really been good at letting people in and get close to me. Including my wife. Through the past 4 1/2 years of counseling I have learned a lot about myself and my childhood I think I understand a lot better why I drink. Well once again I'm rambling.
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! Thank you all! I really don't think I could've made it this 30 days without this forum and discovering that book. I responded to a private message I was sent and I hope that form member gets back to me. I'll try to check in more often.
I am looking forward to another 30 days without alcohol and am hoping that my strength and vitality returns more and more.
Max
So it is 30 days I have gone without any alcohol. I'm not exactly sure what to say.I am trying to be happy and appreciate that I've made it this far. The last time I quit, I made it about six weeks, I think it was almost 7 I'm not sure but eventually I gave into the splitting headaches and went back to the alcohol. I'm still dealing with the headaches, my sleep pattern is still not solid, and I am extremely fatigued most days. It's so strange to me that when I wake up in the morning I feel as though I've hit by a truck. I feel worse than I would feel after a long night of boozing it up. I feel achy and tired and sometimes a bit disoriented, and, I take quite a long time to get moving in the morning.
With that said I do enjoy moments of mental clarity that I haven't felt in a while although from time to time I transpose my words and sometimes I do it two or three times in a row as if I'm stuck. My kids laugh at me when I do it two or three times. I do believe that if there is such a thing as post acute withdrawal syndrome, that I do indeed have it. I a did go to my doctor today, saw his nurse practitioner, which sometimes is actually better than the doctor because they can do just about everything a doctor can. We had a long talk about what's going on and I told him that I have been feeling pretty darned bad since I quit drinking. He was very pleased that I was without alcohol for 30 days. Upon examining me said that I was not jaundice, perhaps a tiny bit in the corners of my eyes, but not enough to be concerned about, given that I do know from my layman's knowledge that everyone's Billy Rubin backs up a bit from time to time. He ordered labs, bloodwork actually, however, I wasn't able to make it to the off-site lab to get my blood drawn in time. But once they open up again tomorrow I will go in and get the blood drawn. Damn I hate needles! Also have a nasty bruise there for weeks because I bruise very easily and have noticed that I have almost paper skin sometimes. If I barely bang my arm on something it scratches it open and bleeds.
Instead of ruminating over what could be about my future health, I try to let it go because I know that I do have early-stage cirrhosis without ascites and that I should never drink another drop of alcohol again. I should also lose weight, quite a bit of its and try to build back my strength and my health. I am trying to focus on those things and also the positive factors of quitting, and I feel this time that it is really different, that I really will never drink again. There is always that lingering doubt or fear I suppose.
On that note, the book called Alcohol Explained has really helped me and I highly recommend it. I just got the part two on my audible and started it last night. I could not recommend that book enough. I think for the first time in my whole life I understand that my anxieties and fears are what have been driving me to drink and am myself and that I am at a point where I can never have another drink, because one drink will never be just one drink it will be many and often if I have only one.
I am sorry for rambling, I did want to get a thread in before the end of the night, 30 June. It's 11:50 PM my time, so I'm just getting in under the wire, ha ha.
I want to thank so much everyone who's supported me. I am actually welling up in fighting back some tears right now. I have a lot of emotional swings and I know that that's not going to end soon and I know that that's exacerbated by the fact that I've always been an emotional guy. There's some heavy stuff in my personal life, my wife and kids left the country to visit her family. This was sort of sudden, we've been talking about it and I had many misgivings, but she does have the right to see her family and I do want her to be happy in spite of the difficulties that we've been having for years. I guess I brought this up because of my emotional swings and it's so strange to be alone in this house. I wish I had a buddy locally that I can hang out with. A buddy who doesn't drink or doesn't care about it, but the truth is I've always been a bit of a loner and I've never really been good at letting people in and get close to me. Including my wife. Through the past 4 1/2 years of counseling I have learned a lot about myself and my childhood I think I understand a lot better why I drink. Well once again I'm rambling.
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! Thank you all! I really don't think I could've made it this 30 days without this forum and discovering that book. I responded to a private message I was sent and I hope that form member gets back to me. I'll try to check in more often.
I am looking forward to another 30 days without alcohol and am hoping that my strength and vitality returns more and more.
Max
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,504
I'm glad you found that book Max. Sometimes it is a simple thing such as this that can turn the whole thing around, and it sounds as though this is what is happening. And it can be an emotional time in the beginning. Lots of thoughts and feelings beginning to emerge, which is a good thing, even if painful at times. Good to hear a man express these emotions.
Sounds as though you've wrapped your head around the health health implications of your drinking and have acted decisively. Some don't Max. Look forward to seeing your liver tests start to come up roses.
I dont know if you have PAWS or not Max, but there is a thread in the "Alcoholism" forum here, that addresses that very problem. Maybe look around and talk with others who are going through similar. One thing to know isthat PAWS does improve, disappear with time. The most important thing is not to drink. The rest will fall in place.
I'm really glad you've made it back Max. Congratulations on 30 days.
Sounds as though you've wrapped your head around the health health implications of your drinking and have acted decisively. Some don't Max. Look forward to seeing your liver tests start to come up roses.
I dont know if you have PAWS or not Max, but there is a thread in the "Alcoholism" forum here, that addresses that very problem. Maybe look around and talk with others who are going through similar. One thing to know isthat PAWS does improve, disappear with time. The most important thing is not to drink. The rest will fall in place.
I'm really glad you've made it back Max. Congratulations on 30 days.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,229
Continue to look to those who know how to remain
sober no matter what. Find out how they do it. How
do they maintain sobriety each day and what their
routine consist of.
There's not a one fit fits all, so find what you like
and see in that person and tag along until you
get it.
What works for one or many may not work for
you. However, what ever is helping them remain
sober, find contentment, peace, serenity, honesty,
strength, willingness, faith, then it must be agreeing
with them.
Alcohol has no place in their lives. It was a toxic
substance running rapid thru their lives destroying
their heart, mind and soul.
Recovery replaced a many a folks addiction and
are now living to be the best, healthiest, sincere,
selfless person they can be moving forward in their
sober lives.
sober no matter what. Find out how they do it. How
do they maintain sobriety each day and what their
routine consist of.
There's not a one fit fits all, so find what you like
and see in that person and tag along until you
get it.
What works for one or many may not work for
you. However, what ever is helping them remain
sober, find contentment, peace, serenity, honesty,
strength, willingness, faith, then it must be agreeing
with them.
Alcohol has no place in their lives. It was a toxic
substance running rapid thru their lives destroying
their heart, mind and soul.
Recovery replaced a many a folks addiction and
are now living to be the best, healthiest, sincere,
selfless person they can be moving forward in their
sober lives.
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