Auchieshuggle

After 571 days' sobriety, I stupidly imagined I could go to the pub with my friends and not drink.

I am now drunk after 5 bottles of Newcastle Brown, 4 bottles of beer, 3 cans of lager and a whiskey.

I feel like crying. How could I be so utterly stupid? I'm terrified I will go back to the way I was. One thing I have learned is that I cannot ever go into a pub again.

Pray for me, please!

Dee74

Hey Auggie

I'm sorry you drank but you won't go back to where you were, unless you want to, and it's pretty clear you don't.

Use the community here like you did last time...we'll give you good advice and companionship as you embark on Recovery 2.0 - new and improved....all you learned & accomplished in your sober time is still there

Try and relax - get some sleep - things always look better in the morning
D

stickyone

First thing is to do stop drinking. Get some food and water in you. Tomorrow morning go from there. Hope the best stay safe my friend.

Auchieshuggle

Thanks, guys! I can already feel the monstrous hangover approaching.

To any lurkers, please don't make the same mistake. It wasn't even an enjoyable experience, and now I have to face the misery of a hangover, the fear I will go back to my old ways, and the shame and regret of having been so bloody stupid. It's not worth it.

7th May will be my new day 1.

ScottFromWI

Glad you came here to work through this Auchie. You had some significant sober time under your belt so you know what to do. Even though this is a significant setback, it doesn't erase the work you've done in the past. Learn from it and see if you can figure out what decisions you made that led up to the night at the pub - most times we've made the decision to drink well before we actually do it. And once you learn, apply it and adjust/add to your plan so it doesn't happen again.

columbus

It's a powerful, powerful lesson for sure.

I honestly think you'll benefit in the long run.

brighterday1234

Powerful lesson but you can absolutely stay sober and keep them days at a time racking up. If you learn from your experience it can be the thing that makes you stay sober permanently 🙏

dwtbd

Even if 'we' make decisions well before the actual tipping of the glass, the seconds before the tipping are the times to focus on and review what it was you were thinking, eh ? Literally the seconds before you tipped it back , identify that decision and its locus and go from there, if you have ambitions to be a common teetotaler.

RAL

Glad you came back straight away. you've not lost your sober time, you still have those 571 days and can start afresh tomorrow.

Please don't beat yourself up and keep drinking. Focus your energies on starting again.

Anna

Yes, build on what you know and what you've learned. Be kind to yourself and move forward.

Scd619x

Why did you drink? Let's put aside going into a wet place with friends as a reason though. Can you answer this question? The reason i ask is that i have seen multitudes of people get years of sobriety under their belt only to drink again and not have a clue why they did! And therein is the problem. If you don't know why you drink then you have little defence when the time comes that you allow yourself to go into a situation when you would have drunk before. So that, imo, is your journey this time round. Why do you drink? But don't ne content with the standard blurb as this reason will be personal to you. For now though, it's food time, sleep time, water time, relax time, and to get some days under your belt again.

The problem with drinking again after 571 days is that you are not going to believe that if you do the same thing again that you will last 572 so be aware of that. Your new plan is asap to find out through all the support out there and here as to why you drink, that way when you hit 571 days next time and go to the pub and the newcay brown is put in front of you, you will smile and know why you don't drink and push it back and say nah i'll have a xwhateverx instead boys.

Auchieshuggle

1. Well I was warned that I shouldn't go to the pub, but I confidently predicted I would be fine as three weeks ago I sat in a beer garden. -> Complacency

2. When I got to the pub, the pal I was meeting was there with two friends of his who I didn't know. Now I don't come across as shy, but I am and I found this a bit disconcerting. -> Confidence booster/social lubricant

3. Everyone there was drinking and merry, as this was the first time Glaswegians could actually enter a pub for months. I was envious and nostalgic. -> Temptation.

I actually had a nightmare that I would drink in the pub, and when I awoke, yesterday morning, I was relieved that it was just a dream.


1) I will start attending meetings again. -> This is a life long struggle, and I CANNOT ever be complacent.
2) ???? Work on my self esteem, social interaction? Maybe ask to do more presentations in work, or something?
3) Remove myself from temptation as much as possible. Coffee shops only in future.

Dee74

I hope you feel a little better today Auchie (sorry my auto correct mind keeps going to Auggie)

D

Steely

We've all done it Auchie.

You've learned valuable lesson, and from the sound of your post you have learned well.

Rest, hydrate, and porridge

Serious. Did some training on diet in first few days. Porrige was a winner.

All will be well so long as you don't drink.

Good on you for getting back straight up.

Boondock

Howdy, get back up dust yourself off put a plug in the jug and start over. No biggie it doesn't change the 571 days sober.

Hevyn

Hi Auchie. Sometimes we just need further proof that it's never going to be fun or exciting. It brings only misery & despair. Now you'll be more determined than ever to stay healthy & free. It's going to be ok!

Hodd

Been a tough year, Auchie. Don't be too hard on yourself.

I'm convinced we all have a breaking point trigger. Yours is the pub. You know what (not) to do in future.

Hope you're not feeling too rough physically. I'd be gutted, but as I say, stay out the pub.

EllyB

I am right there with you. Complacency, reopening, booze a plenty...in my case it was a party at home. I only had 130 days, but we can do this. It sucks though.

Reid82

Sorry to hear that you drank again, Auchieshuggle. You're right though, you need to be guard 24/7 with this thing. Be thankfully that you'll be able to
nip this in the bud quickly and not let it spiral out of the control.

freedomfries

I'm sorry you drank. But remember, one slip up doesn't undo all your sober time and the lessons you've learned. You came back and posted here and got right back on the sobriety saddle. That's great.