Captain relapse
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,361
Captain relapse
Today i'm on day 1, after a one year-ish relapse.
I stopped using for fun a long time ago, just use to make it through the day.
My thoughts are a mess, my emotions, and my life in general.
Ive been barking up the mental health tree for a few months not, not making the connection my massive weed habit perhaps plays a role.
On the verge of a divorce and loosing my job.
A proper cluster-****
I really don't know were to start to make my mind and life better, apart from the NA programma.
Cause maybe a divorce and a new job eventually is for the best.
I really don't know atm.
Take care,
I stopped using for fun a long time ago, just use to make it through the day.
My thoughts are a mess, my emotions, and my life in general.
Ive been barking up the mental health tree for a few months not, not making the connection my massive weed habit perhaps plays a role.
On the verge of a divorce and loosing my job.
A proper cluster-****
I really don't know were to start to make my mind and life better, apart from the NA programma.
Cause maybe a divorce and a new job eventually is for the best.
I really don't know atm.
Take care,
Member
Join Date: Dec 2020
Posts: 172
Understand exactly where you are coming from.
It massively sucks and feel you've lost control. It's scary.
I'll let others give better advice than me but I can sympathise exactly where you are at.
Stay strong mate, I have a long way to go also.
It massively sucks and feel you've lost control. It's scary.
I'll let others give better advice than me but I can sympathise exactly where you are at.
Stay strong mate, I have a long way to go also.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 754
Welcome (back) 
Sounds like you have a ton of reasons to quit. Are you having problems only with the excessive weed use or do you use other substances as well?
It’s a good thing you are reaching out. Lots of knowledgeable people here with vast amounts of experience.
Wish you all the strength you need for getting through day 1, which can be a real tough one.
Sounds like you have a ton of reasons to quit. Are you having problems only with the excessive weed use or do you use other substances as well?
It’s a good thing you are reaching out. Lots of knowledgeable people here with vast amounts of experience.
Wish you all the strength you need for getting through day 1, which can be a real tough one.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Drugs fry the brain.
The chemically altered version of me wasn't doing well either.
When I quit, even though I was a mental wreck on the inside for about a year (off and on) my performance and effort shown through.
The benefits of quitting we immediate and ever growing.
Having my head stuck in the sand of life using drugs to cope was something I learned from the time I was a child.
SR taught me better.
Getting clean hurts like hell. Staying clean causes stress as well. But, both also feel amazing.
Every day feels like I get an "ataboy."
Folks respect sober.
Thanks.
The chemically altered version of me wasn't doing well either.
When I quit, even though I was a mental wreck on the inside for about a year (off and on) my performance and effort shown through.
The benefits of quitting we immediate and ever growing.
Having my head stuck in the sand of life using drugs to cope was something I learned from the time I was a child.
SR taught me better.
Getting clean hurts like hell. Staying clean causes stress as well. But, both also feel amazing.
Every day feels like I get an "ataboy."
Folks respect sober.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
You being back here says everything. It's clear there is a part of you that wants and needs and is driven towards fixing your life and getting sober. Focus on that aspect of yourself. Honor it, give it space and do the work. Welcome back.
Member
Join Date: May 2021
Location: Upper Chichester, Pennsylvania
Posts: 121
I sounds like things are pretty crazy and mixxed up for you right now. I think that if you put one foot in front of the other each day and don’t drink you will see a clearing away of the debris and a chance to rebuild on a firmer foundation.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,509
Welcome back, ComingClean, and I can relate to how overwhelming it feels for you and wondering where to start. Take it slow, get through each day, try to accomplish a couple of things each day to help you feel you are progressing. Having a recovery plan in place will really help you through early recovery.
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