We’re expected to drink
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Originally Posted by tufty13 
Purely anecdotal.... but two of my children who are in their twenties and have never drunk tell me it’s the norm in their peer group. They just can’t fathom why people consume alcohol, apparently it’s actually really cool to be abstinent. How time’s have changed!
They can learn about what drugs (booze) do to the mind. How it alters us and not just for the time we feel "high."
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2021
Location: London
Posts: 333
The majority of people drink with no issue whatsoever, at varying levels. I know people that drink once in a blue moon and others that drink every night, it's their choice and they are perfectly happy with that. It would be impossible to explain what it is like to lose control over your drinking to someone who hasn't experienced that.
Your post reminded me of when i first got sober lol. I would tell everyone i didn't drink as soon as meeting them and people looked at me like i was mental. I remember I went to lunch at a job i had been at for 2 days and at a table of 12 announced that i did not drink, the table went quiet for a moment then carried on talking. In my mind they went quiet because they must have known that i was an 'alcoholic' but of course they just thought it was an odd thing to think and didn't care. I've learned that some people drink and some don't, it's easier in my 40s to go out without feeling any pressure to drink than in my 20s though.
OMG i just remembered i went to a works night do years ago, there were about 20 people there and i went round the room apologising to people because i was not drinking but was having a good time anyway, oh man
Bottom line for me is no-one needs to know i don't drink alcohol, if I'm out i have a diet coke because I fancy one and as an adult it is my choice what i drink and when.
Your post reminded me of when i first got sober lol. I would tell everyone i didn't drink as soon as meeting them and people looked at me like i was mental. I remember I went to lunch at a job i had been at for 2 days and at a table of 12 announced that i did not drink, the table went quiet for a moment then carried on talking. In my mind they went quiet because they must have known that i was an 'alcoholic' but of course they just thought it was an odd thing to think and didn't care. I've learned that some people drink and some don't, it's easier in my 40s to go out without feeling any pressure to drink than in my 20s though.
OMG i just remembered i went to a works night do years ago, there were about 20 people there and i went round the room apologising to people because i was not drinking but was having a good time anyway, oh man
Bottom line for me is no-one needs to know i don't drink alcohol, if I'm out i have a diet coke because I fancy one and as an adult it is my choice what i drink and when.
Member
Join Date: May 2021
Location: Nottingham, UK
Posts: 150
Hi Hodd
I can defo relate to this. When ever I visit my brother and sister-in-law my brother always asks me to bring him a bottle of whiskey and he'll pay me back. If he buys it himself he says his wife nags him so he gets me to. So then he'll pour a drink for himself and me (even though I don't like whiskey) and being stupid I drink it. Then a few mins later he will pour us some more.
Without wanting to sound like I'm making excuses if I were to refuse I know he'd pressure me and say I was no fun etc.
It's also a society issue I think. It's expected you have a drink to toast something. On your birthday, Christmas and the weekend etc. If you don't drink some people seem to think you're a bit weird. Sad but true.
29 months sober is amazing. I'm sure you're much healthier (mentally and physically) because of it. Well done my friend and fellow Brit!
I can defo relate to this. When ever I visit my brother and sister-in-law my brother always asks me to bring him a bottle of whiskey and he'll pay me back. If he buys it himself he says his wife nags him so he gets me to. So then he'll pour a drink for himself and me (even though I don't like whiskey) and being stupid I drink it. Then a few mins later he will pour us some more.
Without wanting to sound like I'm making excuses if I were to refuse I know he'd pressure me and say I was no fun etc.
It's also a society issue I think. It's expected you have a drink to toast something. On your birthday, Christmas and the weekend etc. If you don't drink some people seem to think you're a bit weird. Sad but true.
29 months sober is amazing. I'm sure you're much healthier (mentally and physically) because of it. Well done my friend and fellow Brit!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,926
Thanks Jase
Don’t set me off. I’m the forum narcissist! I’ve gone from an obese drunk who sat in the corner of a dull office to being a science teacher/personal trainer. All I quit was quit drinking and plans just fell into place. People now know I don’t drink, and in the case of the boat friend (more of an acquaintance as he didn’t know I don’t drink), all I had to do was say so.
Family and friends, I just said I was drinking too much and became dependent. People were more impressed than anything.
you’ll be fine, Jase. Just get the mindset that you have to stop.
Don’t set me off. I’m the forum narcissist! I’ve gone from an obese drunk who sat in the corner of a dull office to being a science teacher/personal trainer. All I quit was quit drinking and plans just fell into place. People now know I don’t drink, and in the case of the boat friend (more of an acquaintance as he didn’t know I don’t drink), all I had to do was say so.
Family and friends, I just said I was drinking too much and became dependent. People were more impressed than anything.
you’ll be fine, Jase. Just get the mindset that you have to stop.
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