Lie to me, convince me that I've been sick forever
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2021
Posts: 11
Lie to me, convince me that I've been sick forever
Good evening, members of SoberRecovery, and thank you for allowing me to be a part of your community. I hope that I am able to be as supportive, insightful, and strong as all of you have been and I commend you all for embracing your recovery in such a genuine and pure way. I still struggle with the idea of sobriety. The vulnerability, honesty, and trust that comes with knowing there is a brighter tomorrow through sober eyes is such a foreign concept to me. All I know is that I'm tired..and I've been running for far too long.
I am an alcoholic. I said those words for the first time yesterday afternoon and, in that moment, I could breath for the first time in my entire life. However, I've never discriminated in regards to my addictions over the years. Anything that allows me to run away from this reality has always been good enough for me. Until now. Now I know that I deserve better. And somehow, that is the scariest part of all. I'm not sure why this is, but I know one day I'll find the answers. And I won't have to lie to me anymore..
I look forward to all of you being a part of my journey, and me a part of yours. We can't walk this road alone..and we don't have to.
I am an alcoholic. I said those words for the first time yesterday afternoon and, in that moment, I could breath for the first time in my entire life. However, I've never discriminated in regards to my addictions over the years. Anything that allows me to run away from this reality has always been good enough for me. Until now. Now I know that I deserve better. And somehow, that is the scariest part of all. I'm not sure why this is, but I know one day I'll find the answers. And I won't have to lie to me anymore..
I look forward to all of you being a part of my journey, and me a part of yours. We can't walk this road alone..and we don't have to.
Member
Join Date: May 2021
Location: England
Posts: 1,850
Farfromheaven it sounds like you have already done an amazing thing! I know how hard it is to 'admit' things to yourself even when there is no one else listening. I wish you strength and courage in the days ahead. It seems to me that you and I are in the right place here.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Welcome! You have taken a great first step in acknowledging the problem.
Stay close - read and post regularly. Join the May class of newcomers for support:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-part-one.html
Stay close - read and post regularly. Join the May class of newcomers for support:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-part-one.html
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
Welcome to SR FarFromHeaven. The sober life is so much more peaceful, quiet and free of drama. It is a great way to live. You don't have to show your belly and be vulnerable though. Your health and recovery are very personal. Your business. And recovered and healthy you can walk tall and confidently.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 3,514
Welcome to SoberRecovery FarFromHeaven 
Admitting you are an alcoholic is a major step in moving in the right direction. When I admitted to being one I found it a massive weight off my shoulders and hopefully you will too.
Keep reading and posting here at SR. It has helped me turn things around, being in a community with people who understand because they have been there. I hope it can be the same for you.
Admitting you are an alcoholic is a major step in moving in the right direction. When I admitted to being one I found it a massive weight off my shoulders and hopefully you will too.
Keep reading and posting here at SR. It has helped me turn things around, being in a community with people who understand because they have been there. I hope it can be the same for you.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,502
FarFromHeaven, I'm glad you found us and joined us on this journey. Being honest with yourself and your addiction will truly help you to begin to heal. We do understand how hard this is.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Beautiful first post - I found that really moving and I can relate. I find it very difficult to be honest with myself about my addiction but it is a skill that I have been learning and I continue to learn.
Welcome!
xxx
Welcome!
xxx
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2021
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Dee74 
How are you doing, FarFromHeaven?
D
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2021
Posts: 11
Thank you all so much for your warm welcomes and support! I look forward to chatting with you all and working together so that we can achieve our goals of sobriety and continued growth. I've learned so much about myself in such a short period of time and am so excited to have you all be a part of my journey. Such a blessing!
Member
Join Date: May 2021
Location: Upper Chichester, Pennsylvania
Posts: 121
First of all congratulations on reaching a decisive, life- changing realization about yourself. This posting and reading others’ posts is a wonderful aid to staying on the path of recovery.
Because of my own experience I believe you’re in for a very satisfying and enlightening journey that includes occasional moments of true bliss.
Best luck to you on staying the course and successfully negotiating any pitfalls along the way.
Because of my own experience I believe you’re in for a very satisfying and enlightening journey that includes occasional moments of true bliss.
Best luck to you on staying the course and successfully negotiating any pitfalls along the way.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Awesome news on the out-treatment program. I hope you find it really helpful and connect with some people in recovery. It's a great step and it's even greater that you are excited! Glad things are going well for you x
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
