searching

Ive been reading around on these types of sites for a while now and am finally going to post something. I think I have come to my wits end with my drinking. I started drinking when I was in high school with my buddies, not much to do in the rural small town I live in besides drinking. Kept on drinking on the weekends and special occasions up till now. I dont think it was a real problem drinking anymore than the next person that goes out for a few beers with the guys. But then something happend. Im 35 now and its getting out of hand. All my buddies are gone now and I think I relate drinking with the fun we used to have. I still mainly drink on the weekend but its getting worse. Im up to like 2 cases of beer on the weekend and some weekends it is starting to stretch in to Monday or even Tuesday. Normaly I dont feel the urge at all thru the week unless Im drinking to recover from a long bender. But then the weekend hits and Im starting to feel better and it starts all over again. Im starting to miss alot of work and my health is suffering. I have to take blood pressure meds and anxiety meds which I am pretty sure is all caused by my excess drinking. MY wife is now expecting our first child and I dont what my baby to be around drinking as I was when I was a child but its so hard to stop. Well I guess thats about it, Im sorry this was so long. Oh today is my 2nd day without a drink but the weekend is coming up and that scares me. Something that scares me is how I will be without the booze, the last time I went a month with out it I was working out and feeling good but then I got so grouchy that my wife was wanting me to have a beer cause it was so bad. Just wanted to get some of this out and off my chest. Thanks for listening...

hopealwayz

Good thing you are here and posting. Weekends are hard, but you can fill the weekend with other things that do not revolve around drinking. AA meetings are also good because it helps you see there are others going through the same things. Alcohol takes us down but there are many options to help us up. Stick around SR and you will find lots of understanding people and a great amount of support and information.

Hope

Moontime

That was my MO too. Use for 3 or 4 days, recoup for 3 or 4 days, and then that process (progressive) turned into everyday for the last 3 years in my active addiction. If you want to try a new way of life check out an NA or AA meeting. The promise is freedom from active addiction in NA. Alcohol is a drug and just a symptom of the disease of addiction.

sherbear5104

Welcome to SoberRecovery. I can identify with your story. Like Moontime said, it progressively gets worse. I would also use only on the weekends. Then during the week, until it became every day. But I found help in aa. There are many people there who have been where I was, and found a new way of life. They are teaching me how they did it. I just celebrated 7 months on the 1st. I'm not gonna tell you it was easy, but it has been worth the trip. There is alot of support here, feel free to post wherever you feel comfortable. Then check out a meeting. It can help!

Sherry

birdonawire

I am not familiar with where you live, but can you get away for the weekend, maybe to the mountains or a lake to camp or stay in a cabin? Just to get away from your normal drinking venue to have some time to think. I truly believe in the healing power of nature, breath some clean air and think of all the beauty the world has to offer.
It would be a wonderful gift to your new child to live in a sober home.
I am not surprised you feel grouchy without a drink...this is all part of the withdrawal process...it takes time to get the craving out of your system, just like any smoker will tell you. The main thing is...you came here for help. You want to quit drinking and there is tons of support for that. In the mean time, there are lots of triggers for drinking...be aware of what they are and take action to be ready to for them. All the best, Bird

jlo34

Hi Searching,

Tried AA yet? AA is usually the last house on the block - when all else fails. If you seriously want to get your life together, go. Get MEN's phone numbers, use them, go back to more meetings. You mentioned last time exercising made you feel better, so do it. Keep sugary stuff with you for the cravings. Stay away from old places and faces. Go to more meetings. Make more AA phone calls.

If you want to get and stay sober, go to AA. If it doesn't work for you, it's because you were unwilling to allow it to work for you. Simple program for complicated people. Only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking.

Go to a meeting, let us know how it goes.
Love,
Jen

mikee

Searching, welcome! 2days good start! stick with it! your grouchiness is temporary.
My high blood pressure was causing all kinds of benefits on behalf of my bucket loads of beers: anxiety atts/ panick atts / heart fluxes / high E-liver counts/ etc. My Doctor didnt have to ask me if I was still drinking as he filled out 2 more medscripts and increasing the strength of the other 2 so I could spend the rest of the day at the pharmacy then go home to open up the 1st can of beer so I could wash all those pills down!!!! Dont wait as long as I did, quit now! support is here my friend!

CAPTAINZING2000

Searching,

some where along the way we cross over that line. I thought I was maintaining. I'd went over 20 years from my last drunken arrest. I found my self in a drunk tank over 5 years ago. I made up my mind I'd had enough. I've not looked back. It's been easy as far as not drinking. The hard part is dealing with life period. Staying sober, you develop tools from AA how to live a serene life. I don't have any regrets for the decision I've made to come into AA. I've met some of the nicest people in here and most every AA meeting I've been to. I can't say that about some of the bars I've been just hoping to get out with my teeth in my head and my money in my wallet. Keep coming back, it's a lot better way of life

Chris

searching

Thanks all so much, it really helps to know you are out there with me on this. I havent made it to a face to face meeting yet, guess Im just a little scared. I live in a very small town and I remember going to a meeting or two with a friend of mine several years ago and the only ones there were ones that were court orderd to be there or were drunk while they were there. Maybe it has changed since then and I really do want the help...

Debby

Keep up the good work, you have a baby coming and that will help your depression. But it sounds like your wife cant help you. I suggest seeing a counselor or AA, expecially because the new baby changes everyones life. Have you ever tried natural herbs for depression and anxiety they do help alot and they are all natural. Keep working out it helps soooooo much. It gets your natural endorphans kicking in and send a natural chemical to the brain. I love the natural endorphans.
Keep writing here every day.
Debby