BatDad

It sounds like it feels awful, and for that I can certainly say I feel for you and don't blame you in the least for the frustration or desire to feel better, because who wouldn't?

Sometimes when we feel our worst, our body is actually working hardest to heal. It's like this when we have a virus and spike a fever, for example. Fevers can feel like dying but they are actually the body vigorously defending and healing itself. Physical rehab after bad injuries, similar thing, can be excruciating at times, even though it's good and necessary.

Sometimes it helps me mentally/emotionally tolerate discomfort or misery a little bit more if I consciously and repeatedly remind myself of this. Thus feeling bad is not always in and of itself the problem, it's sometimes actually the evidence of the solution in action. That's not to say ignore symptoms that could signal a more serious condition (and, disclaimer, I'm not a doctor), but if the numerous professionals you've seen have ruled out serious causes and are confident this is textbook PAWS, then you should be able to lean some trust onto that and know the symptoms are moving you and your body in the right direction, miserable as they are.

Snowydelrico

With paws I kept telling myself that it will be alright one day and this will pass.
I had the knowledge that paws was something that happened when my brain was repairing its self by adjusting.
So how ever awful it was i knew i was getting better. No pain no gain kind of feeling.
Decades of drinking for a 2 year hangover seemed like a fair deal to me at the time.
i tried to rest and not over do anything, it taught me patience and how to just be.

Paddy123

Hi CBS how are you feeling now? I'm on day 76 and suffering PAWS also. Not feeling good today as had bad sleep and had to go to work. I've been here before and know that the symptoms will fade eventually. I found that eating well, exercise, reduce stress if possible, and good sleep help but as I said above that's not always possible. I was on a low dose of Zoloft for depression/anxiety but finished it and I'm now on Campral. I took Campral before and it helped me so will give it another go. It's a real pain and I feel terrible now (at work) but I know that this will pass. Best of luck with your recovery CBS, Take care and good luck.

CBS62

Thanks everyone for the feed back. It really helps! Snowydelrico and Paddy I am wondering if you would mind sharing what your PAWS symptoms were/are? Mine are so numerous! I will list them here:

Balance issues/rocking sensation/dizziness(almost constant)
Numbness in my heels
Tremor in my body, not visible but feels like a gentle vibration in my lower spine/tailbone mostly
Nystagmus(comes and goes)
Short term memory lapses
Numbness in my right fingers(mostly gone)
Anxiety(much better than a few months ago)
Depression(also better but still lurks)
Nausea and loss of appetite(much better)
Insomnia(much better)
Spinal zaps that go down my arms(better)
Headaches (better)
Irritability in the evenings around "happy hour" time
Tightness/soreness in my jaw(better)
Trouble tracking motion on TV(better)

I think that is it. But I may remember some more that have abated. So things have improved. I am mostly impatient about the dizzy situation. Although the past few mornings it seems to have let up a little. But it eventually kicks in and I am back to feeling like I am on a boat or a dock when I walk, or falling through the bed when I try to go to sleep. Pretty trippy stuff.

Day 132 here!

Introvrtd1

Nice going on day 132 CBS!

It helps to keep hearing us say, “It gets better!” Because it does!

Hang in there, and keep checking in.

Snowydelrico

big change of mood
very irritable
tired
brain fog
depression
unable to rationalise things properly
very uncomfortable in my own skin
then all of a sudden it would just disappear.

The bouts would last for a few days then go away.
The intervals in which they happened lengthened as time went on and the became easier to identify and deal with.

i still have depression bouts that i sometimes wonder if it is paws because some of the symptoms are the same. I felt myself slipping into the depression spiral a week ago but managed to spot the signs and swerve it by talking it through with my partner and not go down the same pathways i usually do.

Snowydelrico

Ride the storm it will pass.
you are doing great.
All the hard work you are putting in isn’t for nothing, its for everything.

if you can't walk then crawl. Just don’t stop. Never give in.

hope you feel more comfortable soon.

(sorry for the two posts, i meant to edit the first one)