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3 years today - no one is coming to save you

Old 04-12-2021, 07:14 PM
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3 years today - no one is coming to save you

Thought I might spend a little time tonight looking through my many old posts, recalling the life of suffering and pain I put myself through before finally getting permanently sober three years ago. But then I came on SR tonight and just didn't want to.

What I want to say is that three years ago my life was teetering on the edge of some very, very dark waters. Without going into tawdry and shameful details, I was just scraping by without major self-imposed tragedy striking down me, or someone I loved. But I had reached that later stage of this hideous habit where my life was merely the anxious time between benders - everything, my health, career, family, friends, spirit, psyche, bank account, liver - every single thing was prostrated before the altar of booze. On a daily, moment to moment basis, I was sacrificing every thing of meaning and value to my relationship with the bottle. My wife didn't trust me, my son didn't trust me and, most crucially, I did not trust my self.

Many of you here have been with me on this path - many on the path at the same place as me, many have aided me in this journey and many others here are still fighting for their own lives - I am grateful in ways I cannot fully express for all of you that make SR what it is. I did the work myself, but this place gave me the footing, the hope, wisdom, advice and lifeline that helped me to finally free myself from the brutal yoke of addiction. Thank you all so much.

And, like many here, I am now an example to those of you still struggling to put the poison down for good. In just three years, all the meaningful and valuable aspects of my life that I had neglected, betrayed, injured and ignored are mine again. In many cases, they are mine for the first time. Career, health, spirit psyche and everything in between. My wife trusts me, I am an example to my children and, most crucially, I finally, finally trust my self with all of my being.

I quoted myself in my post title because it's a way of thinking that was my mantra in early sobriety. It's not meant to nihilistic or negative. It's just a reminder that tomorrow is not promised, that all we need to triumph over the booze is always already within us. It's a phrase I still utter at times to myself and it invigorates me. I am responsible for me, without excuse or blame.

Getting and staying sober takes work. There are days and weeks and even months of just chopping wood, carrying water. And life is still rife with accidents and tragedy. I am still very, very much a work in progress with insecurities, habits and obstacles accumulated during a life of drinking that I have to work on every day. But I am free. My life is fully, completely mine. I am untethered and unbroken. Sober as a mfking bird. Thanks for listening as always.

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Old 04-12-2021, 07:39 PM
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Your post is an inspiration! Thank you for putting it out there, that recovery is possible. Congrats on three years sober and thanks for your message of hope and truth.
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Old 04-12-2021, 08:09 PM
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Congrats on 3 years less

D
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Old 04-12-2021, 09:59 PM
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Congrats on three years Less!! Thanks for being such a positive light here on SR!
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Old 04-12-2021, 10:05 PM
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Yes, recovery is possible. Congratulations on three years.
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Old 04-12-2021, 10:25 PM
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Congratulations Less.

Three years is awesome.

Thanks.
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Old 04-12-2021, 11:37 PM
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Thank you for your post. I read it 3 times. It was just what I needed to read today. Congratulations on 3 years!
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Old 04-13-2021, 01:14 AM
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Yes. The brain damage is real. It takes years to normalize.

We here are lucky to have each other to lean on for ideas and strategies.

The old is new again every day to someone.

If 1 thing you said here helps someone maintain their forever sober way of life...well done.

Booze is poison. I will never again believe the hype.

Thanks.
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Old 04-13-2021, 01:58 AM
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Thanks less and congratulations on 3 years!

Your posts have helped me tremendously and for that I Thank You
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Old 04-13-2021, 04:17 AM
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Originally Posted by lessgravity View Post
Thought I might spend a little time tonight looking through my many old posts, recalling the life of suffering and pain I put myself through before finally getting permanently sober three years ago. But then I came on SR tonight and just didn't want to.

What I want to say is that three years ago my life was teetering on the edge of some very, very dark waters. Without going into tawdry and shameful details, I was just scraping by without major self-imposed tragedy striking down me, or someone I loved. But I had reached that later stage of this hideous habit where my life was merely the anxious time between benders - everything, my health, career, family, friends, spirit, psyche, bank account, liver - every single thing was prostrated before the altar of booze. On a daily, moment to moment basis, I was sacrificing every thing of meaning and value to my relationship with the bottle. My wife didn't trust me, my son didn't trust me and, most crucially, I did not trust my self.

Many of you here have been with me on this path - many on the path at the same place as me, many have aided me in this journey and many others here are still fighting for their own lives - I am grateful in ways I cannot fully express for all of you that make SR what it is. I did the work myself, but this place gave me the footing, the hope, wisdom, advice and lifeline that helped me to finally free myself from the brutal yoke of addiction. Thank you all so much.

And, like many here, I am now an example to those of you still struggling to put the poison down for good. In just three years, all the meaningful and valuable aspects of my life that I had neglected, betrayed, injured and ignored are mine again. In many cases, they are mine for the first time. Career, health, spirit psyche and everything in between. My wife trusts me, I am an example to my children and, most crucially, I finally, finally trust my self with all of my being.

I quoted myself in my post title because it's a way of thinking that was my mantra in early sobriety. It's not meant to nihilistic or negative. It's just a reminder that tomorrow is not promised, that all we need to triumph over the booze is always already within us. It's a phrase I still utter at times to myself and it invigorates me. I am responsible for me, without excuse or blame.

Getting and staying sober takes work. There are days and weeks and even months of just chopping wood, carrying water. And life is still rife with accidents and tragedy. I am still very, very much a work in progress with insecurities, habits and obstacles accumulated during a life of drinking that I have to work on every day. But I am free. My life is fully, completely mine. I am untethered and unbroken. Sober as a mfking bird. Thanks for listening as always.
Thank you for a great post! Just what I need to hear this morning at 3 weeks!
Congratulations on 3 Years
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Old 04-13-2021, 05:01 AM
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Well done, and yes, your story is familiar. But here we are in a better place, and we can appreciate it all the more, considering what we have been through.
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Old 04-13-2021, 05:41 AM
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And we all nod along in agreement....

Congrats on the miracle of three years without a drink.

It's all you, Less.
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Old 04-13-2021, 06:40 AM
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Congratulations on 3 years!
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Old 04-13-2021, 06:48 AM
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THANK YOU and CONGRATULATIONS!

I hear self empowerment and determination.
Yes, Chopping wood and carrying water. That! Yes.

I am so happy to hear that you are happy, LG!
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Old 04-13-2021, 07:40 AM
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Congratulations on 3 years, Less! Awesome post too, full of hope 😃.
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Old 04-13-2021, 07:45 AM
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LG, thanks for the inspiring post. And congratulations on 3 years of recovery.
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Old 04-13-2021, 09:01 AM
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Congratulations on 3 years sober and thanks for a wonderful post 🙏
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Old 04-13-2021, 09:15 AM
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Congratulations, less. I always appreciate your clarity -- it's a gift to our community here.
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Old 04-13-2021, 10:08 AM
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LG-


This is awesome!

You have inspired so many. Your gracefully written words on many of your posts accurately describe what many of us struggle to blurt out.

With that similarity, we hope to be in your situation in the days, weeks, months to come.

It takes more than hope. More than SR. More than AA, RR, or AVRT. It takes work. Determination. Self love.

CONGRATULATIONS on your freedom, LG. So well deserved, and so well written.

my fav post of yours is your guide to moderation. 🥰❤️

Warm Regards,


L

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Old 04-14-2021, 12:40 AM
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Congrats on 3 years.
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