Dealing with life
 

I've been feeling down lately. Energy is off.

I have an eye appointment this morning for a splotch that is growing. Its most likely nothing but the receptionist made it sound a bit concerning. Ill let her worry about it and try to maintain positivity. I've been on Benadryl and Claritin for a breathing issue. The breathing issue has not resolved. I've talked with a nurse and took her recommendations. Going to the doc is the next stop. After my eye appointment this morning and after dealing with some work stuff Ill make an appointment for this breathing issue. I think the Benadryl is really ******* with me. Also, a rash has formed on both hands. I cant tell what this is from? So, I've been dealing with some stuff and I am not feeling inner happiness lately. Such is life. I don't have to be happy all the time. I don't like feeling this way and I have been applying the "fake it until you make it method." Its not working. I need a new method right now. I am grateful for all I have. I just have to walk through this funk right now. The sun is shining somewhere and will light up my brain soon enough.

I am sober.

Tis all.

I skipped ahead to read the last line, sometimes I cheat like that ;)

Yeah I know the feeling - life doesn't suddenly become a golden pathway of ease and comfort once we get sober. (Not that you don't know that, I'm just thinking of this myself). The hard, real work of dealing with our accumulated habits, obstacles and just the tragic accidents of every day life still present themselves on a daily basis. As many have said, and I've come to know - the real work starts once we get sober. Grateful and honored to be doing that work today. And happy to be here with you Mizz. Congrats on your continued sobriety.

I have a couple decades on you so I've got all kinds of physical complaints! Stuff keeps breaking or wearing out, but a lot less so since I'm not the clumsy drinker adding poison to the mix. The eyes...don't know what you mean by "splotch..." but vision floaters and stuff seem to be age-related and unavoidable. I hope that's all it is.

Hang on to the sober part. That's the most important thing.

((Mizz)) :hug:

Maybe contentment is a better goal than happiness. I consider myself happy if I'm content.

Splotch. A dark brown spot that is growing and getting darker.

I guess I am noticing that this vehicle I am in is starting to break down a bit. I need a tune up and a tire rotation. Possibly some new wind shield wipers (eye glasses) and fluids (bought some stuff to juice. I should probably get on it!)

Okay.
A milder form of happiness.
Im sort of like the weather right now.....Foggy with a chance of sun :)

Sorry Mizz. I will say that Benadryl is what some parents give to their young children to help them sleep. I know it makes me extremely drowsy. I also take Claritin which doesn’t have the same effect. Hope you feel better soon. I woke today with a lot of fatigue and dreading my work day.

At least we’re sober.

We will get through this, BABM. Its cloudy with a BIG chance of sunshine today. One foot in front of the other.

Since I quit drinking I have developed eczema and pretty bad arthritis in my hands. The arthritis really affects me because I work with my hands doing marine canvas which involves marking, cutting, sewing, pulling, stretching etc. I have an autoimmune disease which can cause all sorts of stuff so it is what it is.
What I don't have is a hangover on top of dealing with these issues. For this I am grateful.

When I am down about it I reflect on life in general which is Much better since I am sober. I have so much good in my life but when we are down it is hard to see.

The sun is always shining, even on cloudy days. We just have to climb above the clouds to see it.

I hope you find relief soon

Mizz, I think it's a very good plan to get your eye checked out. And, yes, for sure, aging is not fun but it is what it is. I try to just deal with one thing at a time if possible, so I don't get overwhelmed and depressed. And, as Driguy said, it's important to consider contentment. :)

Sorry to hear that you're down a little, Mizz. You are always so upbeat and energetic, but it's a cycle we go through - one of the many rhythms of life. It will get better for you too. As far as ailments, I have had allergies, asthma and skin sensitivities my entire life so it's just one of the things I had to learn to deal with early on. The madness was drinking beer on top of it, to which I am allergic to most of the ingredients. I had to stop running, which I loved, when the damage to the meniscus became too great, especially after having both knees scoped 20 years ago, and now theres some arthritis, so I turned to cycling. Arthritis in the left hand from the motorcycle clutch, got a bike with a lighter clutch, still riding and grateful. Ha ha. And so it goes. We just have to keep adapting and moving.

Bigger lessons also from spending months each year in the Philippines, which is a poor, developing country with shorter lifespans and rough conditions. Life is really tough there, but most people seem happy despite having almost nothing. It really changes one's perspective. Most of the world has far less material wealth than we do in the West, but more spiritual wealth. Wealth from connections with others, the land, nature, etc. Fewer goals. More in the moment. Now, like them, I consider it a good day when I wake up in the morning and have food to eat. Very grateful. Especially if I can still ride my bike and work in the yard. Talk to a friend or neighbor. The simple things. Happiness comes easier with age and sobriety, perhaps because we have fewer expectations.

I hope you have a joyous day moving from the damp, foggy mystery of the morning into the bright warmth of the afternoon! Maybe there's a metaphor in there somewhere, like the great one Fish told.

Mizz - Sometimes the discontent comes out of nowhere & for no major reason. I usually am able to talk myself out of it by saying how overall lucky I am - but it doesn't always work. (I used to hate it when my mom would remind me that I had nothing to complain about - which invalidated my feelings.) As advbike said, it's a cycle we go through - the rhythm of life. I hope you'll feel more optimistic soon.
Let us know how the eye dr appointment goes.

Hang in there, Mizz! I have a few health issues of my own I've been putting off since this covid madness started, including growing cataracts in both eyes and some annoying teeth grief. I really need to face these I know, maybe after I get that vaccine that's going around!

I hope that you can find out whats going on and feel better soon Mizz :)

D

Dealing with mysterious health conditions is the worst. I hope you find out soon what these things are and can be in a better mood, Mizz.

I hope your appointment with the opthalmologist goes well Mizz.

Maybe the benadryl is messing with you. Rash? Mood? I'm not a doctor tho.

Good you are seeing doctors to get it sorted. You'll feel better when you know what's going on. Awful, not knowing.

It will pass Mizz.

🌞 ☀️ ☀️ ☀️ ☀️

Steely, just watched the NSW flooding on BBC News. Wow.

Hope you and family are safe and that the rains let up.

UPDATE:
Its a benign tumor. YAY! So that is a positive.
Also, all the 40-43 year old claim the writing on labels have gotten smaller. Reading glasses here I come! GOOO ME!

The breathing issue is next to tackle. I've really been struggling with it and it was all of a sudden, at 5 am or so a few weeks back, I noticed that I was having a hard time breathing. I'm not big on doctors but I am ALL for finding out what the problem is since it is not going away with all these OTC drugs. Is repeating yourself an age related thing too? Sorry guys....

I'm a person who is having to do all these things that are foreign to me. Doctors, over the counter drugs, reading glasses. What's next? Grey hair is next. Sometimes I check to see if any have surfaced. Its hard to tell because of my long golden blonde tresses ;) JK....not really......jk.. not really tho. This aging thing is BIZZARO! ;)

Thanks for checking in all. Today went well. I am okay. Content. Drinking soup. Remembering not to sweat the small things......Like my cat who hates our new area rug and decided to mark again! She needs therapy. Anyone know of a good feline therapist?

Just catching up on your thread Mizz, so I’m glad you got good news. I hear ya on the aging thing. I may have to investigate bifocals, but we will see. What I like about our fitness thread and our sobriety is we are no longer speeding up the process with alcohol. That’s a big plus. Hang in there!

Mizz, I am glad it is a benign tumor! As for your cat if she has marked things repeatedly think about putting her on Prozac. My cat had an issue with marking things like pillows and clean laundry! The Prozac has cured him!