Day 4 trying to win the thought life
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 23
Day 4 trying to win the thought life
I am really trying to work on my thought life. That is where it all starts for me. I find myself automatically thinking about how I can sneak around and drink or drug. It just happens. Then when I catch myself, i try to cast that imagination down. I try to purposely think about something else.
I am trying to purposely think on things and not let the idle mind allow these demonic drinking drugging thoughts to come in.
I am on day 4, and I usually slip around two weeks in. I just don't care anymore and allow those thoughts to take over.
I read it helps to have a 'pattern interrupt'. In other words, if the environment a person normally gets tempted in is approximated, then the subconscious mind goes on autopilot. It trumps willpower.
Problem is, I sit in my recliner and view social media or videos and it happens. Right now, I am typing this post. Not sure if that is a good pattern interrupt cuz i am still in a recliner.
I just don't want to mess up again. I need to figure out how to beat this thing to the punch.
I am trying to purposely think on things and not let the idle mind allow these demonic drinking drugging thoughts to come in.
I am on day 4, and I usually slip around two weeks in. I just don't care anymore and allow those thoughts to take over.
I read it helps to have a 'pattern interrupt'. In other words, if the environment a person normally gets tempted in is approximated, then the subconscious mind goes on autopilot. It trumps willpower.
Problem is, I sit in my recliner and view social media or videos and it happens. Right now, I am typing this post. Not sure if that is a good pattern interrupt cuz i am still in a recliner.
I just don't want to mess up again. I need to figure out how to beat this thing to the punch.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,426
I found no, spoken or not, was pretty effective 
Think of these thoughts as a noisy baby - you can't reason with a baby.
wait it out and in time it will tire itself out.
If you have things that trigger the thoughts - favourite places, songs, times...try consciously to vary and change your routine for a while.
Above all - you are in control here.
No thought can ambush you, hold you down and pour alcohol down your throat.
For you to drink again you have to cooperate with the thoughts.
Deny them that cooperation.
D
Think of these thoughts as a noisy baby - you can't reason with a baby.
wait it out and in time it will tire itself out.
If you have things that trigger the thoughts - favourite places, songs, times...try consciously to vary and change your routine for a while.
Above all - you are in control here.
No thought can ambush you, hold you down and pour alcohol down your throat.
For you to drink again you have to cooperate with the thoughts.
Deny them that cooperation.
D
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,496
I also say 'no' to myself and it does help stop the negative thoughts.
Also, meditation could be a very effective tool for you. There are lots of great meditation sequences on youtube. Jon Kabat-Zinn is awesome.
Also, meditation could be a very effective tool for you. There are lots of great meditation sequences on youtube. Jon Kabat-Zinn is awesome.
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 23
good question. i believe it would be thoughts, that then lead to the feelings? the thoughts to drink and drug come up, then i may feel a snapshot of what it feels like to use. Then i realize i am in that moment and try to change my mind.
I guess the thoughts trigger the cravings..... or the strong desire.
Sometimes before i fall into the trap, i start sneezing a whole bunch. never figured that out. but when that happens, it is usually too late in my thinking process. i have already made up my mind at that point.
I guess the thoughts trigger the cravings..... or the strong desire.
Sometimes before i fall into the trap, i start sneezing a whole bunch. never figured that out. but when that happens, it is usually too late in my thinking process. i have already made up my mind at that point.
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Posts: 23
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I found no, spoken or not, was pretty effective
Think of these thoughts as a noisy baby - you can't reason with a baby.
D
Think of these thoughts as a noisy baby - you can't reason with a baby.
D
I am going to try to distract myself for the time frame i go through it next time. maybe go for a walk, or play some online chess or something. thanks!
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,384
Those thoughts really to seem to have a life of their own, don't they. But they're just thoughts and they can't make you drink if you know you're sober now. Day 4 is still early and we all remember how crazy things seemed then, just know that your job right now is to stay sober no matter what, get to day 5 and so on, and gradually if you keep going you'll be able to find yourself again. And you might try looking into meditation btw, I know everybody says that now but learning how to sit for 15 or 20 minutes alone with those lively thoughts of yours, learning how they work, all their little tricks, maybe how to steer them around a little, that can really help a person in just about any life pursuit. A meditation book that helped me tremendously and isn't all new-age mystical weird is 10% Happier by Dan Harris the ABC journalist.
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Sometimes before i fall into the trap, i start sneezing a whole bunch. never figured that out. but when that happens, it is usually too late in my thinking process. i have already made up my mind at that point.
There's a million little moments between the initial thought to drink, and the final decision to drink,. and a million more little moments between deciding to drink and obtaining something to drink, and then a million more moments before we pour it down our throat....
Any one of those million million little moments is a chance to recalibrate and say
'you know what? that's not what I want at all...'
Our addiction doesn't like you or I to know that, cos it prefers us giving up as soon as we have the thought.I was still in early recovery when I had a horrible day.
I walked to the local liquor store about 10 mins away and bought booze.
On the way back I was thinking of this place and my friends here and how much I wanted a new life. I dumped the bottle, unopened into a roadside bin before I got home.
Just because you've never done that before doesn't mean you can't do it now.
Its never too late to back out on a bad decision.
D
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Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 919
In those first months I literally would not leave my house if I had a desire to drink. For real, like I wouldn't go near a liquor store. Ok, you got the urge tonight? You get a pizza and you get netflix and you stay put. I'm not saying you have to be a shut in, but I am saying physically keep yourself away from temptation. I remember it was always a relief when it hit 11pm or so when the last liquor store closed because then there was NO chance i could get liquor that day.
And to add, if that sounds grim, it WILL pass when it becomes a routine. You will pass two weeks, and then two months. And then you will still get urges but they wont be so strong and you can recall all the other times you fought the urge and won.
And to add, if that sounds grim, it WILL pass when it becomes a routine. You will pass two weeks, and then two months. And then you will still get urges but they wont be so strong and you can recall all the other times you fought the urge and won.
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lessgravity reminded me of a quote that would have gone well with my million million choices post
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.
Viktor Frankl.
use the space. Its never too late
D
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.
Viktor Frankl.
use the space. Its never too late
D
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Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: NC
Posts: 5,157
Changing routines helped me early on. Do different things at certain times to rewire my brain out of old habits.
When the cravings, thoughts do arise I shut them down quickly. Don't let them hang around.
My AV: "what a crappy day, maybe a drink will help"
Me: well that won't work because, I don't drink.
If it tries to hang around after that I play it forward to me stumbling around slamming beers feeling like s%^& wishing I could stop.
That awful taste when you've had too many but not enough yet you keep slamming em. The horrible next morning, day if it was a long night before. The loss of sober time I have built. The shame, guilt and regret I will feel if I give in.
Whatever it takes to not drink
When the cravings, thoughts do arise I shut them down quickly. Don't let them hang around.
My AV: "what a crappy day, maybe a drink will help"
Me: well that won't work because, I don't drink.
If it tries to hang around after that I play it forward to me stumbling around slamming beers feeling like s%^& wishing I could stop.
That awful taste when you've had too many but not enough yet you keep slamming em. The horrible next morning, day if it was a long night before. The loss of sober time I have built. The shame, guilt and regret I will feel if I give in.
Whatever it takes to not drink
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Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Alcoholics must learn how to control their behavior. You may or may not be able to control your thoughts, but you always have control over your behavior. This is hard during the early cravings phase of recovery. You bull your way through them and tend to focus attention on the cravings, which is probably not the best thing to do, but many of us have handled the craving phase that way.
When the craving phase ends, the most important part of long term sobriety comes next. It's the thinking part. It's far less annoying, but every bit as dangerous. Humans are capable of the most ludicrous forms of self deception. The very gift that sets us apart from the lower apes, is also our own worst enemy, our ability to think and feed ourselves the most foolish of information sometimes makes me wonder how our species managed to survive at all.
Have you got a plan for recovery? Does it include "DON'T DRINK" in capital letters in several places? This is an imperative. You can face all the thoughts you have, no matter how sensible or foolish, but you must BEHAVE according to the imperative. Behavior is separate from thinking. It is action, not thoughts. It's like night and day, and you can never let a thought or even a well thought out line of logic take priority over this one necessary decision in recovery behavior.
In many life situations, you can get by with substandard behavior, but not in battling alcoholism. Your behavior is everything. Most alcoholics need to work on their thinking skills too, and I agree that's highly important, but the most perfect thinking alcoholic, will be undone when he does not use the correct recovery behavior as his final authority.
When the craving phase ends, the most important part of long term sobriety comes next. It's the thinking part. It's far less annoying, but every bit as dangerous. Humans are capable of the most ludicrous forms of self deception. The very gift that sets us apart from the lower apes, is also our own worst enemy, our ability to think and feed ourselves the most foolish of information sometimes makes me wonder how our species managed to survive at all.
Have you got a plan for recovery? Does it include "DON'T DRINK" in capital letters in several places? This is an imperative. You can face all the thoughts you have, no matter how sensible or foolish, but you must BEHAVE according to the imperative. Behavior is separate from thinking. It is action, not thoughts. It's like night and day, and you can never let a thought or even a well thought out line of logic take priority over this one necessary decision in recovery behavior.
In many life situations, you can get by with substandard behavior, but not in battling alcoholism. Your behavior is everything. Most alcoholics need to work on their thinking skills too, and I agree that's highly important, but the most perfect thinking alcoholic, will be undone when he does not use the correct recovery behavior as his final authority.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by Dee74
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.
Viktor Frankl.
use the space. Its never too late
D
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