Wanting to Assist Newbies to Recovery
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2021
Location: Melbourne Victoria
Posts: 2
Wanting to Assist Newbies to Recovery
Hi there,
I am just over 9 years sober and I can still remember posting on here back in 2005 when I was struggling to get free of the hold alcohol had over me.
I'd have a black out binge and drag myself to work the next day hungover, anxious and crying, desperate for someone to offer me a magic solution.
Well, here I am, posting on here reaching out to others offering hope, solace and sanity to my fellow alcoholics suffering from the madness that is alcoholism.
I got sober on the morning of the 3rd of December 2011 when I was just 33 years old. With cuts all up my arms from self harm, and a mouth that tasted like tobacco and very very cheap wine,
I walked to my university and went to see the psychologist. I was a mess. Then a few days later I went to the doctor and got blood work done both for my physical and sexual health.
I was very lucky that after the massive pounding I had given to my body that I was still healthy (albeit dehydrated).
Then the long journey of recovery began for me.
I went to a psychologist twice a week as an outpatient, then once a week for three years.
I coupled this will twice or three times a week AA meetings.
I never got a sponsor for any length of time and I only completed 5 of the 12 steps because I came to the realization that I didn't agree wholesale with the entirety of the program.
I took what I needed from AA which was the narrative therapy that was very helpful to me when I felt my head would explode from intrusive thoughts, flashbacks and physical cravings.
Somehow I got through it long enough for my sobriety to stick. Then I kind of became obsessed with getting sober. I read all the studies including the very illuminating orange papers that put the spiritual side of recovery from a moral shortcoming to that of a physical and in many ways hereditary one, which mine certainly was as my father and uncle had the exact same binge drinking problem that I had/have.
Anyway, I am here now to help you.
If you want it. I can't say that I know exactly how to get sober just what worked for me.
Sobriety I have learnt can be an extremely isolating experience and to be honest it can be a total mind ****.
That is, if you have no one to talk to about it or any kind of verbal release from the thoughts.
Getting sober was the hardest thing I have ever had to content with but I know that if I didn't get my **** together I would be either dead, or in prison from manslaughter as I used to drink drive often.
I am not proud of my drinking history and if there is anything good that can come from this it is that I am alive today and can help people struggling and suffering from the grip that is addiction.
I know the agony of a hangover like it was yesterday, the memories of those times can never ever be forgotten and I think of those times often. The memories are a bitter sweet gift as it makes me grateful that I will never forget and therefore never repeat my actions.
Please feel free to ask me anything or to share your story as I will be reading the posts on here and offering my help.
I am just over 9 years sober and I can still remember posting on here back in 2005 when I was struggling to get free of the hold alcohol had over me.
I'd have a black out binge and drag myself to work the next day hungover, anxious and crying, desperate for someone to offer me a magic solution.
Well, here I am, posting on here reaching out to others offering hope, solace and sanity to my fellow alcoholics suffering from the madness that is alcoholism.
I got sober on the morning of the 3rd of December 2011 when I was just 33 years old. With cuts all up my arms from self harm, and a mouth that tasted like tobacco and very very cheap wine,
I walked to my university and went to see the psychologist. I was a mess. Then a few days later I went to the doctor and got blood work done both for my physical and sexual health.
I was very lucky that after the massive pounding I had given to my body that I was still healthy (albeit dehydrated).
Then the long journey of recovery began for me.
I went to a psychologist twice a week as an outpatient, then once a week for three years.
I coupled this will twice or three times a week AA meetings.
I never got a sponsor for any length of time and I only completed 5 of the 12 steps because I came to the realization that I didn't agree wholesale with the entirety of the program.
I took what I needed from AA which was the narrative therapy that was very helpful to me when I felt my head would explode from intrusive thoughts, flashbacks and physical cravings.
Somehow I got through it long enough for my sobriety to stick. Then I kind of became obsessed with getting sober. I read all the studies including the very illuminating orange papers that put the spiritual side of recovery from a moral shortcoming to that of a physical and in many ways hereditary one, which mine certainly was as my father and uncle had the exact same binge drinking problem that I had/have.
Anyway, I am here now to help you.
If you want it. I can't say that I know exactly how to get sober just what worked for me.
Sobriety I have learnt can be an extremely isolating experience and to be honest it can be a total mind ****.
That is, if you have no one to talk to about it or any kind of verbal release from the thoughts.
Getting sober was the hardest thing I have ever had to content with but I know that if I didn't get my **** together I would be either dead, or in prison from manslaughter as I used to drink drive often.
I am not proud of my drinking history and if there is anything good that can come from this it is that I am alive today and can help people struggling and suffering from the grip that is addiction.
I know the agony of a hangover like it was yesterday, the memories of those times can never ever be forgotten and I think of those times often. The memories are a bitter sweet gift as it makes me grateful that I will never forget and therefore never repeat my actions.
Please feel free to ask me anything or to share your story as I will be reading the posts on here and offering my help.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 2,661
Hi Dove...
Thanks for offering to help....was here a number of times as far back as 2007...was a mess all the way to 58 days ago....
I keep coming here for support and there has been some wonderful people here providing that..
Thank you again...
Ive already been told before but can you tell me again that it’s going to get better? Paws has been rough the past few days....The last time was around 30 days....this time nearly 60.....
I know its still early recovery but I need to constantly hear some positive reassurance...
Thanks for offering to help....was here a number of times as far back as 2007...was a mess all the way to 58 days ago....
I keep coming here for support and there has been some wonderful people here providing that..
Thank you again...
Ive already been told before but can you tell me again that it’s going to get better? Paws has been rough the past few days....The last time was around 30 days....this time nearly 60.....
I know its still early recovery but I need to constantly hear some positive reassurance...
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
Originally Posted by Introvrtd1 
Hi Dove...
Thanks for offering to help....was here a number of times as far back as 2007...was a mess all the way to 58 days ago....
I keep coming here for support and there has been some wonderful people here providing that..
Thank you again...
Ive already been told before but can you tell me again that it’s going to get better? Paws has been rough the past few days....The last time was around 30 days....this time nearly 60.....
I know its still early recovery but I need to constantly hear some positive reassurance...
Thanks for offering to help....was here a number of times as far back as 2007...was a mess all the way to 58 days ago....
I keep coming here for support and there has been some wonderful people here providing that..
Thank you again...
Ive already been told before but can you tell me again that it’s going to get better? Paws has been rough the past few days....The last time was around 30 days....this time nearly 60.....
I know its still early recovery but I need to constantly hear some positive reassurance...
I would wake up and announce to the air what I was grateful for and continually think of things that were positive even though I felt like absolute garbage. I was not okay and I did not think I was ever going to be okay. Days felt terribly long. I struggled to care for myself and spent a lot of time on the couch. I Tried to stick to a schedule of normalcy by running in the early am when no one was out. It was tough going. I had quite a few fulI blown anxiety episodes. It was really really bad. I got through that time with the help of the forum, prayer and just sitting through the funk.
You are doing this. Good for you. Keep going. You will move past this and you will be better.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 2,661
Originally Posted by Mizz;[url=tel:7598700
7598700[/url]]I was 2 months sober and was put into a 21 day quarantine. I went off the deep end with anxiety, what I thought was PAWS, depression, restlessness, ETC. It was a really bad time. I applied the "fake it until you make it" method. I spent a lot of time on here.
I would wake up and announce to the air what I was grateful for and continually think of things that were positive even though I felt like absolute garbage. I was not okay and I did not think I was ever going to be okay. Days felt terribly long. I struggled to care for myself and spent a lot of time on the couch. I Tried to stick to a schedule of normalcy by running in the early am when no one was out. It was tough going. I had quite a few fulI blown anxiety episodes. It was really really bad. I got through that time with the help of the forum, prayer and just sitting through the funk.
You are doing this. Good for you. Keep going. You will move past this and you will be better.
I would wake up and announce to the air what I was grateful for and continually think of things that were positive even though I felt like absolute garbage. I was not okay and I did not think I was ever going to be okay. Days felt terribly long. I struggled to care for myself and spent a lot of time on the couch. I Tried to stick to a schedule of normalcy by running in the early am when no one was out. It was tough going. I had quite a few fulI blown anxiety episodes. It was really really bad. I got through that time with the help of the forum, prayer and just sitting through the funk.
You are doing this. Good for you. Keep going. You will move past this and you will be better.
I can totally relate and understand! I beginning to see clearly by yours and other experiences here!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 637
Welcome back
It's great to have a person that has time in recovery and now is looking to give back. Today I work on day 290. Alcohol and recreational drugs brought me to the path of recovery. I too got sober in 2012 no alcohol no drugs. I too was doing the steps of AA prior to 2012. Nothing wrong with AA just wasn't sticking with me at the time. I haven't touched alcohol or illegal street drug's since 2012. But over the time I began abusing my prescription opiates as a cruch and had to be honest with myself that is was a problem. So I recommitted myself and today I work on day 290 no alcohol, street drug's or prescription opiates. Really focusing on my mental health and self care has helped me with cravings or self medicating my underlying mental health issues. I also just found a place that has adopted some if the 12 steps and traditions but for prescription addiction. It's called PA . Enough of me good to have you posting
It's great to have a person that has time in recovery and now is looking to give back. Today I work on day 290. Alcohol and recreational drugs brought me to the path of recovery. I too got sober in 2012 no alcohol no drugs. I too was doing the steps of AA prior to 2012. Nothing wrong with AA just wasn't sticking with me at the time. I haven't touched alcohol or illegal street drug's since 2012. But over the time I began abusing my prescription opiates as a cruch and had to be honest with myself that is was a problem. So I recommitted myself and today I work on day 290 no alcohol, street drug's or prescription opiates. Really focusing on my mental health and self care has helped me with cravings or self medicating my underlying mental health issues. I also just found a place that has adopted some if the 12 steps and traditions but for prescription addiction. It's called PA . Enough of me good to have you posting
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2021
Location: Melbourne Victoria
Posts: 2
I hear ya Introvrted1,
It came in ebbs and flows for me. The worst was definitely the first year. But what really helped for me is to let others in recovery know what you are going through.
I used to sob and cry and just tell the whole rotten truth in my AA meetings. I wouldn't hold anything back and this was also appreciated by the other members in the group.
It DOES get better. That I am absolutely certain of.
The longer my brain was without alcohol the more my sobriety stuck and my brain got a really great chance to rewire itself.
I used to imagine my brain getting healthier and not soaked in alcohol and this in turn made me even like myself a little more (self hatred and alcoholics goes hand in hand).
Don't be too hard on yourself, what you are going through is absolutely like changing. It's a hard slog. But please know that you do not have to go it alone.
You realized that you do have a problem and you are taking actual physical steps to save your own life.
Sobriety is a gift that is not easily won, but I it can be made easier if we are gentle with ourselves, reach out for help and let it out.
I wish you the very best in your recovery and I am so very proud of all that you have achieved so far.
It came in ebbs and flows for me. The worst was definitely the first year. But what really helped for me is to let others in recovery know what you are going through.
I used to sob and cry and just tell the whole rotten truth in my AA meetings. I wouldn't hold anything back and this was also appreciated by the other members in the group.
It DOES get better. That I am absolutely certain of.
The longer my brain was without alcohol the more my sobriety stuck and my brain got a really great chance to rewire itself.
I used to imagine my brain getting healthier and not soaked in alcohol and this in turn made me even like myself a little more (self hatred and alcoholics goes hand in hand).
Don't be too hard on yourself, what you are going through is absolutely like changing. It's a hard slog. But please know that you do not have to go it alone.
You realized that you do have a problem and you are taking actual physical steps to save your own life.
Sobriety is a gift that is not easily won, but I it can be made easier if we are gentle with ourselves, reach out for help and let it out.
I wish you the very best in your recovery and I am so very proud of all that you have achieved so far.
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