Backtogood

I think as we move farther along in sobriety, we can add activities that were once triggers. Personally, i just need more time. I know for a fact camping this summer is going to be challenging. A totally different experience than Any other time since my childhood. But just because it will be different, doesn't mean it will be bad. I am actually assuming it will be a better experience.

Anna

That was the hardest time of the day for me, too, and I found that creating a new routine helped me so much. Day 11 is great.

OverthePanic

Your doing so good BTG Day 11 is fantastic!!

Mizz

Having a schedule/ structure was the key for me. I made Hot tea after work a priority. A bath. Dinner. SR. Attended meetings in the beginning. Bedtime at a certain hour. The structure/ schedule was kept even if my thoughts were not on board. Eventually my brain got adjusted and the schedule/ structure is normal now. Good for you! Keep on moving forward.

GerandTwine

Hi BTG,

What is your plan for the future use of alcohol?

GT

Backtogood

GT- I have avoided this thread all week because I don't have a simple, straight forward, answer to your question. I been to the meetings, I've read the books, I've been through counseling. I have lived my life through a haze of alcohol abuse for 20 years and I want a change. I'm making that happen one day at a time. Everytime I fall, I get back up And try again, learning from my mistakes and altering my future course. Ultimately, no matter what tools I have in place, I have to choose not to drink. Play the tape forward, look at past posts, reflect.

Backtogood

Checking in. Day 20 Feeling good. Making sure I keep busy, but also allow time to just relax. I find I have more energy in the mornings, but hit a slump mid afternoon. Also some days I'm really motivated And some days I'm just tired. I try and listen to my body and keep to a schedule every evening, as to not let AV thoughts in. But the thoughts are there, I don't let them close, but they do sneak in and mock me. It is hard having alcohol around me everyday, but it also serves the purpose of reminding me why I don't drink, if that makes sense. Anyways, onward!

Grateful09

Great work! I can relate to the situation of hubby having alcohol around. Just went through another Friday night that way, him drinking and me doing my structured plan. The one saving grace is his choice is beer, which I don't and never have liked. But it also makes sense to me that even though drinking in the house while you are not drinking can be hard, it can also serve to remind why you don't drink. It does that for me too. Great job on 20 days!

Hevyn

20 days - how wonderful!

phoebe64

I relate BTG. When my husband is drinking, I really notice how his ability to make sense degrades as the empties accumulate. That’s always a good reminder that I don’t want to be like that. But, it’s also frustrating to hang out with him when he’s drinking and I’m not.

Backtogood

yes, you can definitely recognize the changes in personality as the drinks go down. I can hang with him until he starts getting his buzz on, then I'm out. Sometimes I just go to the bedroom, no matter what the time. Last night he got sloppy and I felt so relieved that I was sober and not acting like that. It kinda does irritate me that he continues to offer me drinks when he pours. Yesterday was a margarita and it was a nice day and sounded refreshing! I almost made a virgin one, but decided not to, seemed like a risk better not taken.

dwtbd

Does he offer drinks because he thinks you are on a break , or he would rather you didn’t quit ? I know his beast is more comfortable if you are a drinker , but what is your plan for future alcohol use ? Are you on a break or have you decided to quit ?

Anna

Day 20 is great, BTG. I think listening to your body and making sure to take time to relax are two important things that you're doing to help your recovery.

JamesSquire

Sipping, made me a functional drunk. Got my work done but was plastered at the end of the day. Not my best effort.

Good to see you're moving forward BTG, keep the fight going.

advbike

I think you're doing great BTG, especially when your spouse drinks in front of you. I had a situation like that before and it was very difficult for me. Keep up the good work, and keep doing it your way. We are all different and have to find what works best for our situation.

Backtogood

we were drinking biggie for 20 years And the transition has been challenging for our relationship. I think we've finally found a balance, but of course he wants me to drink with him. Partly at of his own guilt that he's drinking in front of me and party cause he wants his drinking buddy back.

phoebe64

When I’ve slipped (a couple of times) since January, when I started my most recent sober effort, my husband seemed so happy to be with me. He was more cheerful and present. He definitely misses his drinking buddy. Sigh.

Backtogood

Update- so after 31 days sober, I drank for 4 days. It didn't mix well with my Antidepressants and it was a horrible experience. Now I'm 12 days sober Again, feeling great. Had thoughts of drinking yesterday, so I'm here reading and posting here making myself more accountable. Texted a friend who has also quit drinking and we talked. Things are good, overall. My blood pressure (my doc almost put me on meds) is back to below normal, my liver panel is almost normal, I've lost 14 pounds, my dry skin is way better, i sleep at night, my anxiety is manageable, my relationships are healthier. So no bads, all positives. Except the whole I'm an addict thing.

Hodd

I’d focus on the blood pressure thing. Tablets have awful side effects on their own, and when they interact which any other meds a person may need in future, it’s crazy. My dad used to take fluid reducing tablets which affected his blood pressure tablets, and when he fell over because the tablets had sent his blood pressure too low, his blood thinning tablets meant he bled and bled. The doctors would’ve spent decades getting his meds right - but he died!

Drinking will increase your blood pressure, so it’s in your hands to sort it without tablets.

I talk about myself too much on here, so this one more won’t hurt - I recorded something like 170/90 blood pressure when I first changed my ways. That’s disgraceful, and a doctor would’ve had me on tablets. I lost the alcohol and the weight, and now my blood pressure is perfect, sometimes too low!

You’re doing OK, but these bursts of drinking again are a huge problem. You should be cherishing your sobriety like nothing else. Avoid whatever situation that causes you to drink and take responsibility for your own health. A lot of us have been there, and one day it just clicks.