Originally Posted by biminiblue

My cats were a huge part of why I got sober.

So Joey, I lost one cat while I was still drinking. I feel bad for him that his last years were spent with smelly, self-absorbed me.

I got sober and four years later I lost another cat. (Both had CKD, both needed special care at the end.) I felt bad that he died of course but I felt really good about Myself that I had given him four years of a not-smelly self-absorbed me. When I drank I managed to feed them and clean the litter box daily and give them their meds but I was usually pretty out of it in general and did not have a lot of tenderness to give because I was too wrapped up in my own misery/drink/feel better/hungover/misery/repeat cycle.

Now my third (and LAST!) cat is winding down. I think she's around 20 years old. When she goes it will be devastating but every day I talk to her, sit with her several times a day, and any time she comes to me I stop what I'm doing to just love on her. I'll remember that as her last days. I've done absolutely everything I can do to show her unselfish love, just as she's done for me for 20 years.

It would have been horrible if I had died of my alcoholism or a heart attack or something due to my drinking and left these cats alone. That was a very real possibility. I would wake at 3AM daily with a racing pounding heart due to drinking. Terrified.


If you are doing a taper, do you have a set plan? Like it shouldn't take more than three or four days to completely quit even if you're doing a taper without medical help...don't let this decision drag on for weeks until he does die and then you'll likely use that as a reason to drink heavily. Not only that, but don't forget cats have nine lives. I don't know how many times I've thought, "This is it!" and my cat rallies for another day.

What's your plan for drinking today?

Originally Posted by Joey21

thank you so much, I will do that

Originally Posted by Surrendered19

You can absolutely beat this thing Joey. It does end up controlling every aspect of our lives and that is an awful reality. When you are ready you can get on top of this problem. Keep posting and letting us know how things are going.

Originally Posted by Joey21

thank you for your experience and advice. I don't really have an exact set plan in place but I'm just trying to maintain enough so I don't have the violent shakes so I can be there for my cat. I know what you're saying but trust me my cats don't go without anything and maybe they do know when I'm not in a great state but they always know how much they are loved. And with my one cat sick there's no way I'm leaving him. I really hope the tapering works and if it doesn't then I'll have to reassess and go from there. I'm so sorry about your cats. It's so hard losing a member of your family because to me my cats are my family. Not doing so great today had a few too many. But I'm sure I'll get back on track tomorrow again. Just been a rough day

Originally Posted by biminiblue

See, but this is the problem.

It's been seven days since your first post.


Seven days. You're still drinking and still drinking, "a few too many," is not a taper.

A taper has a plan and an end and doesn't need to be more than two to four days. You could have been done days ago but instead you're drinking too much - again.

Your drinking is not getting better, and your mental health isn't either.

If you can't or won't get medical help and you can't taper - what's your Plan for stopping? I mean, some people find it so difficult to taper that they decide it doesn't work at all. Have you tried AA meetings?

I tapered off in less than three days. BUT what I learned is that tapering doesn't work if I allow myself more than two drinks, ever. After two drinks, all bets are off and I would just keep drinking - just like you are saying in your last couple posts.