Chop wood, carry water
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
Chop wood, carry water
Getting sober is unnerving. The road is one that is unknown and is a highly emotional adventure.
People will tell you that it gets better but it surely does not feel that way. How will it ever get better when there is so much upheaval and confusion? Its a troubling place...Getting sober.
So I set about to chop wood and carry water.
My brain said otherwise
Chop wood, carry water.
My emotions said otherwise
Chop wood, carry water
My body said otherwise
Chop wood, carry water
I now chop wood and carry water without all the noise. I chop wood and carry water without all the upheaval. I chop wood and carry water with freedom and I am happy. I have become "good" at chopping wood and carrying water in my life. I want to be better though so I continue to chop wood and carry water. The "structure" I have implemented on a daily basis has kept me sober. It is no longer arduous. This "structure" is my new life and one that has balance, grounding and mental and emotional stability. This forum is a part of the "structure" and for that I THANK YOU!
Chop wood, carry water.
People will tell you that it gets better but it surely does not feel that way. How will it ever get better when there is so much upheaval and confusion? Its a troubling place...Getting sober.
So I set about to chop wood and carry water.
My brain said otherwise
Chop wood, carry water.
My emotions said otherwise
Chop wood, carry water
My body said otherwise
Chop wood, carry water
I now chop wood and carry water without all the noise. I chop wood and carry water without all the upheaval. I chop wood and carry water with freedom and I am happy. I have become "good" at chopping wood and carrying water in my life. I want to be better though so I continue to chop wood and carry water. The "structure" I have implemented on a daily basis has kept me sober. It is no longer arduous. This "structure" is my new life and one that has balance, grounding and mental and emotional stability. This forum is a part of the "structure" and for that I THANK YOU!
Chop wood, carry water.
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Join Date: Jan 2021
Posts: 525
Thanks for sharing. You reminded of the following quote from the Big Book, which comes at the end of the instructions for our daily 11th Step practice on pp. 86-88:
We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined. But this is not all. There is action and more action. "Faith without works is dead." The next chapter is entirely devoted to Step Twelve.
We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined. But this is not all. There is action and more action. "Faith without works is dead." The next chapter is entirely devoted to Step Twelve.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
"Faith without works is dead."
One of my least favorite and often misquoted (out of context) Bible verses.
But this isn't a Bible study or a Big Book study type post.
"Chop wood carry water," is one of my favorite calming sayings.
It's more Buddhist.
Mizz, I agree that doing the next right thing is enough. In early days that often means just staying busy and not picking up a drink, right? If I go to bed sober I've done it right.
The quiet mind comes in time. Some days I'll go nearly the whole day without worrying!
One of my least favorite and often misquoted (out of context) Bible verses.
But this isn't a Bible study or a Big Book study type post.
"Chop wood carry water," is one of my favorite calming sayings.
It's more Buddhist.
Mizz, I agree that doing the next right thing is enough. In early days that often means just staying busy and not picking up a drink, right? If I go to bed sober I've done it right.
The quiet mind comes in time. Some days I'll go nearly the whole day without worrying!
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
This is very important for me and I'm glad you emphasized it with a post, Mizz. When I first got sober, many people here on SR suggested that I approach staying sober in a simple way, and it really puzzled me at the time. I think I understand it very well now and it's probably been the most valuable recommendation for someone like me, who tends to think in very complex ways. That can be useful and fun for many things, but drinking definitely caused a lot of unwanted noise that just made everything overcomplicated, including my intention to quit and methods used, and how I procrastinated many things because I overly focused on and got lost in the (often distorted. or at least unnecessary) processes of my mind. Simple and practical works best for me, hands down. And, as bimini said, the resulting mental peace is priceless I personally haven't even experienced my sobriety so far as a very emotional time at all - drinking for over a decade was, and how useless!
I personally haven't even experienced my sobriety so far as a very emotional time at all - drinking for over a decade was, and how useless!
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With continual practice we can get good with anything really. (I mean, Im not saying we can become the next Serena Williams....or can we? I don't even play tennis but....
I am saying, that life does fall into place when one continues on the path. It levels off. The hard becomes easier.
At least this has been my experience thus far.
No billowy cotton candy pink clouds here. I think that cloud came and went months ago....lol!
I am saying, that life does fall into place when one continues on the path. It levels off. The hard becomes easier.
At least this has been my experience thus far.
No billowy cotton candy pink clouds here. I think that cloud came and went months ago....lol!
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
I also wanted to add that, I think, this post highlights very well how and why psychotherapy did no good for me in the past, when I was trying to get sober with a lot of investigation but with no real practical tools and action. It just added even more noise (tons of it!) to the complex and exacerbated some of the things I was already habitually doing, and reinforced the same maladaptive approach. I quit therapy long before I quit drinking because I realized this. Yet, the professionals I was seeing said the opposite, suggested it was wrong for me to stop therapy, and did not want to let me go. I don't blame them now because, for many people, a lot of new self-analysis and therapy is really needed to get better, and my therapists probably didn't know me well enough to be able to tell where I belong on that spectrum (none of them knew me longer than a couple years). Of course they also wanted their work and income, plus probably founds part of working with me interesting and stimulating, even challenging... But it definitely hindered my getting better. This is why I love to take good advice that makes sense in the context of who I am, but refuse to engage in exaggerated self-analysis and conversation about these things unless I see a clear practical implication. Of course it would probably go much better now sober, but still just... unnecessary for me. This is not for everyone, but I'm sharing because I know there are others like me in this regard, and they might also be looking in the wrong places
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I had no idea how I could get sober or what would keep me sober. I never thought simple physical tasks would be one of the main things that got me there. I have a second job working with my hands and solving physical and mechanical problems. I cannot prove it, but I think it is one of the most important things I do for a quiet mind. And a quiet mind is the only way I stay sober.
Chop wood and carry water Mizz. I think if that is the only thing that keeps us healthy, that is enough.
Chop wood and carry water Mizz. I think if that is the only thing that keeps us healthy, that is enough.
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Aellyce,
There are many roads to the same destination like AA, SMART, Lifering, therapy....etc.... Standing on ones head
It became glaringly obvious to me that I needed to stay present in the day and do the next best thing. Diving into my past, my future, my whatever was not going to be helpful in the beginnings of this round of sobriety. I don't need to analyze myself any more than I already do. In fact, I needed to stop doing that. I was overwhelmed with doing that. I needed to level off. I needed to create better habits and structure that empowered my life and helped me to feel good about what I was doing with my life. Build on my esteem. Trust myself.
Maybe I will dive into all that "inner" stuff when I feel like it. Maybe I wont. Ive already done a lot of work there and there is plenty more to do but I am not in a rush.
I just know that I needed to chop wood and carry water which really means (to me) keeping a solid structure of my days and nights. With this structure I am able to face issues, and a few have come up, with a calmer approach. It takes me a little time to figure out how to address it but not one of those issues was or is an emergency. I don't need answers right away. The answers will come with time.
Am I off base with what you are talking about?
There are many roads to the same destination like AA, SMART, Lifering, therapy....etc.... Standing on ones head
It became glaringly obvious to me that I needed to stay present in the day and do the next best thing. Diving into my past, my future, my whatever was not going to be helpful in the beginnings of this round of sobriety. I don't need to analyze myself any more than I already do. In fact, I needed to stop doing that. I was overwhelmed with doing that. I needed to level off. I needed to create better habits and structure that empowered my life and helped me to feel good about what I was doing with my life. Build on my esteem. Trust myself.
Maybe I will dive into all that "inner" stuff when I feel like it. Maybe I wont. Ive already done a lot of work there and there is plenty more to do but I am not in a rush.
I just know that I needed to chop wood and carry water which really means (to me) keeping a solid structure of my days and nights. With this structure I am able to face issues, and a few have come up, with a calmer approach. It takes me a little time to figure out how to address it but not one of those issues was or is an emergency. I don't need answers right away. The answers will come with time.
Am I off base with what you are talking about?
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Originally Posted by Surrendered19 
I had no idea how I could get sober or what would keep me sober. I never thought simple physical tasks would be one of the main things that got me there. I have a second job working with my hands and solving physical and mechanical problems. I cannot prove it, but I think it is one of the most important things I do for a quiet mind. And a quiet mind is the only way I stay sober.
Chop wood and carry water Mizz. I think if that is the only thing that keeps us healthy, that is enough.
Chop wood and carry water Mizz. I think if that is the only thing that keeps us healthy, that is enough.
I had no idea how sobriety would work this time around but I do know that what I am doing is working. What you are doing is working. Today. We have today.
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Yes - it's a phrase that has served me well along my sober path as well as on other days of trouble and struggle in life. Sometimes I say to myself "task at hand" = another means of focusing the mind on the present and what can be done with life - rather than be dragged down by the past or cowed by the future.
Thanks for the reminder today Mizz. Although for me today it's more accurately phrased "shovel snow, scrape ice" -
Thanks for the reminder today Mizz. Although for me today it's more accurately phrased "shovel snow, scrape ice" -
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Originally Posted by lessgravity
"shovel snow, scrape ice" -
Members here have been digging themselves out, thawing out and really dealing with it. Sorry, guys. Thinking of you all!
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Join Date: Dec 2015
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Great thread Mizz. I love your work.
Carrying water and chopping wood right alongside you all. Peace.
I saw this in another place. Hope it makes you smile:
To be is to do - Socrates
To do is to be - Jean-Paul Sartre
Do be do be do - Frank Sinatra
Love to all.
Carrying water and chopping wood right alongside you all. Peace.
I saw this in another place. Hope it makes you smile:
To be is to do - Socrates
To do is to be - Jean-Paul Sartre
Do be do be do - Frank Sinatra
Love to all.
Steely
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Hahaha Steely..
You guys are killing me.. but seriously Mizz - absolutely great thread, really important for me to read that right now.
I tend to overcomplicate everything, and as a result, get overwhelmed and frustrated. Then I want a you-know-what, lol.
Thanks for the post!
You guys are killing me.. but seriously Mizz - absolutely great thread, really important for me to read that right now.
I tend to overcomplicate everything, and as a result, get overwhelmed and frustrated. Then I want a you-know-what, lol.
Thanks for the post!
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
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Originally Posted by Aellyce2
I also wanted to add that, I think, this post highlights very well how and why psychotherapy did no good for me in the past, when I was trying to get sober with a lot of investigation but with no real practical tools and action. It just added even more noise (tons of it!) to the complex and exacerbated some of the things I was already habitually doing, and reinforced the same maladaptive approach. I quit therapy long before I quit drinking because I realized this. Yet, the professionals I was seeing said the opposite, suggested it was wrong for me to stop therapy, and did not want to let me go.
I've had bad therapy too. I also had a gifted therapist that uncovered so much of my childhood trauma symptoms that I was impressed, I actually experienced a few significant revelations. Good therapy changed the way I looked at the world, myself, family, friends. I was drastically changed for the better. I have imminence gratitude for the proper therapy I experienced. I now owe my life to the gifted ones.
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