Flow In, Flow Out, Weekenders, January 29 - 01 February 2021
Flow In, Flow Out, Weekenders, January 29 - 01 February 2021
Welcome to the Weekenders
I was reading through my notes and found a passage that our Gilmer had written for Weekenders.
It resonated with me so much, as I tend to think I can do everything on my own.
But when I stopped drinking endless times only to pick up again...I realised I couldn’t do this alone.
I thought it too precious to leave behind, so I’ve used it for our weekend thread. I know Gilmer would give me her blessing.
There’s an old saying, “No man is an island.”
That’s the design, anyway. I have heard that in order to fully flourish we need both a source of input to our souls and a source of output. A pond with no input or output eventually evaporates. A pond with an output with no input will quickly be drained. With no input, a pond’s water grows too salty to use.
In order for human beings to function best, we need a steady input of inspiration and warmth. That inspiration and warmth should combine with our own thoughts and sentiments and increase; and then we should allow it to flow out to enrich others.
You may think, “Ha! I’m a zero—I have nothing profound to offer!”
Everybody’s got something to offer; who says it has to be “profound”?
And we may feel that we have no opportunity for meaningful interaction with others. For a long time when we were drinking, we grew more and more isolated and self-absorbed; so when we quit we can feel terribly alone and cut off from the rest of humanity.
There are environments that specialize in welcoming “outcasts” like us: AA groups, churches and other places of worship, and online forums dedicated to special common interests (like SR). Look for contact that inspires you; limit contact that aggravates you.
And then look for areas in which your ideas and insights can flow out to others. Any of the above places will work—also consider volunteering in your community. That will take your gaze out of your own navel and help you to connect with and care about others.
Whatever endeavor you choose to invest in, give it your very best. Don’t try something just for five minutes, then walk away when there’s not an immediate payoff. The key is to invest yourself. Be willing to put time and work into your relationships. Force yourself to develop patience (if you have a HP, definitely ask for help. It’s hard to switch to better mindsets in our own strength).
The only way to discover what all you have to give is to start trying to give something. You’ll find it easier as you go along—and it will bring you true joy to bring joy to others.
But you can’t give what you don’t have. Look for people (including a HP), books and other materials that bring you joy. Enrich yourself, and then you’ll be happy to enrich others.
Your life will no longer be stagnant if you have both inflow and outflow.
If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!)
I was reading through my notes and found a passage that our Gilmer had written for Weekenders.
It resonated with me so much, as I tend to think I can do everything on my own.
But when I stopped drinking endless times only to pick up again...I realised I couldn’t do this alone.
I thought it too precious to leave behind, so I’ve used it for our weekend thread. I know Gilmer would give me her blessing.
There’s an old saying, “No man is an island.”
That’s the design, anyway. I have heard that in order to fully flourish we need both a source of input to our souls and a source of output. A pond with no input or output eventually evaporates. A pond with an output with no input will quickly be drained. With no input, a pond’s water grows too salty to use.
In order for human beings to function best, we need a steady input of inspiration and warmth. That inspiration and warmth should combine with our own thoughts and sentiments and increase; and then we should allow it to flow out to enrich others.
You may think, “Ha! I’m a zero—I have nothing profound to offer!”
Everybody’s got something to offer; who says it has to be “profound”?
And we may feel that we have no opportunity for meaningful interaction with others. For a long time when we were drinking, we grew more and more isolated and self-absorbed; so when we quit we can feel terribly alone and cut off from the rest of humanity.
There are environments that specialize in welcoming “outcasts” like us: AA groups, churches and other places of worship, and online forums dedicated to special common interests (like SR). Look for contact that inspires you; limit contact that aggravates you.
And then look for areas in which your ideas and insights can flow out to others. Any of the above places will work—also consider volunteering in your community. That will take your gaze out of your own navel and help you to connect with and care about others.
Whatever endeavor you choose to invest in, give it your very best. Don’t try something just for five minutes, then walk away when there’s not an immediate payoff. The key is to invest yourself. Be willing to put time and work into your relationships. Force yourself to develop patience (if you have a HP, definitely ask for help. It’s hard to switch to better mindsets in our own strength).
The only way to discover what all you have to give is to start trying to give something. You’ll find it easier as you go along—and it will bring you true joy to bring joy to others.
But you can’t give what you don’t have. Look for people (including a HP), books and other materials that bring you joy. Enrich yourself, and then you’ll be happy to enrich others.
Your life will no longer be stagnant if you have both inflow and outflow.
If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!)
Thanks Mags!
A great opening post, very thought provoking.
I'm definitely IN this weekend. In fact I'm going to be very busy this weekend. I'm getting my entire house painted and decorated starting from Monday, the decorator is due to start at 9am on Monday morning. From today until Sunday I'm going to be busy giving each room and area of the house a deep and thorough clean. I should really have started doing this a week or two back but things kept getting in the way and as usual I've put off doing things until virtually the last minute. So today it's the bathroom and kitchen as they are the rooms that will be getting painted first. Needless to say, I hate housework beyond simple dusting and hoovering so I'm not looking forward to doing any of this!
A great opening post, very thought provoking.
I'm definitely IN this weekend. In fact I'm going to be very busy this weekend. I'm getting my entire house painted and decorated starting from Monday, the decorator is due to start at 9am on Monday morning. From today until Sunday I'm going to be busy giving each room and area of the house a deep and thorough clean. I should really have started doing this a week or two back but things kept getting in the way and as usual I've put off doing things until virtually the last minute. So today it's the bathroom and kitchen as they are the rooms that will be getting painted first. Needless to say, I hate housework beyond simple dusting and hoovering so I'm not looking forward to doing any of this!
Congratulations on shotgun Hawkeye
Congratulations on 14 weeks bulimia free and 8 years sober
Robbie, nice having the painters in, I’m like you, leave it until last minute. It’ll keep you busy.
Congratulations on 14 weeks bulimia free and 8 years sober
Robbie, nice having the painters in, I’m like you, leave it until last minute. It’ll keep you busy.
Thanks Mags.
All I know is I am flowing in too much food at the moment, probably best we don't talk about that output .
Robbie, how lovely getting your house done up. I would love to get my hall (more of a passageway) done, well actually the whole house needs it. I used to do all my own decorating but that was a long time ago. I would have no idea how much a decorator costs. Good luck with the cleaning.
Glad you are feeling good Devizes, nothing better.
All I know is I am flowing in too much food at the moment, probably best we don't talk about that output .
Robbie, how lovely getting your house done up. I would love to get my hall (more of a passageway) done, well actually the whole house needs it. I used to do all my own decorating but that was a long time ago. I would have no idea how much a decorator costs. Good luck with the cleaning.
Glad you are feeling good Devizes, nothing better.
Thanks Gilmer and thanks Mags.
The whole planet is on the inflow-outflow cycle. Heck, the whole Universe. All of us are connected in that way.
One of my favorite things are tides. I love the variation(s) and the difference at the beach during different phases of the tides.
My favorite spot :
The whole planet is on the inflow-outflow cycle. Heck, the whole Universe. All of us are connected in that way.
One of my favorite things are tides. I love the variation(s) and the difference at the beach during different phases of the tides.
My favorite spot :
Erica, it’s been raining most of the day here, but at least it’s not icy for a change.
Marty, I hope all goes well with your test and the right outcome.
Hiya Reid
Hiya Lunar, hope you and Jobu are ok, and the new vinegaroons too.
Marty, I hope all goes well with your test and the right outcome.
Hiya Reid
Hiya Lunar, hope you and Jobu are ok, and the new vinegaroons too.
Thanks so. I have, Mags. And thanks to our dear Gilmer; miss her very much. I wonder what message she would send us now if she could. She was so devout and I imagine that it would be something to the effect of “Have Faith; what is now is temporary. What lies ahead is better than you could ever possibly imagine.”
It was a nose swab. Not much fun, but not all that bad either. I'll have to get used to it. I will have to do it every two weeks if I want to go to work at the office more than once a week. And I do want to. Lab right on site, so it took about 30 minutes from beginning to end. I don't have covid right now. . Went back to the office and worked there for a while. Back to working at home for the rest of the day now.
Thanks so. I have, Mags. And thanks to our dear Gilmer; miss her very much. I wonder what message she would send us now if she could. She was so devout and I imagine that it would be something to the effect of “Have Faith; what is now is temporary. What lies ahead is better than you could ever possibly imagine.”
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poe...ossing-the-bar
Thanks Mags for the thread. As others have said, most thought provoking to read and contemplate. I'm certainly in for the weekend.
Working late tonight and early tomorrow and for that I am grateful... Best wishes to all. Forwards.
Working late tonight and early tomorrow and for that I am grateful... Best wishes to all. Forwards.
I'm hesitant to speak for Gilmer but I think Tennyson's "Crossing the Bar" might have expressed her sentiments:
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poe...ossing-the-bar
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poe...ossing-the-bar
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