Relapsed and messed it up
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a fantastic way to honor someone we've loved and lost is to live a life they'd be proud of.... to live sober and present and to cherish the life we're given.... showing others how to do that same thing.
I'm sorry for your loss.
I'm sorry for your loss.
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Originally Posted by Steely 
Good idea to wait until you speak with your sister. Get you head together best you can and seek rest. Water is important.
My brother died in nursing home during a lockdown here, and understand the hurt, the feelings all over the shop.
I know in my heart that he would not want want me to get high over it.
Your thoughts will be scattered so try best you can to rest. It's what you need right now. That, and NOT picking up.
Things will improve gradually by just taking these first simple steps.
Tomorrow is another day. A better day.
My brother died in nursing home during a lockdown here, and understand the hurt, the feelings all over the shop.
I know in my heart that he would not want want me to get high over it.
Your thoughts will be scattered so try best you can to rest. It's what you need right now. That, and NOT picking up.
Things will improve gradually by just taking these first simple steps.
Tomorrow is another day. A better day.
THANK you!! Sadlyyy I picked up againb this morning ugh
((( but that’s ls the last of the addy that I have. andd I’ll delete the number. Took off From work so I can get it together. The funeral is next Week so I need to be together for that. You’re right, he wouldn’t want me getting high over it. I need to get my **** together. I haven’t slept now in like a little over 2 days, hopefully sleep happens soon. Thank you again for the kind words!
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Originally Posted by Anna
I'm very sorry for the loss of your grandfather, especially that you didn't get a chance to see him.
I hope you decide to stop drinking now and get back on track. Get some rest, drink some water, eat something and you will be okay.
I hope you decide to stop drinking now and get back on track. Get some rest, drink some water, eat something and you will be okay.
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Originally Posted by snitch
Oh wow. I am so so sorry for your loss and I understand exactly how you feel as I was unable to say goodbye to my beautiful nan before she passed, many years ago now and I would drink over that pain. I didn't know your grandad but I feel confident that he would not want you drinking or using over his passing and to be in this kind of pain. I know that my nan would not have wanted that for me.
As addicts and alcoholics our old solution when we are in pain is to drink and use to take that pain away however as you are experiencing now, it doesnt take it away only makes it 100 times worse.
You've slipped up but dont beat yourself up. You dont have to drink or use again stay close for support, dont pick up again and get back on the sober train. I know the feelings are painful but as painful as they are they won't kill you. we can get through anything without a drink or a drug.
Sending you lots of love and prayers
♥️🙏
As addicts and alcoholics our old solution when we are in pain is to drink and use to take that pain away however as you are experiencing now, it doesnt take it away only makes it 100 times worse.
You've slipped up but dont beat yourself up. You dont have to drink or use again stay close for support, dont pick up again and get back on the sober train. I know the feelings are painful but as painful as they are they won't kill you. we can get through anything without a drink or a drug.
Sending you lots of love and prayers
♥️🙏
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Originally Posted by stickyone
I deeply understand the pain of not getting to say goodbye to someone you love.. And also the pain of saying goodbye to your love. What has helped me don't isolate yourself call a friend a family member who close. But if you choose to be alone it's okay too. Check in tomorrow let the SR family know how you are feeling.
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Originally Posted by MythOfSisyphus
I'm sorry for your loss! I'm sure you grandfather wouldn't want you to suffer though. I know you can get back to sobriety!
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Originally Posted by FreeOwl
a fantastic way to honor someone we've loved and lost is to live a life they'd be proud of.... to live sober and present and to cherish the life we're given.... showing others how to do that same thing.
I'm sorry for your loss.
I'm sorry for your loss.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by SendSleep
thank you! You’re soo soo right and I really want to do that. I gotta get it together! Tomorrow will be day 1. I wanna make my grandpa proud of me. I know I haveee a lot of offer when I’m sober and in my right mind. Thank you again.
how? Well, stop drinking / drugging / addictive thinking, NOW.
EMBRACE SOBRIETY.... NOW.
How?
Say it out loud:
"I am powerless against alcohol and my life has become unmanageable"
Then, think about something you know to exist outside yourself... sometime, perhaps, like the sun. It rises every day. You are powerless to stop it. Whether you drink or don't, it rises and it shines.... you must be powerless against it, too... it must be a power greater than yourself AND alcohol.
So, thinking of that thing..... say that "I believe that this power greater than me can help restore me to sanity:
And finally.... say "I turn my will and my life over to this power greater than me, as I understand it"
And then say "HELP ME..... PLEASE, HELP ME live a life of sobriety and presence....."
It begins right NOW, not tomorrow.... now.
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Originally Posted by FreeOwl
Best way to make "tomorrow" your day one is to make TODAY your day one.
how? Well, stop drinking / drugging / addictive thinking, NOW.
EMBRACE SOBRIETY.... NOW.
How?
Say it out loud:
"I am powerless against alcohol and my life has become unmanageable"
Then, think about something you know to exist outside yourself... sometime, perhaps, like the sun. It rises every day. You are powerless to stop it. Whether you drink or don't, it rises and it shines.... you must be powerless against it, too... it must be a power greater than yourself AND alcohol.
So, thinking of that thing..... say that "I believe that this power greater than me can help restore me to sanity:
And finally.... say "I turn my will and my life over to this power greater than me, as I understand it"
And then say "HELP ME..... PLEASE, HELP ME live a life of sobriety and presence....."
It begins right NOW, not tomorrow.... now.
how? Well, stop drinking / drugging / addictive thinking, NOW.
EMBRACE SOBRIETY.... NOW.
How?
Say it out loud:
"I am powerless against alcohol and my life has become unmanageable"
Then, think about something you know to exist outside yourself... sometime, perhaps, like the sun. It rises every day. You are powerless to stop it. Whether you drink or don't, it rises and it shines.... you must be powerless against it, too... it must be a power greater than yourself AND alcohol.
So, thinking of that thing..... say that "I believe that this power greater than me can help restore me to sanity:
And finally.... say "I turn my will and my life over to this power greater than me, as I understand it"
And then say "HELP ME..... PLEASE, HELP ME live a life of sobriety and presence....."
It begins right NOW, not tomorrow.... now.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by SendSleep
thank you!!! I have slept for a few days and am ready for sobriety. I have deleted my dealers number and am going to see about attending a zoom NA meeting. I need to stay sober for myself and my family and in my grandfathers memory. The funeral is Sunday and I will be giving a speech then. I’m determined to make it through sober and continue to do so. Thank you again and Merry Christmas!
How are you today?
What are you feeling?
Where in your body is the feeling? Is it able to move through? Are you able to connect with it?
My thought would be; spend some time quietly sitting with your feeling. Try a simple meditation or two. Write for your speech, journal about your grandfather and your own struggle and reflect on what this moment in your life's journey holds for you in terms of lessons, insights, connection to your authentic self.
Keep checking in here regularly. You're in a delicate spot and it can be easy to make a poor decision (I know, I just did yesterday with respect to cannabis because of not being with and reacting to my emotions in a healthy way).
You've got this! Sobriety / drug-free presence will serve you so much better and honor your grandfather and your family so much more fully than a drink or a drug.
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Originally Posted by FreeOwl
A speech for your grandfather's memory and your family's comfort is a grand reason to remain sober and to be present and clear, authentic and full of heart with your words.
How are you today?
What are you feeling?
Where in your body is the feeling? Is it able to move through? Are you able to connect with it?
My thought would be; spend some time quietly sitting with your feeling. Try a simple meditation or two. Write for your speech, journal about your grandfather and your own struggle and reflect on what this moment in your life's journey holds for you in terms of lessons, insights, connection to your authentic self.
Keep checking in here regularly. You're in a delicate spot and it can be easy to make a poor decision (I know, I just did yesterday with respect to cannabis because of not being with and reacting to my emotions in a healthy way).
You've got this! Sobriety / drug-free presence will serve you so much better and honor your grandfather and your family so much more fully than a drink or a drug.
How are you today?
What are you feeling?
Where in your body is the feeling? Is it able to move through? Are you able to connect with it?
My thought would be; spend some time quietly sitting with your feeling. Try a simple meditation or two. Write for your speech, journal about your grandfather and your own struggle and reflect on what this moment in your life's journey holds for you in terms of lessons, insights, connection to your authentic self.
Keep checking in here regularly. You're in a delicate spot and it can be easy to make a poor decision (I know, I just did yesterday with respect to cannabis because of not being with and reacting to my emotions in a healthy way).
You've got this! Sobriety / drug-free presence will serve you so much better and honor your grandfather and your family so much more fully than a drink or a drug.
yes, I plan to check in regularly as I think when I started not to check in, it put me in a position to have a harder time saying no to temptations. How are you doing today?
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You did some amazing work today. I was thinking of you tonight actually. I was wondering how you were doing and how the funeral went, knowing that you were giving a speech. Its good to see you have checked in and are starting to journal.
I am sorry for your loss. Truly.
I am sorry for your loss. Truly.
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Originally Posted by Mizz P
You did some amazing work today. I was thinking of you tonight actually. I was wondering how you were doing and how the funeral went, knowing that you were giving a speech. Its good to see you have checked in and are starting to journal.
I am sorry for your loss. Truly.
I am sorry for your loss. Truly.
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Posts: 139
Originally Posted by anxiousrock
Sorry to hear about your grandfather. Do you not get a few days off work for bereavement?
I dont think everyone will know your high...it's usually not as bad as you think!
I dont think everyone will know your high...it's usually not as bad as you think!
I know you’re right, but when you’re high if feels like everyone knows lol. I’m glad to be sober today
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I’ve been in a bad place. A month afterrrr my grandfather died thenbn My grandmother passed away from Covid in January and my best friend was in the hospital and it set me offf.Commming back and hoping tomorrow is day 1.I’ve been using and drinking tooX all. I’ve held my job but we’ve lost clients due to budget and I think I’m going to be let go because I first hire and haveee made some mistakes and haven’t my left the my house because people know I’m high, and everyone knows and ugh! I feel pretty hopeless right now. I know it all my fault and I really hate myself and I’m sorry. I just want to sleep and be okay. . I hope you are all well and safe during these times.
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