I drank again
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,100
Hi Mera, you seem a little defensive here in your response to KMT. Just because another member doesn't post alot about their personal experiences doesn't mean they don't understand or don't care. For myself, when I get defensive its a signal I need to look deeper within. I can be very defensive.
That said, reading your recent posts has me quivering. I'm a mom too. I cannot believe they would force socialization on a parent like this. I for one self isolate a lot and even moreso since I stopped drinking. Socializing is one of my main triggers to drink.
I'm really really feeling for you right now. You're in a tough spot, no doubt about it. But where there's a will there's a way. I really believe that. Keep working at it.
That said, reading your recent posts has me quivering. I'm a mom too. I cannot believe they would force socialization on a parent like this. I for one self isolate a lot and even moreso since I stopped drinking. Socializing is one of my main triggers to drink.
I'm really really feeling for you right now. You're in a tough spot, no doubt about it. But where there's a will there's a way. I really believe that. Keep working at it.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Just a reminder to use Ignore when someone's post upsets you. And, of course, members are welcome to post as much or as little about their situation as they are comfortable with. 
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
Originally Posted by Sober45 
Hi Mera, you seem a little defensive here in your response to KMT. Just because another member doesn't post alot about their personal experiences doesn't mean they don't understand or don't care. For myself, when I get defensive its a signal I need to look deeper within. I can be very defensive.
That said, reading your recent posts has me quivering. I'm a mom too. I cannot believe they would force socialization on a parent like this. I for one self isolate a lot and even moreso since I stopped drinking. Socializing is one of my main triggers to drink.
I'm really really feeling for you right now. You're in a tough spot, no doubt about it. But where there's a will there's a way. I really believe that. Keep working at it.
That said, reading your recent posts has me quivering. I'm a mom too. I cannot believe they would force socialization on a parent like this. I for one self isolate a lot and even moreso since I stopped drinking. Socializing is one of my main triggers to drink.
I'm really really feeling for you right now. You're in a tough spot, no doubt about it. But where there's a will there's a way. I really believe that. Keep working at it.
you are right but I feel confident in what I said. I am tired of this type of negativity and felt the need to not just defend myself but to do so for others. I hurt for the words shared with others in need. But yes, I should check myself and be aware of triggers s, this person being one. I don’t do well with harsh treatment of others but need to recognize that it has a place. I will do better.
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,654
Mera, the court/family services system sounds extremely draconian, compared with the UK. That said, you seem to know the system and yet you chose to drink, when your sons were visiting you, and have just disclosed that you asked your son to 'tell' on you? If you knew the repercussions, is there an element of self-sabotage involved? Have you passed the details of this incident to your personal psychologist/therapist (not the court appointed ones)? That maybe a good idea, because they'll support you.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
I am so sick of this! Does anyone hear me?!? I get that I am a “drama queen” (as so kindly messaged to me via private mail) and that I bang on endlessly about how much I am being attacked. I get it, I am a drama queen and regoice in suffering. What the ef ever. Sometimes life just sucks. I get that I don’t deserve sympathy more than anyone else but I don’t know... just a kind word here and there that will send me on my way. This SUCKS.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
Originally Posted by Tatsy
Mera, the court/family services system sounds extremely draconian, compared with the UK. That said, you seem to know the system and yet you chose to drink, when your sons were visiting you, and have just disclosed that you asked your son to 'tell' on you? If you knew the repercussions, is there an element of self-sabotage involved? Have you passed the details of this incident to your personal psychologist/therapist (not the court appointed ones)? That maybe a good idea, because they'll support you.
I have not asked my son to tell on me but support him if he does.
soberfighterwriter
Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 1,722
I'm here. On day 4. I'm a mother too, so I think I know a little bit about what you're going through. You have worked so incredibly hard to get where you are, against all odds, so please don't beat yourself up for that slip. You stopped drinking, you fessed up, and that takes courage. I'm proud of you.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
My go to thing to get back on track is to do something good when I feel like doing something bad. Unfortunately today because if my hangover I didn’t do anything good for me. However I did reach out to my neighbor. We have never met but I saw they had the purple trash bags which means: COVID. If you are sick or in quarantine you have to put your trash out with special bags. I didn’t have the strength to clean or bathe but I did write a letter to my neighbors saying I was sort they were sick and if they needed I would go to the market or the pharmacy fir then. One good thing. That’s what helps me move forward.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Mera, we are all trying to support you. I'm sorry that you don't see that. We all care a lot about you and are doing our best to offer support.
It's good that you were able to send a kind message to your neighbour. I'm sure it's appreciated.
You may not like all the comments. Maybe some of the comments seem harsh to you, but people are trying to help. Please use Ignore if someone upsets you.
It's good that you were able to send a kind message to your neighbour. I'm sure it's appreciated.
You may not like all the comments. Maybe some of the comments seem harsh to you, but people are trying to help. Please use Ignore if someone upsets you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,100
Mera, Step back and take some extremely deep breaths. I'm doing that right now. It will help you hit the reset button. I can feel your vibe, Mera. But everything is going to be ok.
Over on my end, my daughter called me today...anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts. Some days I feel like I'm going to collapse and today is one of those days. But Mera, we have to step back and catch ourselves.
Sending peaceful vibes your way, Mera xoxo
Over on my end, my daughter called me today...anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts. Some days I feel like I'm going to collapse and today is one of those days. But Mera, we have to step back and catch ourselves.
Sending peaceful vibes your way, Mera xoxo
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
Originally Posted by Sober45
Mera, Step back and take some extremely deep breaths. I'm doing that right now. It will help you hit the reset button. I can feel your vibe, Mera. But everything is going to be ok.
Over on my end, my daughter called me today...anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts. Some days I feel like I'm going to collapse and today is one of those days. But Mera, we have to step back and catch ourselves.
Sending peaceful vibes your way, Mera xoxo
Over on my end, my daughter called me today...anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts. Some days I feel like I'm going to collapse and today is one of those days. But Mera, we have to step back and catch ourselves.
Sending peaceful vibes your way, Mera xoxo
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