Dealing with alcoholism at a young age
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Join Date: Nov 2020
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Dealing with alcoholism at a young age
I just feel the need to speak about my problem so came here.
I originally started drinking at the age of 14, my friends and I came from bad backgrounds and many of those around us were dealing with drug addictions. We started binge drinking and believed there was no problem with it because of witnessing so much worse, a good handful of us (myself definitely being one of them) used to drink to forget troubling memories at the time. As I got older I became passionate about studying and so drank less and less, from 16-18 I could regularly go 5 days without drinking (which I know is not much but for my track record it is). I ended up at a very stressful university and after my 19th birthday, I slowly started drinking more and more until it became every day. I now usually drink 4 beers every night. I am not physically dependent but I am emotionally dependent, without a drink on a night, I fall into a spiral of anxiety and the few nights I do manage not to drink (maybe once a fortnight) I struggle a lot. I no longer drink to forget anything in particular, its just that without it I feel an irrational sense of anxiety. I have been honest with myself about having a problem for the past 6 months but I don't feel ready to tell anybody, or stop. What should I do? Is it realistically possible to go back being a social drinker? I feel like it is also worth mentioning that when I drink with friends, I drink far more than when I'm alone.
I turn 21 this month and feel so alone, I have been living in a very different place for the past two years, having an addiction problem here at such a young age is unheard of, and I feel ashamed.
I originally started drinking at the age of 14, my friends and I came from bad backgrounds and many of those around us were dealing with drug addictions. We started binge drinking and believed there was no problem with it because of witnessing so much worse, a good handful of us (myself definitely being one of them) used to drink to forget troubling memories at the time. As I got older I became passionate about studying and so drank less and less, from 16-18 I could regularly go 5 days without drinking (which I know is not much but for my track record it is). I ended up at a very stressful university and after my 19th birthday, I slowly started drinking more and more until it became every day. I now usually drink 4 beers every night. I am not physically dependent but I am emotionally dependent, without a drink on a night, I fall into a spiral of anxiety and the few nights I do manage not to drink (maybe once a fortnight) I struggle a lot. I no longer drink to forget anything in particular, its just that without it I feel an irrational sense of anxiety. I have been honest with myself about having a problem for the past 6 months but I don't feel ready to tell anybody, or stop. What should I do? Is it realistically possible to go back being a social drinker? I feel like it is also worth mentioning that when I drink with friends, I drink far more than when I'm alone.
I turn 21 this month and feel so alone, I have been living in a very different place for the past two years, having an addiction problem here at such a young age is unheard of, and I feel ashamed.
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Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: USA
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Originally Posted by UmbriaPunta 
I just feel the need to speak about my problem so came here.
I originally started drinking at the age of 14, my friends and I came from bad backgrounds and many of those around us were dealing with drug addictions. We started binge drinking and believed there was no problem with it because of witnessing so much worse, a good handful of us (myself definitely being one of them) used to drink to forget troubling memories at the time. As I got older I became passionate about studying and so drank less and less, from 16-18 I could regularly go 5 days without drinking (which I know is not much but for my track record it is). I ended up at a very stressful university and after my 19th birthday, I slowly started drinking more and more until it became every day. I now usually drink 4 beers every night. I am not physically dependent but I am emotionally dependent, without a drink on a night, I fall into a spiral of anxiety and the few nights I do manage not to drink (maybe once a fortnight) I struggle a lot. I no longer drink to forget anything in particular, its just that without it I feel an irrational sense of anxiety. I have been honest with myself about having a problem for the past 6 months but I don't feel ready to tell anybody, or stop. What should I do? Is it realistically possible to go back being a social drinker? I feel like it is also worth mentioning that when I drink with friends, I drink far more than when I'm alone.
I turn 21 this month and feel so alone, I have been living in a very different place for the past two years, having an addiction problem here at such a young age is unheard of, and I feel ashamed.
I originally started drinking at the age of 14, my friends and I came from bad backgrounds and many of those around us were dealing with drug addictions. We started binge drinking and believed there was no problem with it because of witnessing so much worse, a good handful of us (myself definitely being one of them) used to drink to forget troubling memories at the time. As I got older I became passionate about studying and so drank less and less, from 16-18 I could regularly go 5 days without drinking (which I know is not much but for my track record it is). I ended up at a very stressful university and after my 19th birthday, I slowly started drinking more and more until it became every day. I now usually drink 4 beers every night. I am not physically dependent but I am emotionally dependent, without a drink on a night, I fall into a spiral of anxiety and the few nights I do manage not to drink (maybe once a fortnight) I struggle a lot. I no longer drink to forget anything in particular, its just that without it I feel an irrational sense of anxiety. I have been honest with myself about having a problem for the past 6 months but I don't feel ready to tell anybody, or stop. What should I do? Is it realistically possible to go back being a social drinker? I feel like it is also worth mentioning that when I drink with friends, I drink far more than when I'm alone.
I turn 21 this month and feel so alone, I have been living in a very different place for the past two years, having an addiction problem here at such a young age is unheard of, and I feel ashamed.
Unless you are living on an island and you're the only person there it is not unheard of people having an addiction at such a young age. That's just my opinion.
Drinking alone was always my go to. It's not a good sign. And all that said, 14 is pretty early. I personally started at 21 and you don't want the mess I am in.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 774
Between my two and half rehabs (I had to go back for a 'refresher course', lol) while the average age was probably around 40-45, there was one 21 year old in each of the groups, and a 22 year old, so three of around your age. Recovery at a young age is hard when you think you are the only one, but, actually, you are not, and you will look back with gratitude that you got into recovery so young.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,427
Hi and welcome 
Most people here will tell you they wish they;d stopped at a young age. Even if you have a reluctance to quit right now, something bought you here - look around, read a little. There is life after drinking and its a good life
I've never met anyone here who was so dependent they couldn't quit and stay quit. I used to drink all day every day and I quit.
oh and I tried to be a normal drinker for 20 years - never made it. I've done much better not drinking at all
D
Most people here will tell you they wish they;d stopped at a young age. Even if you have a reluctance to quit right now, something bought you here - look around, read a little. There is life after drinking and its a good life
I've never met anyone here who was so dependent they couldn't quit and stay quit. I used to drink all day every day and I quit.
oh and I tried to be a normal drinker for 20 years - never made it. I've done much better not drinking at all
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 2,279
Hi Umbria. I was addicted aged 21...went to AA groups aged 23/24 but it never really "stuck". It just gets worse...I am only 41 now and being sober is great.
Go for it. You are young and your brain will heal much quicker than older folks - your age is an advantage!
Go for it. You are young and your brain will heal much quicker than older folks - your age is an advantage!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 94
Hey,
I was pretty young as well. I was 25 when first received help but can’t really pinpoint when I had started to spiral the tears before.
I think AA does offer some youth groups. Could most likely find an online meeting. However if you are willing to try AA as a support network you may find that she doesn’t always matter. In any group people off all ages are scared and understand.
you are doing the right thing reaching out. I missed a large part of my 20s and wish I had worked on it sooner instead of it progressing. I have just started my 30s and loving sobriety now that I have gotten over the initial hurdels that were the most challenging. I, like many others had been told that I would probably never get sober, but I did and you can too. If you are struggling in the evenings I would suggest reaching out for medical help. Depending where you are there is a lot of support.
don’t give up and accept that this is life. We can learn to control our lives again
I was pretty young as well. I was 25 when first received help but can’t really pinpoint when I had started to spiral the tears before.
I think AA does offer some youth groups. Could most likely find an online meeting. However if you are willing to try AA as a support network you may find that she doesn’t always matter. In any group people off all ages are scared and understand.
you are doing the right thing reaching out. I missed a large part of my 20s and wish I had worked on it sooner instead of it progressing. I have just started my 30s and loving sobriety now that I have gotten over the initial hurdels that were the most challenging. I, like many others had been told that I would probably never get sober, but I did and you can too. If you are struggling in the evenings I would suggest reaching out for medical help. Depending where you are there is a lot of support.
don’t give up and accept that this is life. We can learn to control our lives again
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,582
Oh, how I wish I had your insight at a such a young age Umbria.
Best thing is you are in a position where you can change now to lead and develop the life you have always wanted for yourself.
I truly hope you give the grog away, it is such a stupid and painful way to live and you deserve better.
Best thing is you are in a position where you can change now to lead and develop the life you have always wanted for yourself.
I truly hope you give the grog away, it is such a stupid and painful way to live and you deserve better.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Booze/drugs cause brain damage that the addict will feel for the rest of their life.
They will crave the buzz.
Even if someone quits for 10 years or longer, the crave will be there.
Social drinking leaves the door open.
I have been on this site for 5 years and not a single person has reported back that they decided they had a problem with booze/drugs and got it under control.
We are no different than folks that continue drinking/drugging except that we decided to stop and experience the rest of our lives without a drug addiction.
It can take years to normalize but along the way things get progressively better and better. It is amazing.
Thanks.
They will crave the buzz.
Even if someone quits for 10 years or longer, the crave will be there.
Social drinking leaves the door open.
I have been on this site for 5 years and not a single person has reported back that they decided they had a problem with booze/drugs and got it under control.
We are no different than folks that continue drinking/drugging except that we decided to stop and experience the rest of our lives without a drug addiction.
It can take years to normalize but along the way things get progressively better and better. It is amazing.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by UmbriaPunta
from 16-18 I could regularly go 5 days without drinking (which I know is not much but for my track record it is). I ended up at a very stressful university and after my 19th birthday, I slowly started drinking more and more until it became every day. I now usually drink 4 beers every night. I am not physically dependent but I am emotionally dependent, without a drink on a night, I fall into a spiral of anxiety and the few nights I do manage not to drink (maybe once a fortnight) I struggle a lot.
Most people here will tell you they wish they;d stopped at a young age. Even if you have a reluctance to quit right now, something bought you here - look around, read a little. There is life after drinking and its a good life
Yes, I wish I would have quit younger, because it was much harder to quit when I got older. If it was true that it wasn't that bad, the thing I didn't know was that it gets worse. For me this happened slowly, until 30 years later, I had a Hellish problem, which I could not control and years of trying to get it under control were wasted while instead of getting it under control, I just got worse ending in a downward spiraling nightmare.
I wish I would have quit early, because drinking was not destined to be a pleasurable pastime for me.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I was an alcoholic from my first drink. I always drank more, drank faster, drank more often than other people. Like you said, it started as The Way to forget the past but I had the compulsion and loved feeling that altered, tipsy, quiet-in-my-head feeling. By the time I was 18, my life was already spiraling out of control. As others said above, it gets worse the longer it progresses and it gets increasingly harder to pull back from the impending disaster. For a lot of us, there is a disaster. 
I just wanted to add that your anxiety is being made worse by drinking. I would guess you do have some level of dependency based on your story, and the sedative effect of the drug has now altered brain function enough so that you do need it to stay calmer. With a few months of sober time that heals.
Every one of us tried to go back to being able to drink one or two, but what's the point? We drink for the effect, and one or two once a month is not enough. Alcohol affects us differently than normal people.
No time like the present. I hope you stick around here, keep reading and keep posting.
I just wanted to add that your anxiety is being made worse by drinking. I would guess you do have some level of dependency based on your story, and the sedative effect of the drug has now altered brain function enough so that you do need it to stay calmer. With a few months of sober time that heals.
Every one of us tried to go back to being able to drink one or two, but what's the point? We drink for the effect, and one or two once a month is not enough. Alcohol affects us differently than normal people.
No time like the present. I hope you stick around here, keep reading and keep posting.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Cleveland
Posts: 320
First, congratulations on getting into a good university. Second, you absolutely may be an alcoholic at a young age. All you need to ask yourself is, can i drink normally? An alcoholic is just someone who cannot drink normally. Alcoholics are never able to drink normally and you may need to accept that. The great news is there are AA chapters all over the world and they are a great way to socialize and talk about your feelings until you have adapted to not drinking. Best of luck!
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