TexanJohn

Hey Y’all. I am getting sober after decades of alcohol abuse. I’ll add a more descriptive past to this post later but wanted to at least get a time line going...

How I got here: I grew up in a great family, parents were the life of the Party. So drinking was always fun in my mind. Yeah there were some rough nights but my parents were older. So when I got to my teens I naturally drank to have fun. I started losing my parents at 16, dad... then mom at 22.. Then my sister at 29... My sis is an addiction story for another day. But somewhere in the fun I was having, tragedy kept coming and I had to grow up, fast! But I continued drinking, heavily! I met my wife at 19, we partied and drank. She’s been through hell with me with the loss of family and really has seen me in some dark stuff. I gave up whiskey and stuck with beer in an attempt to slow down. That was a long time ago. I never really slowed down. Everything I did revolves around beer. I’ve done and said a lot I’m not proud of. But somehow just thought drinking was fun still.:.. We are nearing 40 and it’s time I part ways with alcohol. My family deserves better than what I have provided. My kids suffer, my wife is over it... I’m over it.::

10/18/20 Day 1: I woke up drunk today at 7AM. Alone in my bed. Where was my wife? Oh yeah, She’s pissed off again I bet.. Oh that’s right. I passed out Last night while we were watching a movie and managed to wet myself. Damn, I think she cleaned up the mess. Did she just make an excuse telling the kids that we spilled a drink on the recliner?! Sheesh.. We didn’t speak about it until 10:30am. I just hit the ground running to the coffee pot and off to work on chores. She finally cornered me and I just lost it. I’ve been telling myself I’m gonna die from this or lose my family for some time now. So I let it out. How I felt and how much I was really drinking. At least 2 cases a week, most of it on the weekends. I have to stop. All together. Now. I’ve promised her I can slow down or become a social drinker. I can’t. Never have, never will. Day 1 eve was ok, But I’m used to taking a day or two off during the week...

10/19 day 2: Monday. Off to work. Ate my feelings last night so my stomach was tore up from that and nerves I guess. Too bad it was a slow day. Just thought about this sobriety thing all day. But with podcasts and this forum, it’s been helpful. Came home to dinner and usual Monday night. Watching football. Researching what beer drinkers really drink when not drinking beer. Not sure NA beer would be good for me at this time but soda and water are fine for now. I am terrified about the upcoming weekend. I can remember a Friday or a Saturday night without 8+ beers... Ever..

BarbieKen

Welcome John,
Hey, by any chance a person in your life who is sober? Someone who you could talk to ...maybe meet at a Park or something this weekend? Of course,ALL Covid-19 safety guidelines in place.

Bobbi

tursiops999

Good choice on quitting, TexanJohn -- glad you're here. As for the weekend ... perhaps plan something fun to do for this Friday and Sat nite? After I quit drinking, I found it helpful just to have a specific activity planned for my "witching hour" -- for me it was 6 - 8 pm right after work. The plan can be anything that breaks up your routine, and gives you something to focus on besides drinking. Take the wife and kids out for a walk or a drive? Play a game or watch a movie together? You can do this -- and it helps to make a plan.

TexanJohn

Yes, I have a couple of guys I can lean on. If I can get the guts to do so!! 😬

least

It's hard the first few days but it will get a bit better after the physical withdrawal is over. As to what to drink, I like coffee and orange juice and that is sufficient for me.

You'll have to develop new habits and routines to replace the old drinking routines. It takes some effort, but sobriety is its own reward. And I never get tired of waking up sober and feeling good.

BarbieKen

I can only say for ME, listening to other sober alcoholics and sharing myself continues to be HUGE .... in my continued recovery. Believe it or not you will find similarities ( like peeing, passing out, pissed off spouses& kids). We, as they say, are not all that unique.

Laughter even comes when you share and hear others drunk stories ... LIVE, LAUGH & LEARN. I’ll be reading your posts, you are doing this sober life one day at a time, just like all of us. 🧡

Delilah1

Welcome to SR John! You will find lots of support on this forum. Are there things you enjoy to do on the weekend with your family? Maybe you can plan some sort of outdoor adventure.

Mizz

Hello, TexanJohn
You have come to the right place. Welcome!
The first few days of not drinking are pretty difficult for us alcoholics. With some time away from drinking you will start to feel a lot better in terms of anxiety, emotions and physically.

It is okay to take this one day at a time. The weekend is many days away. The only thing I really have is right here and right now. I cant think of what will happen four days from now.

It is encouraged by most to stick around and post often. Also, If you need more support in terms of getting sober there are many options. AA, SMART Recovery...

I post here and also attend AA meetings. So far so sober.

I am happy that you are here and I look forward to reading about your progress. YOU CAN DO THIS!

PinnacleOR

Oh yeah, about the pee. Peed while passed out on the sofa probably half a dozen times. And an equal amount in bed over my long drinking career. Glad I never have to experience that again.

TexanJohn

Thanks y’all! So far so sober! 🤪

Oh yeah... The other night was not the first time... I lost track years ago.... 😬👎🙄

PalmerSage

Welcome! One thing you may want to consider is joining the October 2020 thread on the main page, for people who are quitting this month. That was the single biggest asset for my recovery, making connections with people who were at the exact same stage as me. Other things that helped were to avoid alcohol at all costs (meaning physically, so not even looking at in the grocery store!), allowing myself to eat whatever I wanted at the beginning, and drinking lots of water. It might also help to have a specific plan for what you're going to do during the times you would normally drink (weekends especially) so there is no room for alcohol to try to sneak in. You can absolutely do this, and I'm definitely rooting for you!

luvchunk

Keep going brother.

Zebra1275

Welcome to SR!

After decades of drinking it's going to be very difficult to stop on your own. I've personally done the research on that many times.

I managed to stop before I started losing things, like my health, my wife, my family, my job etc. What finally got me sober was spending a lot of time on this website, and finally giving up on trying to do it by myself, and going to AA. Those were two key elements of my plan, but I did other stuff I did as well. You need a plan.

TexanJohn

10/20: Day 3... How is it only Tuesday?!? Another slower work day so spent time on here and reaching out to sober friends/family to lean on. Came home and just stayed busy with the boys and cooking dinner. Ran an errand for wifey... downing water and Diet Coke/7up like crazy. Cravings are coming on today. Slight headache. Could be sinus too... Still feeling pretty ok physically...

thanks again for all your help out there!!!

Hevyn

Good thing to stay busy, TexanJ. Those early days are filled with anxiety. Sounds like you're doing quite well - be proud of yourself.
(I had a headache & flu-like symptoms when withdrawing - it didn't last long.)

Sober45

Hi John. I was an everyday drinker for many years but today I’m going on 10 months sober. In the beginning I had to keep myself distracted constantly. I binge watched tv and ate whatever I wanted. Anything but alcohol. It was a bit scary indulging like that but it worked for me. I still indulge a bit too much but not like I did and I’m happy to be working on it.

My biggest gain so far is emotional stability. It’s like a huge weight has been lifted. It was not easy getting here but SO WORTH IT!

Stay close

gypsytears

Staying busy, podcasts, water, soda, SR, family... all good stuff. I got headaches in the early days but I also have sinus issues too. Hopefully you feel better soon. You’re almost to day 4!

TexanJohn

Thank y’all!

I think my body is used to spikes in alcohol from hammering them down on weekends then backing off during the week. We shall see, but yeah so far so good physically.

I have been eating a bit more but really craving the carbonation so more soda than usual! LOL

One day at a time!! 🤞🤞🤞

Hevyn

That's so good to hear, TJ. It can be a rough go the first few days.

TexanJohn

Day 4: Week is dragging for me. Still feel fine. Woke up at bit emotional on the drive in to work... Found the A.A. online zoom 24/7 and watched/listened to that a while this eve. Ran into Walmart for more diet 7up and they were out so grabbed some lime water and diet ginger ale.... Urges here strong this eve... grabbed a whiskey class and had a ginger ale on the rocks... so far so sober, y’all...