Patience this weekend? - Weekenders 16-18 October 2020
Magsie
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,681
Patience this weekend? - Weekenders 16-18 October 2020
I was playing a game of patience on my tablet this week. I do this when I think sometimes.
I noticed after a while I was playing by habit. And also I kept losing every time.
Pressing the replay button, time and time again. Losing the same game again and again.
Until I almost knew the sequence of the cards and knew I would lose because I was taking the same sequence again.
Eventually I’d have to win though wouldn’t I?
And then it registered.
If I kept doing what I was doing I would fail in winning my game.
To win, to succeed, I’d need to change my sequence, even though I thought I was doing everything right, I must be making an error somewhere?
I needed to take note and watch where I was going wrong which kept me failing the game, in order to succeed.
I likened this so much to trying to get sober.
Time and time again failure can be so easy, especially if we keep doing the same thing over and over again.
A new perspective, a new look at your hand. A change in course.
A new direction maybe.
And with the experience of failed attempts you can redirect to a sober trail.
If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!)
I noticed after a while I was playing by habit. And also I kept losing every time.
Pressing the replay button, time and time again. Losing the same game again and again.
Until I almost knew the sequence of the cards and knew I would lose because I was taking the same sequence again.
Eventually I’d have to win though wouldn’t I?
And then it registered.
If I kept doing what I was doing I would fail in winning my game.
To win, to succeed, I’d need to change my sequence, even though I thought I was doing everything right, I must be making an error somewhere?
I needed to take note and watch where I was going wrong which kept me failing the game, in order to succeed.
I likened this so much to trying to get sober.
Time and time again failure can be so easy, especially if we keep doing the same thing over and over again.
A new perspective, a new look at your hand. A change in course.
A new direction maybe.
And with the experience of failed attempts you can redirect to a sober trail.
If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!)
Hope you’re soon home. Get well soon. 
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,809
I'm in!
Welcome, Franklin! Stick around this weekend, we can help you if you feel like drinking. We have helped lot of people re-think taking that drink over the years!
Freedomfries, I hope you get some real help - I'm glad you're doing better.
The OP has me thinking. For years, I knew I had a serious drinking problem. I knew deep down that I needed to quit completely, but I kept trying to moderate. Years of trying the same tactics to moderate. I changed almost nothing about my habits and behaviors, and just tried to cut back on the drinking. I hung out in the same places, with the same people, and expected that I could just drink less. It wasn't until I decided to stop completely, and changed almost all of my old habits, stopped hanging around most of the people I drank with, that I was able to make the changes. Doing the same things over and over and expecting success is a losing proposition. You have to change your tactics.
Welcome, Franklin! Stick around this weekend, we can help you if you feel like drinking. We have helped lot of people re-think taking that drink over the years!
Freedomfries, I hope you get some real help - I'm glad you're doing better.
The OP has me thinking. For years, I knew I had a serious drinking problem. I knew deep down that I needed to quit completely, but I kept trying to moderate. Years of trying the same tactics to moderate. I changed almost nothing about my habits and behaviors, and just tried to cut back on the drinking. I hung out in the same places, with the same people, and expected that I could just drink less. It wasn't until I decided to stop completely, and changed almost all of my old habits, stopped hanging around most of the people I drank with, that I was able to make the changes. Doing the same things over and over and expecting success is a losing proposition. You have to change your tactics.
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,385
Hello Weekender types! Buddha taught that patient endurance, khanti, is the supreme incinerator of the defilements clouding our minds. And Gladys Knight and her Pips taught that you must imagine good reasons to keep on keeping on.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Welcome franklin and Lixie.
When I was newly trying prayer, I prayed for patience.
My N = 1 experience on that is that when I prayed for patience I was immediately given multiple huge opportunities to practice it.
In.
I've never heard this song before, I like it. One of the best things about sobriety is my much slower brain.
When I was newly trying prayer, I prayed for patience.
My N = 1 experience on that is that when I prayed for patience I was immediately given multiple huge opportunities to practice it.
In.
I've never heard this song before, I like it. One of the best things about sobriety is my much slower brain.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,060
Originally Posted by biminiblue 
When I was newly trying prayer, I prayed for patience.
My N = 1 experience on that is that when I prayed for patience I was immediately given multiple huge opportunities to practice it.
Thanks for the thread Mags.
Does anyone else think some people look like they are wearing converted bra cups on their faces?
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,202
In!
Thanks Mags, that is a really good analogy as changing what you do early on will still be having a big effect (ie not drinking) years later.
Welcome to Weekenders franklin1122 and Lixie. Congratulations on 4 days franklin! The weekends are harder than weekdays but the rewards are greater too.
Congratulations on getting to 5 weekends freedomfries, excellent job. Seizures and a whole lot of other bad stuff can be a thing of the past.
Great track from Gladys Knight, thanks Snazzy and good to see you.
Back in London just in time for greater Covid restrictions.
Thanks Mags, that is a really good analogy as changing what you do early on will still be having a big effect (ie not drinking) years later.
Welcome to Weekenders franklin1122 and Lixie. Congratulations on 4 days franklin! The weekends are harder than weekdays but the rewards are greater too.
Congratulations on getting to 5 weekends freedomfries, excellent job. Seizures and a whole lot of other bad stuff can be a thing of the past.
Great track from Gladys Knight, thanks Snazzy and good to see you.
Back in London just in time for greater Covid restrictions.
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