stickyone

Today is day 152

During my recovery one of the hardest things I had to do was forgive. I just couldn't wrap my head around showing compassion and forgiveness for the people that have hurt me or has caused me more pain during my recovery. This concept on forgiveness has helped m tremendously. Just because you forgive someone doesn't mean what they did wasn't wrong or it was right for them too do. It means no longer holding on to resentment towards that person. By not holding a resentment you are no longer holding on to the pass. This has allowed me move forward with the future.

During this last 5 months I've probably read more books than I did in the last 10 years. And probably watched alot more kids movies aswell. Lol have a wonderful day everyone

Anna

I'm glad to hear that you are understanding forgiveness and its benefits.

least

Congrats on your 152 days!

I read once that forgiveness is the fragrance of a violet on the heel of the one who crushed it.

Dee74

Congrats om your milestone stickyone - I agree about forgiveness...it brings great peace.

D

stickyone

Thank you everyone for the great responses. I look forward to continue my sobriety.

Bekindalways

I always appreciate thoughts on forgiveness . . . I'm not sure I totally understand it but I know it is important. With time I do forgive people . . . a bit harder to forgive myself . . . may I get there someday.

A monk once told me the first step in forgiveness is accepting that you aren't ready to forgive . . . I liked that. It seems a step most of us can take . . . I'm into low bar self improvement.

abraxas69

Many thanks for your post stickyone, true forgiveness (of others and myself) is something I still struggle with. I understand the WHY, and I get the WHAT (letting go of resentment etc, that doing so doesn't mean you condone what was done/said etc), but I am still struggling for it all to "click".

This! Thanks bekindalways. That strikes a chord. I heard a very similar thing in a meditation podcast about anger. That often we get in a funk because we are angry that we are angry. And by just accepting that it's ok to be angry is a good first step.

Thanks again for the post, it's been an unexpected and very welcome catalyst for some further introspection on the subject. :-)

biminiblue

I think...forgiveness isn't a one-and-done thing. I have many people who I have forgiven. They are no longer part of my life and that makes it easier. Then there are the people who I still need to deal with who are a little harder to forgive as a one-time thing because I have to keep dealing with them.

In both cases though, the mad thoughts about what they did still come up. I have to forgive them and pray for them AGAIN every time it comes up. Just like drinking thoughts, it isn't over the very first time I say it's over but in time when the angry thoughts come up I can dismiss them a lot faster. I remind myself I've forgiven them and I don't have to relive every detail of their betrayal. Letting go and not dwelling on them is the key.

The more I do that, the less they come up. I have resolved it to the satisfaction of my mind when I have made peace with the underlying emotion - which is usually fear masquerading as anger or resentment.

stickyone

Wow thanks for the responses everyone.