Afteradvice01

Hi, so sorry if this isn’t in the right channel or whatever I've not used forums for about 10 years.

I experienced some major life trauma about 8 years ago, and as a business owner I’ve kind of self-medicated for the last 8 years using alcohol and marijuana whilst maintaining to function. 90% of the time this had minor impacts on my life (reduced energy, sex drive, dependence etc) and the obvious 10% of crazy impact that such a lifestyle can bring.

My use isn’t and hasn’t ever been “heavy” but it is heavy enough to bring negative consequences.

Having major stress in my life constantly (business, money etc) has led me to a position where I cant ever sleep without 1 or the other or even go a day. I am also slightly (or more than, depending on tests because the online ones rate me highly) autistic so this makes it difficult for me to connect with people.

I'm just looking for advice and self-care options. I also get bored VERY easily. My lifestyle is on computers so I do fit in 1 hour of exercise a day usually which doesn’t really cure my boredom for the rest of the time hence drinking and smoking.

Need experienced advice on how to get through this.

boreas

Welcome!

Alcohol was my coping mechanism for a long time. There is no aspect of my life that didn’t improve once I got sober.

I have learned that I love running. It is something I never did while drinking, but has become a passion now. I’m not any good at it, but it brings me joy.

You just never know until you try new things.
Glad you’re here...
-bora

Anna

Many people use alcohol to self-medicate mental health issues so you are not alone. It was during a particularly stressful time when I was really struggling with insomnia, that my drinking crossed the line. I became convinced that I needed alcohol to help me sleep, and I was pulled in and became convinced I wouldn't be able to sleep without it. Ironically, my drinking soon made my sleep worse than ever and I woke up with anxiety every morning. Have faith that you can stop drinking, feel better physically and mentally and sleep better.

We have compiled a list of things to do when we're bored and hopefully you can find something on this list that appeals to you:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ething-do.html (Looking For Something To Do?)

RecklessDrunk

Hopefully the regulars here aren't sick of me repeating this yet. I look at alcoholism as 2 parts. One is sort of an allergy to alcohol. Once i start drinking i can not control how much i drink or what i will do. 2nd is an obsession to drink alcohol.

By highly autistic do you mean Asperger's? I scored pretty high on those quizzes. Listening to people describe it i was amazed how much they are like me. I never knew I had it until my 40s! Actually my girlfriend at the time figured it out right away, what years of child psychologist back in the 80s never could. I was given all kinds of meds and shipped from reform school to reform school not knowing why I'm different. I actually did better in college and the real World then k through 12. Even through decades of drug and alcohol abuse.

At least for me marijuana was really terrible. As an Aspy my awareness was already screwed up and marijuana made me paranoid. Maybe like the way my husky use to intentionally mis behave and make me chase her. I kind of liked the paranoia of being stoned. The adventure of a weed high. Weed always made me drink. Real stoners would look at me confused when I would say I'm too high, I need a few beers so that I can safely drive my car because I'm just too stoned to think!

I use to drink at least a few beers every night for a period of about 10 years. To deal with the allergy I speak of i would take OTC sleeping pills early on so that I wouldn't get all drunk and crazy on a normal weeknight. Weekends I would get wasted, about every single weekend night.

Where Asperger's came as a strentgh was my ability to schedule and plan. I would plan out all my meals, workouts, work, school, whatever I needed. Because of my diet schedule i started drinking only on weekends. This actually worked well most of the time. I say most in that i could go weeks without a mistake but every now and then that obsession would kick in. I'd be drunk on a weekday and may binge for days. The weekend drinking got worse, eventually I got worse. I think sub consciously my brain wanted to slam alcohol while it could. I fell back into hard drugs but only craved hard drugs after drinking.

I stopped smoking weed daily while I was still drinking. Unlike alcohol I could taper off weed. I stopped buying it and got down to roaches and resin, just a couple hits a day until I didn't really need it anymore.

To get sober i went to AA, got a sponsor, and worked the steps. Once I started reading the big book of alcoholics anonymous it started making sense. I used my ability to schedule and plan as a strength. I was able to overcome the obsession getting in the way. I take on my daily schedule with cold hearted precision.

Search Google for the big book of alcoholics anonymous. Get a free PDF. I would recommend looking at "There is a Solution " to begin.

See if you relate to this stuff. Non alcohics do not relate. If you can relate good news, you'll probably find the literature really interesting. Bad news you might be alcoholic. Its not all bad. Possibly the road of excess has led you to the palace of wisdom.

Sober45

Welcome aboard. I currently smoke weed and I just reached 8 months sober from alcohol. I am also on the spectrum.

I was self medicating with weed on my own since my 20s but in my early 40s I seen a psychiatrist who prescribed medical grade. Since then I have Had control over what I’m taking. I mostly use CBD.

Eventually I’d like to be free of cannabis but I chose to quit alcohol first because it was doing the most damage. My addiction to alcohol was more progressive.

if you think you can drop both, I would give it a go. If not, Maybe start with the one you think is hurting you most.

I will say this, the sober journey is worth it!

PalmerSage

Welcome back - are you currently seeing a therapist to address issues that come up as a result of your autism? It would be a good idea to see a psychologist, if you haven't already, to get a diagnosis and see what treatment/therapy/coping skills/medications will benefit you, in addition to addressing the trauma and stress you mentioned. While drinking, I always felt extremely anxious and that alcohol was the only thing "helping" me - it was pretty amazing how different I felt after a year or two without alcohol, and realized that it was actually exacerbating my anxiety pretty significantly! Stopping drinking and getting sober will help you sort out a lot. Good luck, and we're here for you!

D122y

There is no easy way out.

Step 1 was wanting to quit. My bp was off the scale, i was fat, mentally unstable, etc etc.

Step 2 was suffering. I suffered so hard that if I didn't want to quit more than anything I would have never made it.

SR was my saving grace. Without this place teaching me what I was dealing with, I would have relapsed 10x over.

Exercise is/was my goto therapy. No rx drugs or counseling.

Suffering and time.

The AV will do and say anything....anything...to get a drink.

Anything I think or do to relapse was part of the trigger chain.

Thanks.

LumenandNyx

Hi,

My advice is to stop smoking and to stop drinking. Your "use" is severe enough to bring about negative consequences. That's a problem. You might not be able to sleep, but you can absolutely stop picking up a drink and a drag.

You can think about all the causes, diagnosis, reasons, stressors and life in general - later. None of it is going anywhere anyway. And if you get bored so easily, find things to do that speak to your heart. That's your job. No one knows what speaks to your heart but you.

Now might be a good time to start looking at your life through the eyes of the adult that you are.

Dee74

Hi afteradvice01
My advice is to stop drinking alcohol and smoking weed.

I know thats probably a terrifying prospect for you mentally, but there are many of us here who have done just that - I would never go back - my life is not blissful and without problems or stress - noones is - but things are immeasurably better in every way.

Others here may have been able to tackle things one at a time, but I have to be honest and say that is not my story.

I smoked weed and drank alcohol too - and smoked cigarettes for many years.
I had to tackle everything at once because they were all interconnected...when I was drunk I wanted to be high and vice versa.

It may seem like a massive task but it really wasn't as scary as I though it would be - hard work at times but I'm guessing you're not afraid of hard work

Freedom awaits

brighterday1234

Total abstinence is the only way to truly recover in my experience.