Notices

Well, I found a way to remain sober...

Old 08-16-2020, 12:02 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Well, I found a way to remain sober...

And that is to be so damn tired, hungry and exhausted that drinking doesn't enter the thought process. Only eating and sleep at the moment is what sounds good to me. I find it a daily challenge and its sometimes painful, but kind of fun. My entire life is upside down right now. But I have committed to push through it, if that makes any sense.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 12:53 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,043
Nothing wrong with hard work but I hope things settle down & balance out a bit Jeff - and that your resolve not to drink remains the same

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 05:06 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
To say that my life is upside down right now is probably not fair. Its not upside down, its just different. Busy, and a good busy.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 05:27 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Life Goes On
 
Obladi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Hey Jeff,

Sounds like you're still sober? That's good.

Exhaustion is an ok strategy for starters, but it's not really sustainable as a long term strategy.

What are you doing extra or upside down to help your self, the true you on the inside?

O
Obladi is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 05:56 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
LOL....This eventually needs to stop....I know for me it is very hard for me to "sit with myself and my thoughts" so I tend to over do it....
But, if this is working for you right now...I say whatever works.
Misssy2 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 07:10 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,328
I hope you get used to the new, busy life, Jeff. I'm glad you're doing well.
Anna is online now  
Old 08-16-2020, 07:31 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
Hey Jeff,

Sounds like you're still sober? That's good.

Exhaustion is an ok strategy for starters, but it's not really sustainable as a long term strategy.

What are you doing extra or upside down to help your self, the true you on the inside?

O
Yes, I am sober and its great. I have said before that I really like being sober but I have demons, and sometimes the demons win. I'm in a different place right now and its a good place, very challenging, but probably considered "normal" by most standards.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 08:43 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Life Goes On
 
Obladi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
Yes, I am sober and its great. I have said before that I really like being sober but I have demons, and sometimes the demons win. I'm in a different place right now and its a good place, very challenging, but probably considered "normal" by most standards.
That's excellent - the sober part.

And yes, I remember your demons well. They look a lot like mine. They needn't win anymore, you know. (You used current/future tense, and that's concerning.) But they are not likely to stay away unless you do something to address them. Well, at least that's my experience and seems to be yours too. I know this may be annoying, but I'm going to continue to suggest that you get additional help. SR has been an invaluable resource in my recovery, but I firmly believe I wouldn't be where I am today without the right therapist, medication, reading (esp Lance Dodes "The Heart of Addiction) and - gasp! - the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I gasp at the last because it's been very very difficult to find my place there. And doing just that was key - I needed to be true to myself within that group of people who are infuriatingly human sometimes. Just like I am.

I'm not saying you need AA; I'm saying you may benefit from it. Nor am I saying you need therapy though from where I sit it sure looks like you'd be able to find a hell of a lot of growth and relief with the right guy (or gal). That's my experience, anyhow. As a fellow survivor of my family of origin and other childhood terrors including lifelong anxiety and depression, I firmly believe I would've likely ended up dead long before my time if I hadn't worked through those things with a good therapist. I want that freedom for you too, Jeff. It's really a pain in the rear end to have to do these things that "normal" people don't need to do, but here we are. At least here I am. Those demons aren't likely to ever go away completely, but I can learn to coexist peacefully with them. So can you.

O

(Does it go without saying "or else?")
Obladi is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 08:47 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: I'm sitting right here ...
Posts: 918
Originally Posted by thomas11 View Post
And that is to be so damn tired, hungry and exhausted that drinking doesn't enter the thought process. Only eating and sleep at the moment is what sounds good to me. I find it a daily challenge and its sometimes painful, but kind of fun. My entire life is upside down right now. But I have committed to push through it, if that makes any sense.
Have you turned off your craving for alcohol in favor of starving yourself? Because that's no good. You have to eat.
You find it a daily challenge to not eat or sleep, yet find it kind of fun?

Okay, that's just disturbing.

Have you discussed this with anyone? Because I think you should. It's alarming.

I'm really hoping that I've misunderstood your post ...
LumenandNyx is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 10:22 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
That's excellent - the sober part.

And yes, I remember your demons well. They look a lot like mine. They needn't win anymore, you know. (You used current/future tense, and that's concerning.) But they are not likely to stay away unless you do something to address them. Well, at least that's my experience and seems to be yours too. I know this may be annoying, but I'm going to continue to suggest that you get additional help. SR has been an invaluable resource in my recovery, but I firmly believe I wouldn't be where I am today without the right therapist, medication, reading (esp Lance Dodes "The Heart of Addiction) and - gasp! - the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I gasp at the last because it's been very very difficult to find my place there. And doing just that was key - I needed to be true to myself within that group of people who are infuriatingly human sometimes. Just like I am.

I'm not saying you need AA; I'm saying you may benefit from it. Nor am I saying you need therapy though from where I sit it sure looks like you'd be able to find a hell of a lot of growth and relief with the right guy (or gal). That's my experience, anyhow. As a fellow survivor of my family of origin and other childhood terrors including lifelong anxiety and depression, I firmly believe I would've likely ended up dead long before my time if I hadn't worked through those things with a good therapist. I want that freedom for you too, Jeff. It's really a pain in the rear end to have to do these things that "normal" people don't need to do, but here we are. At least here I am. Those demons aren't likely to ever go away completely, but I can learn to coexist peacefully with them. So can you.

O

(Does it go without saying "or else?")
I did see a therapist this spring for awhile and it helped my mental health by leaps and bounds. I plan to return. In time.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 10:25 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by LumenandNyx View Post
Have you turned off your craving for alcohol in favor of starving yourself? Because that's no good. You have to eat.
You find it a daily challenge to not eat or sleep, yet find it kind of fun?

Okay, that's just disturbing.

Have you discussed this with anyone? Because I think you should. It's alarming.

I'm really hoping that I've misunderstood your post ...
I think maybe you misunderstood my post. I started a new job after not working for almost 5 years. Its a bit physically demanding and I come home tired and hungry and it feels good. I'm adjusting to the new workload and it leaves me pretty exhausted by weeks end. I'm not starving myself or denying myself sleep at all. I see good things in my future if things continue this way.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 08-16-2020, 10:32 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
Hawkeye13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,372
Glad you are back working Jeff--I know being unemployed was a terrible stress for you.
You are doing the next right thing, and then the next.

That's a string of wins, or as they say in the vernacular, a winning streak
Hawkeye13 is online now  
Old 08-16-2020, 10:51 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Hawkeye13 View Post
Glad you are back working Jeff--I know being unemployed was a terrible stress for you.
You are doing the next right thing, and then the next.

That's a string of wins, or as they say in the vernacular, a winning streak
Thanks Hawkeye, encouragement means a lot to me right now.
thomas11 is offline  
Old 08-17-2020, 04:34 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sober45's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,100
I applaud you for the strides you are making and for your ability to take in constructive criticism. I’m learning a lot by following your journey. So much gratitude to you today.
Sober45 is offline  
Old 08-17-2020, 08:19 AM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
Gabe1980's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Keeping busy is great Thomas but watch you don't over do things. Self-care is so important and getting the balance right. Sounds like you are doing a great job at staying sober though......good for you
Gabe1980 is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:58 AM.