thomas11

As I mentioned before, all of you are too kind for remembering about my new job and work day etc....When I say "double edged sword" I simply mean that since I have not worked for so long I am so sore and I come home pooped. The other side of that is that I am happy to be making a living wage, so its worth it. Its a love/hate relationship. I like working because it makes me feel worthy, but I cuss my life out because I need to hit the gym before I go. At 53 years old, grinding out a workout and then hammering out an 8 hr shift doing actual work is tough, but I'll adjust. So many folks have if much worse. FYI for newbies, if you remain sober, you can do so much more than you think. So much more.

The most beautiful thing in all of this is that my phone does not ring at all hrs of the night (I used to own a business) and when I leave work, I'm done. Its very nice.

Surrendered19

It is amazing how we change in our 50's right? The energy just isn't there like it was when we were young. But every day, I feel so much better, even on my worst days, than I did on my best days drinking.

D122y

Being in charge is not for me, unless I get paid well for it.

Being a talking head for corporate, having to say yes all the time, and working from home on top of working at work, never appealed to me.

Basically, I am not management material. It has to be something in a persons core. If there is any doubt, real managers can sniff it out like the living hiding in the zombies.

I have had such a cool job for so long, specifically typically over paid and under worked, I am pretty sure I could not do a real job ever again.

This "easy life" definitely supported my addiction to booze ramping up. It was the culture in my sick mind.

Folks that work hard, e.g. dangerous work, two jobs etc, tend to not be able to get to my level of addiction. They don't have the time for it.

Thanks.

Anna

Thanks for the update, Thomas. I'm glad things are going well, and I'm sure you'll get used to the physical aspect of your new job soon.

RecklessDrunk

Fortunately I haven't had to change jobs much over the years, knock on wood.

Over 2 years in current job but I had some consulting stuff just before that so I was seeing different environments and working some places im not used to.

One thing was no different from the roughly 20 years before. The first day on the new job is the slowest time moves. At least for me a lot of it is psychological. It's like the first few weeks you hit a level where its a little more routine and I'm a little more adapted. It seems to take several months though to get to where it seems the day is really a piece of cake..

I'm the kind of person that needs to be busy all day and it seems to take time for my true work role to develop. Then it redevelops over the years.

SoberLeigh

Good stuff, Jeff. It is really great to hear that you are doing well.

MaximusD

Thomas, going to the gym and putting in an 8 hour day is tough for EVERYONE Keep it up!

Dee74

I'm glad you're rising to the challenge Jeff - congrats

D

thomas11

D122, you need to give yourself more credit. You've been through a lot.

thomas11

Oh its a challenge Dee. I came home 3 of the 4 days this first week absolutely beat. I went into the hot tub last night (god bless, I have one). Slept many hours today and ate a ton of food. Back to a "normal" life.

Delilah1

I’m glad things are going well Jeff.

lessgravity

Good stuff Jeff. Work is a good thing, good work a better thing. Congrats on the sober time.

thomas11

I know its early, but I like my current sobriety. Life is pretty good right now, and its up to me to keep going forward one step at a time. No screwing up this time. The lockdown was very hard on me.

thomas11

There is something to be said for being genuinely tired and hungry. Food tastes better and sleep feels better. Because it has been earned.

stickyone

True , and 8 hours of hard work and working out before is great. It would be hard for anyone I'm about 10 years younger than you, and that's hard for me. I look forward to having my lunch prepared through out the day. So after training then off to work I would refuel with food through out the day. When you get off work the day is complete a nice shower then some mediation and a nice story book. That's a nice well earned sleep. Congrats

Obladi

in my experience, the first week or two back at work are always extremely taxing. It gets better, for sure. Glad you're savoring food and sleep - they do a body good.

I'm also happy to see you're on the other side of this, Jeff. Now is the time to add things specifically aimed to shore up your mental well-being. Have you given that any thought?

For me, I used to have a tendency to "forget" about the bad times once I started doing better. I learned that shutting the door on that messy closet was only a temporary fix. The blasted thing would pop open seemingly . without warning and there I'd be in hell again. It's tedious hard labor to sort it all out, but it's so worth the effort.

xo
O