Trying again
Member
Join Date: Feb 2020
Location: Eastern US
Posts: 1,386
Stable, welcome back! I understand what you mean as a blip. You are staying positive and I get it. I do the same with my relapses though I also acknowledge that any relapse can be a BAD one where bad consequences happen. I found that making quitting drinking priority over everything helped. You have to find a way to deal with the stress another way. For me it is excersise. Either way, you may have to power through a few stressful events before your brain resets that stress=drinking pathway. Good luck and we are all here for you!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 739
Originally Posted by Sober45 
Replacements were huge for me. I have 7 months now after many years of trying.
For me, replacing the sedation of alcohol with things like exercise and housework didn't work very well (at first). I ended up picking things that gave me physical pleasure...junk food and hot baths and then getting adsorbed into something on TV. I just vegged and filled my gut with sugar. I also drank a lot of juice (thereby replacing the hand-to-mouth habit and something cool going down my throat). I guess you could say I've been tricking my brain.
My mother is a heavy drinker (rum every night). A few years ago, my father played a trick on her. He served her 3 virgins. Guess what? She thought she was drunk..even commented on how nice the drinks were. When he told her they were virgins, she didn't believe it. There have been experiments done on this in the psychology filed. I know there is one on youtube as I watched it years ago and this was were the idea came from to trick my mother.
Now, I don't think about alcohol much at all. But I loves me some chocolate, a bag of chips and movie at days end. The way I look at it is I have to have some pleasure in life. My plan now is to wait until 7:30 pm before I relax. I get off at 4 so that's 3.5 hours to fill. I'll focus on getting as many chores done as I can. It's not perfect but I'm definitely moving in the right direction. I'm cutting back on the sugar a little now too.
Oh, and gratitude...I practice that every day. Especially when I'm feeling down, I'll just stop and take a moment to reflect on the good things in my life...like being sober.
My mind can't handle the "never again" very well either. So, i've told myself I can drink again at 75...for some reason that thought gets rid of the urge.
You have to TRUST and KNOW that if you stick this out for the long term, your life will be better, because it will!
For me, replacing the sedation of alcohol with things like exercise and housework didn't work very well (at first). I ended up picking things that gave me physical pleasure...junk food and hot baths and then getting adsorbed into something on TV. I just vegged and filled my gut with sugar. I also drank a lot of juice (thereby replacing the hand-to-mouth habit and something cool going down my throat). I guess you could say I've been tricking my brain.
My mother is a heavy drinker (rum every night). A few years ago, my father played a trick on her. He served her 3 virgins. Guess what? She thought she was drunk..even commented on how nice the drinks were. When he told her they were virgins, she didn't believe it. There have been experiments done on this in the psychology filed. I know there is one on youtube as I watched it years ago and this was were the idea came from to trick my mother.
Now, I don't think about alcohol much at all. But I loves me some chocolate, a bag of chips and movie at days end. The way I look at it is I have to have some pleasure in life. My plan now is to wait until 7:30 pm before I relax. I get off at 4 so that's 3.5 hours to fill. I'll focus on getting as many chores done as I can. It's not perfect but I'm definitely moving in the right direction. I'm cutting back on the sugar a little now too.
Oh, and gratitude...I practice that every day. Especially when I'm feeling down, I'll just stop and take a moment to reflect on the good things in my life...like being sober.
My mind can't handle the "never again" very well either. So, i've told myself I can drink again at 75...for some reason that thought gets rid of the urge.
You have to TRUST and KNOW that if you stick this out for the long term, your life will be better, because it will!
The bolded bit I can very much equate too. I spent the whole of 2018 and 2019 telling myself "never again" and the only thing it achieved was hundreds of "One last time" days. So I like your idea of allowing your brain the option to drink again at 75. Even telling my brain I can drink at 200 ( an age obv we cant achieve ) would calm my brain more than "never again".
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
I never denied myself people, places, or things (other than booze) when I quit.
It was tough, but it hardened me. Since I was in and around booze in my earliest days clean, now it is that much easier.
I will never say that booze is not a problem. Booze is a huge problem for me and it will always be a problem.
I don't make a big deal about it outside of my mind. Nobody knows. Some folks tell me how much strength I have to not drink during festive situations. When challenged, I say it is not my thing anymore.
I don't get invited to some get together s any more because the host has decided that for whatever reason. It hurts, but it doesn't hurt enough to get me to relapse and harm my temple any more than it is already irreversibly damaged.
Drinking was a learned behavior. It has been unlearned.
Thanks.
It was tough, but it hardened me. Since I was in and around booze in my earliest days clean, now it is that much easier.
I will never say that booze is not a problem. Booze is a huge problem for me and it will always be a problem.
I don't make a big deal about it outside of my mind. Nobody knows. Some folks tell me how much strength I have to not drink during festive situations. When challenged, I say it is not my thing anymore.
I don't get invited to some get together s any more because the host has decided that for whatever reason. It hurts, but it doesn't hurt enough to get me to relapse and harm my temple any more than it is already irreversibly damaged.
Drinking was a learned behavior. It has been unlearned.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,922
Originally Posted by D122y
I don't get invited to some get together s any more because the host has decided that
Keep doing what you’re doing, D122y. You’re doing just fine.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Originally Posted by Dee74
I'm sorry you have to deal with that d122y. I did too but I made new, better, friends.
Maybe you can too?
D
Maybe you can too?
D
Originally Posted by Hodd
That’s appalling, D122y. It’s that host’s loss, and he/she doesn’t sound like anyone worth your time ever again. My friends know I stopped drinking, and they’re fine about it. In fact, if I ever got tempted to drink (never say never), they’d snatch the drink out my hand. Now I stopped drinking, I’m in all honesty a more interested person anyway so have a better social life. Looking back, I wasn’t always invited as I was that guy who just drank.
Keep doing what you’re doing, D122y. You’re doing just fine.
Keep doing what you’re doing, D122y. You’re doing just fine.
The main folks that relate most to me are here and at my local AA chapters. With my work schedule, I have more time these days. I find myself watching TV for hours.
My family relationship over the years has prepared me for feeling alone.
I get sad, but I am not depressed. I really look forward to the future and being retired soon enough.
My job seems so easy these days that walking away is not the best idea.
Thanks folks.
Thanks.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
