Almost to a year!!!!!!!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 244
Almost to a year!!!!!!!!
I've learned so much, not only about myself, but about the world of recovery. I learned to finally not care about what other people think about my recovery process - was hard for me to let that go.
I've also been done with AA for a few months now. As I always say, AA was a lifesaver for me when I got out of treatment. Those first few months couldn't have happened without the support I got from AA. Things are different now. I've been fortunate to build an amazing support network around me, and I'm now able to give support back as well.
I had a horrific, yet comical, last AA meeting that really brought everything to a head for me. I was told I'm a "dry drunk" because I'm not working the steps. Well, if I'm a "dry drunk", this isn't a bad place to be!!!!! I'm happy, I'm healthy, I'm in the best shape of my life - and I'm sober. I've spent much of the past year focusing on my recovery, which early on, was extremely essential. I'm now at a place where I don't need to think about it all the time - it seems like a past life sometimes. My social life is filled almost 100% with people that are sober - and if I start to backside I have support ready. Drinking was my focus for so long - not drinking has been my focus for almost a year - slowly putting my focus back on living life has been amazing!
I'm really just here to celebrate my sobriety. I've given myself a great 39th birthday present 🎁 I know many people will want to tell me I'm doing it wrong - which is why I'm done with AA. I have never, and would never, tell anyone they are doing sobriety wrong if they are sober and moving in a positive direction with their life - please give me the same courtesy.
Here's to almost a year, and several more to follow! Stay strong - I know it's an insane time right now 💙
Donnylutz 💖
I've also been done with AA for a few months now. As I always say, AA was a lifesaver for me when I got out of treatment. Those first few months couldn't have happened without the support I got from AA. Things are different now. I've been fortunate to build an amazing support network around me, and I'm now able to give support back as well.
I had a horrific, yet comical, last AA meeting that really brought everything to a head for me. I was told I'm a "dry drunk" because I'm not working the steps. Well, if I'm a "dry drunk", this isn't a bad place to be!!!!! I'm happy, I'm healthy, I'm in the best shape of my life - and I'm sober. I've spent much of the past year focusing on my recovery, which early on, was extremely essential. I'm now at a place where I don't need to think about it all the time - it seems like a past life sometimes. My social life is filled almost 100% with people that are sober - and if I start to backside I have support ready. Drinking was my focus for so long - not drinking has been my focus for almost a year - slowly putting my focus back on living life has been amazing!
I'm really just here to celebrate my sobriety. I've given myself a great 39th birthday present 🎁 I know many people will want to tell me I'm doing it wrong - which is why I'm done with AA. I have never, and would never, tell anyone they are doing sobriety wrong if they are sober and moving in a positive direction with their life - please give me the same courtesy.
Here's to almost a year, and several more to follow! Stay strong - I know it's an insane time right now 💙
Donnylutz 💖
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Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
Great post Donnylutz. It sounds like you are working a solid recovery plan. I don't do AA, but I know many AA'ers who love AA but would not like their fellow-AA'ers being so dogmatic about the steps. But regardless, you have found what works for you. That is great news Donny!!!
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Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,922
Sounds like I’ve been a dry drunk for 18 months 🤪😊
People told me I was doing it wrong and needed a plan, etc. Sounds like you’ve done the same as me and turned your life around and can see that drinking again will unravel all that. That sounds like a plan.
Huge well done, Donny 👍
People told me I was doing it wrong and needed a plan, etc. Sounds like you’ve done the same as me and turned your life around and can see that drinking again will unravel all that. That sounds like a plan.
Huge well done, Donny 👍
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Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
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Not wishing to derail your thread, Donny, but I just looked at some definitions of dry drunk. I sort of get it although not really. It’s basically someone who doesn’t drink anymore but retains all the other bad habits. I really don’t get it. That person’s cravings will subside whilst they’re not drinking regardless of what else they’re getting up to. I’d define a dry drunk as someone who doesn’t drink but sure as hell wants to and never loses those day 1 cravings. The textbook definition of dry drunk goes deeper, but for someone to say that to you, Donny, is unacceptable. You did well to walk away, and you’re doing even better coming up to one year 👍
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 244
Originally Posted by Hodd 
Not wishing to derail your thread, Donny, but I just looked at some definitions of dry drunk. I sort of get it although not really. It’s basically someone who doesn’t drink anymore but retains all the other bad habits. I really don’t get it. That person’s cravings will subside whilst they’re not drinking regardless of what else they’re getting up to. I’d define a dry drunk as someone who doesn’t drink but sure as hell wants to and never loses those day 1 cravings. The textbook definition of dry drunk goes deeper, but for someone to say that to you, Donny, is unacceptable. You did well to walk away, and you’re doing even better coming up to one year 👍
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 741
I dont think you need to even set foot in an AA meeting to get sober and not be a "dry drunk". To even prove someone is a dry drunk is pretty much impossible as of today's technology that I know of. You'd need some kind of mind reading software.
I instantly felt better after my first AA meeting. Even without the steps it can be helpful. There is a bit of a my way is the only way that can work approach in AA which can put people off. I don't agree with it but I understand it, for some it's the only way and they think this they are helping. In some cases they are. Sometimes its impossible to know the right or wrong answer in someone else's recovery.
In defense of AA I would say the true program of AA is to get a sponsor and work the steps. Some people do need it. I went that route, it's kind of the give the most people the best chance of success route. I've heard of people going to meetings, not working the steps, and then say AA doesn't work. So in some cases I think the program of AA gets unfair criticism.
I'm a fan of the get a sponsor work the steps approach but like they say we can only give SUGGESTIONS.
I instantly felt better after my first AA meeting. Even without the steps it can be helpful. There is a bit of a my way is the only way that can work approach in AA which can put people off. I don't agree with it but I understand it, for some it's the only way and they think this they are helping. In some cases they are. Sometimes its impossible to know the right or wrong answer in someone else's recovery.
In defense of AA I would say the true program of AA is to get a sponsor and work the steps. Some people do need it. I went that route, it's kind of the give the most people the best chance of success route. I've heard of people going to meetings, not working the steps, and then say AA doesn't work. So in some cases I think the program of AA gets unfair criticism.
I'm a fan of the get a sponsor work the steps approach but like they say we can only give SUGGESTIONS.
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Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 463
Cool beans, bro!
I can relate.
I successfully completed a 1 year outpatient program, combined with a mandatory 1 year of tons of AA meetings...signed attendance cards required.
Made a lot of friends in AA, but never did the steps. I see some of the folks once in awhile and am grateful for the tidbits I took away from those meetings.
I hit 20 months sobriety today, by the way.
Keep up the sober lifestyle. Congratulations to you.
I can relate.
I successfully completed a 1 year outpatient program, combined with a mandatory 1 year of tons of AA meetings...signed attendance cards required.
Made a lot of friends in AA, but never did the steps. I see some of the folks once in awhile and am grateful for the tidbits I took away from those meetings.
I hit 20 months sobriety today, by the way.
Keep up the sober lifestyle. Congratulations to you.
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,036
Congratulations!! The one year mark is such an exciting milestone, and something to be very proud of. I remember feeling very emotional (happy emotions) that day. I had the feeling that I could do anything. Make sure you do something to celebrate this huge milestone!
❤️ Delilah
❤️ Delilah
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Join Date: Feb 2020
Location: Eastern US
Posts: 1,386
Yeah, I don't think I could do AA myself. Again, just some bad seeds in an otherwise good organization that has helped millions. Who cares how you are doing it if it is working for you! Congratulations!
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Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,922
Sorry to dwell on the dry drunk comment, I still maintain the individual(s) who said that were out of order, but I’m assuming and hoping that was an isolated incident. Most people are mature enough to accept that their methods in general are different to those of others. Whatever works works.
As far as I know, I didn’t do anything wrong or anti-social, but I did drink too much in the evening. I replaced this with exercise and other more useful pastimes. Whilst I’ve been busy living, my urge has been busy dying. However, my brain chemistry has been rearranged to make me an alcoholic in remission. No program on earth can fix that.
As far as I know, I didn’t do anything wrong or anti-social, but I did drink too much in the evening. I replaced this with exercise and other more useful pastimes. Whilst I’ve been busy living, my urge has been busy dying. However, my brain chemistry has been rearranged to make me an alcoholic in remission. No program on earth can fix that.
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