BritGal

Well done Beav!! :-)

Beav20

Hey All. Sorry to say I had a slip up on Saturday. Very long work week and let my guard down. Started for a few beers with a mate. 3.5 pints in i realised what on earth I was doing and immediately stopped.

Bruised Ego and anxious about kinderling.

Its almost 48 hours since I stopped. I feel OK and the local drug and alchol service say I should be fine. Just worried I'm going to have a seizure in my sleep etc.

Just feel a fool that I'm anxious again.

Sigh.

Beav20

Just feel like a failure and that I've let everyone down.

CaptainHaddock

Sorry to hear that, Beav. Good that you brought it to an end whilst still in the midst of it. With regard to myself, I had to be vigilant if something like that happened. I might be good for another 3 even 4 weeks, then another slip a week later and I know where it can go from there.

Glad you are back right away and wish you the best. This doesn’t erase the sober time that you accumulated and all you learnt from it. Many will say you shouldn’t spend too much time on regret and resentment, as it won’t change things that much.

Beav20

Thanks so much. I knew I was feeling a bit burnt out but we was trying to hard at work to rebuild after the lockdown so I pushed myself beyond what I should. Mentally drained and didnt have the mental strength to double check myself.

I've learnt that I dont function well as a human if I'm low on sleep. I've also been on a diet since rehab. Lost 8 to 9 pounds but was feeling tired from the diet also.

I guess old beav is not a robot and i pushed myself beyond my limit.

Ranting abit but helps to get it down on "paper" and not round and round my head.

Beav

MaximusD

Just get right back at it Beav. Sounds like you were able to stop the slip much quicker than most and that is a victory!

Dee74

Hey Beav

sorry you drank, man. I think it’s really important to have a support network and use it, even when you’re going gangbusters And racking up the days because that one moment of madness ‘I can drink a little’ can happen to us all and we need to have a strategy in place to make the right decision.

I don’t think you let anybody down, and you are definitely not a failure . Weunderstand how it is here - we’re just glad you’re back

Beav20

Thanks so much all for the kind words. I suffer terribly from anxiety and reading online about Kindling and sezuires is messing me up. Any knowledge on the subject or experiences would mean so much.

Dee74

I'd stop reading Dr Google etc. Kindling and seizures do happen, but so do withdrawals with no real problems.
If you are really anxious or worried why not check in with your Dr?

D

copperfield

Congrats on 11 days!

neferkamichael

Beav20, do your best not to say negative things about yourself, just makes it all the much harder. Rootin for ya.

BeABetterMan

Hang in there BigDave. It’s not a race and we all recover at our own pace.

Beav20

Thanks so much all of you. I'm committed as ever to ensure it was just a slip up. No drinking today and will attend a meeting tonight.

Beav20

Hello All.

Few hours off 1 week. Feeling better and sleeping well.

Thanks to all for the kind words

Beav

Dee74

Congrats on the week

D