Day 1 again
 

This is so old and I’m so tried. I’ve been a heavy drinker for the last decade ( sounds so real saying this). I’ve embarrassed myself, family , and friends too many time to count. The drinking has evil spilled over to my professional life. Am a mess . I’ve completely let myself go . I’m fat and bloated. Hair is falling out. Skin looks like ****. Plainly I’m ugly as hell. I feel and look ugly. Somethings have to give . I’m simply functioning and not living. At 41 years of age I never thought this would be my life. I’m alone, bitter, and sad even though I wear a mask that everything is ok. It’s not.

I want to change. I have to.

Welcome Neak :)

SR helped me turn my life around - I know we can help you too - this is a great place to be :)

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Welcome to the family Neak! :) SR helped me get and stay sober for good. I know we can help you too. :hug:

I posted similar to yours about a month ago. You came to the right place, SR is on your side. The ability to make decisions that got your life to where it is now is the same ability to make choices to change it. Here with you. Welcome

Thank you all. Although this is my hundredth Day 1, this one feels a little different.

Welcome!

I read this or something similar a couple of threads ago “I'm not drinking now” and it is a great way to take this drinking thing on.

This go around, I don't think past now or today depending on whats rolling around in my head.

Just concentrate on “now” and see how that goes.

Also, don't allow yourself to talk/argue/debate with the addictive voice AV. If the AV shows up, kick that SOB to the curb.

Hi Neak, everyone has great points and welcome. Yes, focus on today only. All that other stuff you said will begin to resolve once you just don't drink. Don't get caught up in all the other stuff too or it will be overwhelming. Just don't drink today.

Hi Neak, welcome to the site. It sounds like you are ready for change. If you stop alcohol and start to look after yourself you will lose weight. I lost 10 kilos in 3 months, I had to stop for a medical situation I was in. Good to have you aboard and I wish you well on your journey. There is lots of support here.

Welcome Neak.

You’ll find much caring support here.

SR has made a great difference for me.

Stick with us. Post often. happyface:

Make this one different, make it the last ever day 1.

Log in as much as you can, multiple times a day if you can. Post before you drink. Express your feelings, fears and frustrations. Let us help you and we will.

I was so lost I didn't believe I would ever break the cycle, now I am now thankfully 1.5 years sober. You can be too.

You can do this!

Welcome to SR and as others have stated: things aren't lost yet.

You guys don’t know how much I needed this support. One thing that really stood out from each of
you
is concentrating on the “now”. I have to focus on TODAY. So may
time my focus would be long term goals and I always failed.

i not going to swing today.

it’s crazy how bad I look and feel , but that didn’t stop me. The making a fool out
of myself and becoming known as the “drunk” didn’t either, smh.... but I can’t keep going back to my past because I want to make this one count.

Today is all I have.

I thankful for you guys.

Day 2

Welcome to day 2 Neak. Read around and ask any questions you have. There is a lot of good and useful info here. I am on day 3 so we can do this together.

Welcoome Neak, I'm on Day 2

Lotta people here in the same situation. We can stay strong together. I'm making a promise to myself to post here when the craving hits, not after I give in. That never does any good...

Anywho, welcome back :c011:

Welcome Neak. I’m 41 as well ans I’ve been sober 1 year 5 months. Now I had that same exact inner monologue when I quit drinking. I still consider myself a newbie to sobriety. In this time, my bloated acne face is gone and clear. I didn’t lose Much weight the first year choosing to concentrate on sobriety so I did eat sugar, but I lost bloat and felt so much better. I also took long walks...exercise is your friend. The self loathing, anxiety and the what have I done with my life... thoughts have faded. You start to appreciate things so much differently and better. As they say it starts with one day at a time, don’t take the first drink. Then I made a one year goal..now it’s a five year go. If I’m struggling it might be the current hour goal, but the benefits do truly come. Now, as time went by I’ve added more exercise. It’s much easier to exercise and take long hikes when your not hungover. I sometimes think about when I hit 50...and what advantage it would be to have my body and mind free that long of the drink? It would be amazing. You can do it too.💪

Your OP touched me deeply. None of us deserve to live that way. I’ve seen many seemingly hopeless situations being turned around right here. It inspires and keeps me going. I look forward to following your progress. Please stay close and keep posting.

This disease is mind boggling. My hangover and guilt about Friday nights binge had me down and feeling so sick on yesterday. Guess what?! Today it crossed my mind to finish off the last of the vodka and start fresh on Monday. I didn’t do it, but can’t believe I had the thought.

i appreciate all of your replies more than you know.

Dump all that crap down the drain right now Neak. We don't drink anymore. Be rid of it.

Hi Neak

What worked for me was to use all available resources that would help me to get sober and stay sober.

For me, anything else would have been procrastinating.

Great job not drinking and I agree, dump it out.