MaximusD

Hi everyone, In my recent struggles, many of you have asked me what my recovery plan is. I am curious is anyone would like to elaborate or tell me what you mean. My recovery plan really is just to not drink. I have gotten a therapist now for a few months but not sure how much that is helping. I don't seem to have any traumas that I am aware of. My life is great when I don't drink. Great family and wife. Kind of at a loss as to what is up with all the relapses. What do you have in your recovery plan? I am coming up on 24 hours and am really going to need to make this a priority. I don't want to do this anymore and I don't want to look back on these posts after I DO lose everything and wish I would have gotten my stuff together. Thank you for any suggestions.

sortofhomecomin

This thread contains links to various recovery plans:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ssistance.html (Recovery plan - request for assistance?)


This was mine from 2018 (I have since made a few amends):

https://imgur.com/a/hX9WTf2

Of course a recovery plan no matter how well-designed is worth **** all if we chose to 'pick up' again.

sugarbear1

List some situations you might find yourself in and have a plan of escape or what you would do if it happened.

A friend asked you out to celebrate, there may be drinking, what do you do? etc.

Anna

Not drinking is the first step, but I think it's hard to remain sober and to recover unless you make some lifestyle changes.

I started walking a lot in the early evening, which was a tough time of the day for me, and I'm still walking as much as possible. I removed a few toxic people from my life, including a couple of family members. I read a lot of books on spirituality to try to re-connect with myself. I got back to hobbies that I had abandoned.

What do you think will work for you?

Lines

Have you worked with the therapist in identifying what's going on prior to a relapse? Could be feelings about self, worries that lead to stress, working too much and not getting enough self care in to balance your life. Or is it simply exposure to alcohol or cravings that hit you? Do you feel like it's a daily battle not to drink? Even after a while of sobriety?

I have to keep my life in balance. My issue was using cocaine to keep going, work more. I can have someone offer me some and simply say no without it being a big deal if I'm centered and all around taking care of myself with enough rest, play, family time. But if my thinking gets off and I have my priorities out of line, then I'm more susceptible to do a line of coke if its offered and work for another 12 hours, no sleep, and then working all day while my brain suffers the crash.

when I began using a whole back, what helped was talking to my therapist again. Have gone through CBT with him and that might be helpful for you if you've not tried it.

Anyway, if you want to call, it so. To stop this time. My plan was to tell my wife who is supportive, call my therapist, talk it out, begin taking better care of myself, and putting my life back in healthy balance. I also shared it with some family and friends who are close and whom I trust. That brought it full circle.

MaximusD

Thank you everyone. That all helped. The links above are good. I am going to talk to my therapist. While my wife doesn't know the extent of my drinking I did admit to her I was drinking and that was causing the problems. She knows I am an alcoholic for years now. I have done CBT stuff and am continuing to explore it. My problem is not standing up to the AV. I have always been the kind of person who is spontaneous and does whatever my brain comes up with. That has to stop and I have to grow up.

doggonecarl

You can call it spontaneous, but it's still a decision. A decision to drink after you've decided to quit. It's one thing to have sobriety as a goal. Another to have it as a commitment.

Sobriety requires the right thoughts and the right actions. Commit and stop changing your mind every time "the breeze blows funny." That's what my Grandmother called doing something spontaneously.

Lines

I think this is where motivation begins. There may be a spontaneous feeling, but if there is always regret afterward then those two things have to somehow be ,mentally connected. I spontaneously accepted some coke. I was using small amounts and no one knew. Nothing bad even happened, except I flipped out. 1. I dont want to feel like I need a drug like that. 2.. Its not worth the risk because years ago I did get really sick. 3. Its not how I want to cope with life. 4. It's not part of my value system because it does affect my thinking and actions in a negative way overall. 5. When my wife and I have kids, I dont want to set that kind of example. I dont ever want my kids to feel like they need something outside of their own self to be good enough, or fun enough. --- Time for me to grow up too.

Orchid1

Truer words were never spoken.

Nonsensical

Me too. It's called being impulsive. It didn't serve me very well, but I kept doing it because I thought it made me free. Free to choose.....whatever.....

I was wrong.
It made me a slave.
I can do anything I want.
Or I can drink.
But I damn sure can't do both.

Best of Luck on Your Journey!

Gottalife

This might be at the heart of the problem. Having lost the power of choice in drink, at certain times I was without an effective mental defense against the first drink. Dr Silkworth, an important early helper of AA stated that the main problem was in the mind. This was true for me anyway. Why was it, in the light of what always happened, that I ever repeated the insane experiment of the first drink? Thoughts that should have saved me did not come readily to mind. All defenses wee easily overcome by the mad idea that this time I could enjoy a few drinks, like I used to be able to do before I lost control. Most of my repeat experiments were started within hours of the last disaster without any thought or conscious decision. Often I did not even remember taking the fatal first drink. So the issue then, for me was to find an alternative and reliable defense.

The AA program suggests that once the power of choice has been lost, I might be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer. This idea came from celebrated psychologist Carl Jung, and it proved to be the answer for me and thousands of others. What that looks like is the problem is removed completely. No matter what has happened, it no longer occurs to me to drink. I lost the power of choice and never got it back. The whole idea of choice was made redundant instead. No fight, no decision required. Of course I did fight, almost to my last breath, to avoid the spiritual solution, but I was defeated just in time for my life to be saved.