What's the point
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,775
What's the point... of what? Staying sober? I got sober so I could like myself, no matter what anyone else thought of me. The point, to me, was to get myself healthy. And I found that people liked me more when I liked myself.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,428
Well first off, you have to do it for you.
Some of us burned a lot of bridges.
If I'd waited till people forgave me I might still be drinking.
You have to believe you're worth saving
It took me a lot of time and effort to get sober.
Not everyone appreciated or believed the changes in me - but most people did
Its more a marathon than a sprint, but most of us ran a decades long marathon with booze so it's not our first race
You have to focus on the positives a little.
Sober, alive, willing to change.
Check
D
Some of us burned a lot of bridges.
If I'd waited till people forgave me I might still be drinking.
You have to believe you're worth saving
It took me a lot of time and effort to get sober.
Not everyone appreciated or believed the changes in me - but most people did
Its more a marathon than a sprint, but most of us ran a decades long marathon with booze so it's not our first race
You have to focus on the positives a little.
Sober, alive, willing to change.
Check
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 67
As said above, the point isn’t what other people think - do you hate you? What if everyone worshipped the ground you walked on and you were the most popular person around? Would that make you feel better? Unlikely - you Would still feel the same. By getting and staying sober you will be loving yourself.
And at SR we don’t hate anyone! Apart from maybe Jack Daniels and his friend Jim Beam
And at SR we don’t hate anyone! Apart from maybe Jack Daniels and his friend Jim Beam
Coffee Snob
Thread Starter
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Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 808
Originally Posted by FlyAgain 
As said above, the point isn’t what other people think - do you hate you? What if everyone worshipped the ground you walked on and you were the most popular person around? Would that make you feel better? Unlikely - you Would still feel the same. By getting and staying sober you will be loving yourself.
And at SR we don’t hate anyone! Apart from maybe Jack Daniels and his friend Jim Beam
And at SR we don’t hate anyone! Apart from maybe Jack Daniels and his friend Jim Beam
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: St.Petersburg, FL.
Posts: 1,077
Hey, PuckLuck. I had to regain the trust and respect of people that I love and who I hurt, and that took time--I had to prove myself. I wanted to get sober--I knew there was a dignified, decent, fulfilling life without alcohol for me, and I worked hard for it--it was worth it too. You can have this, but you have to fight for it--and it is a battle, the hardest one I've fought.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,582
People don't like us because of our drinking. Can you blame them? I don't.
We are (mostly) liked again after we stop drinking. And if not, have it let it go.
My sister texted me the other day with only praise for "how I had turned my life around." It felt really good.
I'm liking myself again. I couldn't whilst I was drinking. I hated myself.. And others began to agree. But not anymore.
You are worth it.
We are (mostly) liked again after we stop drinking. And if not, have it let it go.
My sister texted me the other day with only praise for "how I had turned my life around." It felt really good.
I'm liking myself again. I couldn't whilst I was drinking. I hated myself.. And others began to agree. But not anymore.
You are worth it.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 743
I was so caught up in self that it almost killed me. Worried about me, what I would amount to, what people would think of ME.
The trick is so easy and so difficult at the same time. It's to get out of self. Who cares who likes me. In not trying to make enemies or anything but I try not to think of these things. It starts with gratitude for every little thing. A roof over my head, a device to post on SR. Food to eat. I'm not entitled to any of this stuff. I only have the things that I do have because of my creator, which I call God others may see as the Universe or whatever they believe in. Something put us in this World, somehow. I'm here to try and serve this creator the best I can. Try and make this World a better place, love people and animals. When I'm thinking about how I can help others. When I'm appreciating all the seemingly stupid little things I have from a spring day to a nice meal. Then I forget to think of myself and all that fear that used to drive me to drink.
The further I get from a drink the easier this gets.. Alcohol's real purpose is a depressant. It makes us depressed it just takes a while for it's real purpose to kick in. The buzz comes first but the real effect is that misery we feel in the following days. We should replace the term drink with anxiety and depression when we think of it. Instead of I need a drink, I need anxiety and depression. Not let's go to the bar for a drink, let's go to the bar for some anxiety and depression.
The trick is so easy and so difficult at the same time. It's to get out of self. Who cares who likes me. In not trying to make enemies or anything but I try not to think of these things. It starts with gratitude for every little thing. A roof over my head, a device to post on SR. Food to eat. I'm not entitled to any of this stuff. I only have the things that I do have because of my creator, which I call God others may see as the Universe or whatever they believe in. Something put us in this World, somehow. I'm here to try and serve this creator the best I can. Try and make this World a better place, love people and animals. When I'm thinking about how I can help others. When I'm appreciating all the seemingly stupid little things I have from a spring day to a nice meal. Then I forget to think of myself and all that fear that used to drive me to drink.
The further I get from a drink the easier this gets.. Alcohol's real purpose is a depressant. It makes us depressed it just takes a while for it's real purpose to kick in. The buzz comes first but the real effect is that misery we feel in the following days. We should replace the term drink with anxiety and depression when we think of it. Instead of I need a drink, I need anxiety and depression. Not let's go to the bar for a drink, let's go to the bar for some anxiety and depression.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
Originally Posted by PuckLuck
...when everyone hates you?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 280
I can relate. I have spent a lot of time trying to please others or trying to be liked.
One of the benefits of sobriety is the perspective it brings. Relationships and priorities become so clear you will be able to analyse where you have wasted time, and where attention is needed.
Just stop. The benefits will manifest themselves in time. I know. Easier said than done. But it’s the only way.
Wishing you a clear June!
One of the benefits of sobriety is the perspective it brings. Relationships and priorities become so clear you will be able to analyse where you have wasted time, and where attention is needed.
Just stop. The benefits will manifest themselves in time. I know. Easier said than done. But it’s the only way.
Wishing you a clear June!
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