Dee74

There's not much point in carrying resentments PM. Your energy is best spent on getting sober and staying that way.
You can sort out the family stuff later.

Did you end up going to the hospital?

D

PeaceManic

No I didnt. My sister was going to take me but she refused me getting my stuff together.

I would of had to go last night through lack of funds, but secured funds. I'm still very ill, my lips are numb. I'm still kind of glad im not there. I will do my best to weane off.

Dee74

If we're waiting for others to take care of us, some of us (like me) find/found we may be waiting a long time.

Rightly or wrongly I alienated those closest to me over my decades long drinking career - but I didn't let that get in the way of getting better.

I really recommend you don't let it get in your way either PM.

Start thinking now about what actions you can take to get and stay in recovery.

D

PeaceManic

So ive got to worry about a social welfare check i think they call it now. I forget they pulled that on me twice, my own inebriated niavery I guess. Plus they called me aterrorist and a sex offender. Hopefully needless to, well not to my family, the height of my criminal career is a caution for drunk and disorderly when i passed in the street.

Now i probably got to worry about them sending me to jail for some stupid thing I said while drunk. They said they were recording it. Doesnt end

Dee74

It will end when you stop drinking PM - when you're sober you;ll become a much better advocate for your self and your well being.
Welfare checks are not instruments of punishment anyway - people are obviously worried about you.

have you managed a day one yet?

D

PeaceManic

No I started on the 11 which was my birthday. I texted my sister ironically saying please dont report me being a terrorist. Sad now im scared ive put the idea in her head

Dee74

You need to stop drinking PM.
You're not making a lot of sense here.

Its only going to get worse the more you drink.

D

Hawkeye13

No, the goal of life is not to manipulate things, especially people, in your favor. It is to take responsibility for yourself. I took a great deal of advantage of my family’s good will, time, and emotional energy to keep my drinking going for years. They finally said enough. That was the beginning of real recovery for me, because I had to suffer my own consequences. This could be an opportunity for you to really start the process of recovery on your own and let go of this vampire addiction.

What small decisions can you make right now to take back your life and to not expect rescue? It feels really empowering to take positive action on your own behalf.

PeaceManic

I find very it hard I was considering reporting theft of my car to police. but i wont do it. I'll let it all go

PeaceManic

Loads of shops here and iwant to get fit, plus thing was almost as thirsty as me, 30 quid every time i want to go further than five miles

PeaceManic

ive constantl rung for last few days which hasn't helped, but as ive constantly said im close to literal death. I'll try to take resonsibility for myself, but I'm serious I will never talk to any of them again, never take my mentally ill brother anywhere. Good bye ten years of looking after my neice nephew, and 12 plus months of caring for my dying mother when no sibling wanted to knw

ReadyAtLast

I know when I stop drinking I see things more clearly and can work on mending relationships and myself. But the first thing is to stop drinking. I hope you can start day 1 today. apologies if you already have.

BeABetterMan

PM, it's perfectly fine to feel that way today. Maybe you will always feel that way, but probably not. But although that seems like the biggest thing in your world right now, the truth is sobriety should be your priority. What are you doing about getting sober?

PeaceManic

Sobriety? I'm trying to stay alive in the immediate, they don't always go together.
i've five bottles of wine to keep alivr for hours, i guess im alright now

least

I hope you can stop drinking before something really awful happens.

Dee74

Drinking to stay alive is pretty much a crap shoot PM.
The punters always lose.

Like least I really hope you stop before something really bad happens to you.

D