2 week program ain't working.
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Originally Posted by Dee74 
sometimes, if they can't find the words, people have printed out their threads to take to their doctor?
D
D
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It's definitely possible to get sober while continuing to work and not going to rehab. It won't be easy, it never is. But, you can do it. I didn't go to rehab. I think it depends a lot on your motivation. I relied on books, as I often have in my life. After a few years, I found SR, and I've been here ever since.
Dee's suggestion about online meetings is a good one. Maybe that would work for you and give you some inspiration?
Dee's suggestion about online meetings is a good one. Maybe that would work for you and give you some inspiration?
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Originally Posted by Anna
It's definitely possible to get sober while continuing to work and not going to rehab. It won't be easy, it never is. But, you can do it. I didn't go to rehab. I think it depends a lot on your motivation. I relied on books, as I often have in my life. After a few years, I found SR, and I've been here ever since.
Dee's suggestion about online meetings is a good one. Maybe that would work for you and give you some inspiration?
Dee's suggestion about online meetings is a good one. Maybe that would work for you and give you some inspiration?
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We have a great book list compiled from our members' suggestions:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ependence.html (Books on Recovery, Spirituality & Codependence)
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ependence.html (Books on Recovery, Spirituality & Codependence)
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Join Date: Feb 2020
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Quitting while working. Tough for me too. I was trying to quit cocaine while working prior to the covid shutdown. The depressive feelings, lack of mental clarity is what I was challenged with. I think I could have done it, but luckily Covid lockdown gave me time off work instead.
When I told my wife, first thing she did was ask if I'd contacted my doctor. I had been through treatment like 7 years ago, but generally continued to see my doctor who specializes once a year to keep connected. So I called him and started therapy via online sessions. I did have to go in for some bloodwork, and a quick exam. Online therapy sessions worked well for me. I found this site when still using, and keep coming back to read.
sorry about your wife. Its hard on family. My wife is calm and supportive but she didnt even know I was using. Early on I overheard her crying a few times. Mostly it was fear I think because I had a bad binge those years ago, and it's been hard for both of us not to remember some very bad stuff. I think family needs to know you have a plan to quit and get healthy. I told my parents after a couple months and shared about therapy and what I'd learned about why I started using again. With all that, they handled it well. I'm sure your wife would respond well to a plan and action.
I'd start by contacting the doctor who does the Rx. The doc will have seen it before. And remember, the drugs affect our thinking, all those lovely brain chemicals and such. I wouldn't say your weak, but rather stuck in a vicious cycle.
When I told my wife, first thing she did was ask if I'd contacted my doctor. I had been through treatment like 7 years ago, but generally continued to see my doctor who specializes once a year to keep connected. So I called him and started therapy via online sessions. I did have to go in for some bloodwork, and a quick exam. Online therapy sessions worked well for me. I found this site when still using, and keep coming back to read.
sorry about your wife. Its hard on family. My wife is calm and supportive but she didnt even know I was using. Early on I overheard her crying a few times. Mostly it was fear I think because I had a bad binge those years ago, and it's been hard for both of us not to remember some very bad stuff. I think family needs to know you have a plan to quit and get healthy. I told my parents after a couple months and shared about therapy and what I'd learned about why I started using again. With all that, they handled it well. I'm sure your wife would respond well to a plan and action.
I'd start by contacting the doctor who does the Rx. The doc will have seen it before. And remember, the drugs affect our thinking, all those lovely brain chemicals and such. I wouldn't say your weak, but rather stuck in a vicious cycle.
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I go to online meetings everyday and I love them. In fact, they are easier to attend than going in person.
As far as telling the doc, it's easy. Just tell him. He's heard it before. He'll be really supportive and help you plan how to wean off.
There is nothing about this that is new to a physician. And I hate to be cold, but my last sponsor was awesome and taught me some great lessons. He spoke in hard truths. Basically, you need to understand you can't keep your marriage/child and your pills. You can't. That ship has sailed. Pick a side.
As far as the job goes, you can ask for FMLA and go to treatment if you think you need it. Many people get sober without rehab though. It can be done.
Are you using today?
As far as telling the doc, it's easy. Just tell him. He's heard it before. He'll be really supportive and help you plan how to wean off.
There is nothing about this that is new to a physician. And I hate to be cold, but my last sponsor was awesome and taught me some great lessons. He spoke in hard truths. Basically, you need to understand you can't keep your marriage/child and your pills. You can't. That ship has sailed. Pick a side.
As far as the job goes, you can ask for FMLA and go to treatment if you think you need it. Many people get sober without rehab though. It can be done.
Are you using today?
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Originally Posted by BeABetterMan
I go to online meetings everyday and I love them. In fact, they are easier to attend than going in person.
As far as telling the doc, it's easy. Just tell him. He's heard it before. He'll be really supportive and help you plan how to wean off.
There is nothing about this that is new to a physician. And I hate to be cold, but my last sponsor was awesome and taught me some great lessons. He spoke in hard truths. Basically, you need to understand you can't keep your marriage/child and your pills. You can't. That ship has sailed. Pick a side.
As far as the job goes, you can ask for FMLA and go to treatment if you think you need it. Many people get sober without rehab though. It can be done.
Are you using today?
As far as telling the doc, it's easy. Just tell him. He's heard it before. He'll be really supportive and help you plan how to wean off.
There is nothing about this that is new to a physician. And I hate to be cold, but my last sponsor was awesome and taught me some great lessons. He spoke in hard truths. Basically, you need to understand you can't keep your marriage/child and your pills. You can't. That ship has sailed. Pick a side.
As far as the job goes, you can ask for FMLA and go to treatment if you think you need it. Many people get sober without rehab though. It can be done.
Are you using today?
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Arizona, USA
Posts: 1,598
It's not uncommon for me to go through all of my sick days in the first two months of the year so I feel your pain there.
A lot of these issues you're kicking around in your head are solved by going to the doctor. First, you can discuss how to get off of the pills medically, secondly the doctor can write you a letter to bring to your HR department to get you on FMLA and even Short Term Disability if you think you would like to try treatment. No one will know why you're out, in fact that's the law. I've actually taken two 6 week breaks from work for recovery.
I'm not accusing you of this, but you have to be mindful of excuses. I hear a lot of concern in your posts, but other than quitting for two days, I don't hear any actual action. Time to get busy or we'll be reading another, "I can't seem to quit the pills" or "I need to make this stick" posts in a week or two. You will want to take some action every day to start moving towards a new life. Sometimes we don't know what action to take, so here's some advice. If I were you and could do one single thing today to set my recovery in motion, I would make an appointment with your doctor.
A lot of these issues you're kicking around in your head are solved by going to the doctor. First, you can discuss how to get off of the pills medically, secondly the doctor can write you a letter to bring to your HR department to get you on FMLA and even Short Term Disability if you think you would like to try treatment. No one will know why you're out, in fact that's the law. I've actually taken two 6 week breaks from work for recovery.
I'm not accusing you of this, but you have to be mindful of excuses. I hear a lot of concern in your posts, but other than quitting for two days, I don't hear any actual action. Time to get busy or we'll be reading another, "I can't seem to quit the pills" or "I need to make this stick" posts in a week or two. You will want to take some action every day to start moving towards a new life. Sometimes we don't know what action to take, so here's some advice. If I were you and could do one single thing today to set my recovery in motion, I would make an appointment with your doctor.
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Originally Posted by Lines
Quitting while working. Tough for me too. I was trying to quit cocaine while working prior to the covid shutdown. The depressive feelings, lack of mental clarity is what I was challenged with. I think I could have done it, but luckily Covid lockdown gave me time off work instead.
When I told my wife, first thing she did was ask if I'd contacted my doctor. I had been through treatment like 7 years ago, but generally continued to see my doctor who specializes once a year to keep connected. So I called him and started therapy via online sessions. I did have to go in for some bloodwork, and a quick exam. Online therapy sessions worked well for me. I found this site when still using, and keep coming back to read.
sorry about your wife. Its hard on family. My wife is calm and supportive but she didnt even know I was using. Early on I overheard her crying a few times. Mostly it was fear I think because I had a bad binge those years ago, and it's been hard for both of us not to remember some very bad stuff. I think family needs to know you have a plan to quit and get healthy. I told my parents after a couple months and shared about therapy and what I'd learned about why I started using again. With all that, they handled it well. I'm sure your wife would respond well to a plan and action.
I'd start by contacting the doctor who does the Rx. The doc will have seen it before. And remember, the drugs affect our thinking, all those lovely brain chemicals and such. I wouldn't say your weak, but rather stuck in a vicious cycle.
When I told my wife, first thing she did was ask if I'd contacted my doctor. I had been through treatment like 7 years ago, but generally continued to see my doctor who specializes once a year to keep connected. So I called him and started therapy via online sessions. I did have to go in for some bloodwork, and a quick exam. Online therapy sessions worked well for me. I found this site when still using, and keep coming back to read.
sorry about your wife. Its hard on family. My wife is calm and supportive but she didnt even know I was using. Early on I overheard her crying a few times. Mostly it was fear I think because I had a bad binge those years ago, and it's been hard for both of us not to remember some very bad stuff. I think family needs to know you have a plan to quit and get healthy. I told my parents after a couple months and shared about therapy and what I'd learned about why I started using again. With all that, they handled it well. I'm sure your wife would respond well to a plan and action.
I'd start by contacting the doctor who does the Rx. The doc will have seen it before. And remember, the drugs affect our thinking, all those lovely brain chemicals and such. I wouldn't say your weak, but rather stuck in a vicious cycle.
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Join Date: Apr 2020
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Originally Posted by BeABetterMan
It's not uncommon for me to go through all of my sick days in the first two months of the year so I feel your pain there.
A lot of these issues you're kicking around in your head are solved by going to the doctor. First, you can discuss how to get off of the pills medically, secondly the doctor can write you a letter to bring to your HR department to get you on FMLA and even Short Term Disability if you think you would like to try treatment. No one will know why you're out, in fact that's the law. I've actually taken two 6 week breaks from work for recovery.
I'm not accusing you of this, but you have to be mindful of excuses. I hear a lot of concern in your posts, but other than quitting for two days, I don't hear any actual action. Time to get busy or we'll be reading another, "I can't seem to quit the pills" or "I need to make this stick" posts in a week or two. You will want to take some action every day to start moving towards a new life. Sometimes we don't know what action to take, so here's some advice. If I were you and could do one single thing today to set my recovery in motion, I would make an appointment with your doctor.
A lot of these issues you're kicking around in your head are solved by going to the doctor. First, you can discuss how to get off of the pills medically, secondly the doctor can write you a letter to bring to your HR department to get you on FMLA and even Short Term Disability if you think you would like to try treatment. No one will know why you're out, in fact that's the law. I've actually taken two 6 week breaks from work for recovery.
I'm not accusing you of this, but you have to be mindful of excuses. I hear a lot of concern in your posts, but other than quitting for two days, I don't hear any actual action. Time to get busy or we'll be reading another, "I can't seem to quit the pills" or "I need to make this stick" posts in a week or two. You will want to take some action every day to start moving towards a new life. Sometimes we don't know what action to take, so here's some advice. If I were you and could do one single thing today to set my recovery in motion, I would make an appointment with your doctor.
I was given FMLA for anxiety earlier in the year. It took almost a month it first gets filled by a doctor then goes to a FMLA department that goes to see if approved. It was only good for 1 day a week, at that time I was talking to a physician weekly then she left to another state. I felt like I was getting better then covid19 hit , then things changed. Wife got laid off from work, I will pick myself up and get started on my recovery.
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Originally Posted by BeABetterMan
It's not uncommon for me to go through all of my sick days in the first two months of the year so I feel your pain there.
A lot of these issues you're kicking around in your head are solved by going to the doctor. First, you can discuss how to get off of the pills medically, secondly the doctor can write you a letter to bring to your HR department to get you on FMLA and even Short Term Disability if you think you would like to try treatment. No one will know why you're out, in fact that's the law. I've actually taken two 6 week breaks from work for recovery.
I'm not accusing you of this, but you have to be mindful of excuses. I hear a lot of concern in your posts, but other than quitting for two days, I don't hear any actual action. Time to get busy or we'll be reading another, "I can't seem to quit the pills" or "I need to make this stick" posts in a week or two. You will want to take some action every day to start moving towards a new life. Sometimes we don't know what action to take, so here's some advice. If I were you and could do one single thing today to set my recovery in motion, I would make an appointment with your doctor.
A lot of these issues you're kicking around in your head are solved by going to the doctor. First, you can discuss how to get off of the pills medically, secondly the doctor can write you a letter to bring to your HR department to get you on FMLA and even Short Term Disability if you think you would like to try treatment. No one will know why you're out, in fact that's the law. I've actually taken two 6 week breaks from work for recovery.
I'm not accusing you of this, but you have to be mindful of excuses. I hear a lot of concern in your posts, but other than quitting for two days, I don't hear any actual action. Time to get busy or we'll be reading another, "I can't seem to quit the pills" or "I need to make this stick" posts in a week or two. You will want to take some action every day to start moving towards a new life. Sometimes we don't know what action to take, so here's some advice. If I were you and could do one single thing today to set my recovery in motion, I would make an appointment with your doctor.
I went ahead and sent a message to my doctor regarding my addiction to pills. I went ahead and asked for FMLA time to get some help from the substance abuse outpatient program. I hope and pray that they approve my leave. But for now it's the biggest step towards recovery I've done in years telling the doctor I've become addicted to pain medicine. It was so hard I kept writing over and over again, I kept looking at my kids and my wife saying I pick you over this addiction. I looked back at my life decisions and was like every time I wanted Ed something in life I went for it. Knowing if I tried and showed up I have a chance of accomplishment. But just dwelling on what I want to do with no action gets you nothing but maybes and in the same cycle. Thanks everyone I know it's just the first step but you all helped me really think of stuff that was uncomfortable and needed to be honest with myself.
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Originally Posted by stickyone
I went ahead and sent a message to my doctor regarding my addiction to pills. I went ahead and asked for FMLA time to get some help from the substance abuse outpatient program. I hope and pray that they approve my leave. But for now it's the biggest step towards recovery I've done in years telling the doctor I've become addicted to pain medicine. It was so hard I kept writing over and over again, I kept looking at my kids and my wife saying I pick you over this addiction. I looked back at my life decisions and was like every time I wanted Ed something in life I went for it. Knowing if I tried and showed up I have a chance of accomplishment. But just dwelling on what I want to do with no action gets you nothing but maybes and in the same cycle. Thanks everyone I know it's just the first step but you all helped me really think of stuff that was uncomfortable and needed to be honest with myself.
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Originally Posted by BeABetterMan
<br><br>I am SO FREAKING PROUD OF YOU. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. You just took a huge first step. A first two steps!<br><br>Now one more thing, and I speak from experience, give your wife space. Don't pursue, don't look for credit even though these steps you've taken are HUGE. You are going to walk this recover path mostly separate from your wife. We can definitely talk more about that whenever, but you've done a lot of damage and you've probably said you're gonna quit before. She likely has her defenses up. She's likely scared, she probably wants to trust but can't. All of that is fixed in time. <br><br>Also, remember to be kind to yourself. You didn't choose to become addicted. It says nothing of you as a person. Addicts are some of the most kind and empathetic people the world has. I heard a guy say the other day, "God loves me so much he made me an addict". And he meant it. You are about to embark on a journey that will improve everything in your life. It is going to be HARD. But you'll take it "one bite at a time".
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Excellent decision ! I understand how hard it is. I put off telling my wife because when I did it would then feel real. I wanted to stop on my own and tell her later. But the truth is I also knew telling her would take a huge burden off me. Exact same feelings telling my doctor. Its scary, emotional, brought up some negative feelings in me like I had failed on my own. But what I realized later is that the sooner I stopped the better, and I needed help to make it go as smoothly as possible. I would really ask your doc about some therapy. CBT is what I learned in treatment years ago and I got a refresher this year. Also, managing stress, focusing on health, identifying my goals, what's important to me in life. It helps to have someone to voice all this and know I'm getting back on the right track. There are a lot of tools in therapy like meditation,, and help in building incentives and motivation. Also, if you go to church, or have religious beliefs it helps to fall back on your values, and the comfort this brings.
sounds like you have a beautiful family. Fight to be a good role model, and a good partner. The rewards will come!
sounds like you have a beautiful family. Fight to be a good role model, and a good partner. The rewards will come!
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Originally Posted by Lines
Excellent decision ! I understand how hard it is. I put off telling my wife because when I did it would then feel real. I wanted to stop on my own and tell her later. But the truth is I also knew telling her would take a huge burden off me. Exact same feelings telling my doctor. Its scary, emotional, brought up some negative feelings in me like I had failed on my own. But what I realized later is that the sooner I stopped the better, and I needed help to make it go as smoothly as possible. I would really ask your doc about some therapy. CBT is what I learned in treatment years ago and I got a refresher this year. Also, managing stress, focusing on health, identifying my goals, what's important to me in life. It helps to have someone to voice all this and know I'm getting back on the right track. There are a lot of tools in therapy like meditation,, and help in building incentives and motivation. Also, if you go to church, or have religious beliefs it helps to fall back on your values, and the comfort this brings.
sounds like you have a beautiful family. Fight to be a good role model, and a good partner. The rewards will come!
sounds like you have a beautiful family. Fight to be a good role model, and a good partner. The rewards will come!
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Today is day 3 , it was a rough night had the nightmares along side the physical withdrawal and anxiety. Im supposed to get a follow up call from my doctor regarding treatment. I just feel horrible I called in sick for the rest of the week. I just didn't want people to see me like I am, I feel like it's wrong and maybe I should push through and go to work. I just don't want to have a outburst at someone because of my irritated well being. So much going through my head at the moment.
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Not good I'm am struggling here guys. Spoke to my doctor and he said he would write me a prescription to taper down with seeing how long I've been on meds. As far as FMLA I need to contact the substance abuse and mental health department for a evaluation. Which I know takes more than a months time. Doctor said this is the last time he will be prescribing pain meds, which is a step in the right direction. But WOW, I am lost
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Originally Posted by stickyone
Not good I'm am struggling here guys. Spoke to my doctor and he said he would write me a prescription to taper down with seeing how long I've been on meds. As far as FMLA I need to contact the substance abuse and mental health department for a evaluation. Which I know takes more than a months time. Doctor said this is the last time he will be prescribing pain meds, which is a step in the right direction. But WOW, I am lost
As far as work goes, you're talking to a guy that has sluffed off work probably more than any other human still employed. What I did find though, during recovery is that i actually feel a lot better at the end of the day if I did go to work because otherwise I struggle with guilt and shame. If you've decided you're not going in then accept that decision and move on. No need to toss it around in your head. If you can't make it in, but the result is that you get sober and can be a better employee in the future, this will all be forgotten. We can't hide the impacts of our addiction from the world. Work suffers, family suffers, thems is the facts. But remember, all of this discomfort and fear and shame and guilt is why we're getting sober.
Deal with what you can deal with today. Remember you don't control hardly anything (which despite what we think is actually a good thing). And none of us can say how everything can turn out for you, but what I can say with 100% confidence is that it will turn out better if you don't swallow a bunch of pills to avoid having to face life.
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