First time here
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
It is really great you have already identified a powerful trigger like food. You will not have to live with it. Take the opportunity to really look at your diet and eating patterns and make some changes. All of us could eat healthier and maybe for the next few weeks you change it up a bit.
Also I want to suggest that it might not be food itself, but rather a time of day that might be the trigger? The purveyors of Happy Hour have always known exactly what they are going in that regard.
Either way you can examine those things to your benefit. If it is a time of day, you can get your arms around that, keep that time of day scheduled every minute, and that time of day will start to shrink and then go away.
Don't worry about not sleeping so good at first. It is nearly universal. Don't fight it and it will get better. Tired yet clear-headed is so better than waking up the other way.
Also I want to suggest that it might not be food itself, but rather a time of day that might be the trigger? The purveyors of Happy Hour have always known exactly what they are going in that regard.
Either way you can examine those things to your benefit. If it is a time of day, you can get your arms around that, keep that time of day scheduled every minute, and that time of day will start to shrink and then go away.
Don't worry about not sleeping so good at first. It is nearly universal. Don't fight it and it will get better. Tired yet clear-headed is so better than waking up the other way.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 519
You are in the right place! I am so so happy you are here.
Take things in bite sized pieces right now, you've got a lot to unpack but the great news is that you can do this.
In my first 9 months of recovery, which is where I am at currently, I left a career (in wine), got divorced, moved out, and admitted powerlessness over alcohol. This forum has been here for me every step of the way, but I also decided I needed to try a program of recovery so I chose AA. This is of course not the only option, but I found an AMAZING group of friends, people I now call my family, and a support system that are there for me in every way. I talk to so many people a day and have joined in on the hundreds of ZOOM meetings. There are incredible resources out there for you right now at the touch of your fingers.
If you are interested in any of the meetings, I would be more than happy to share them! Just message me and I'll shoot the links!
You have taken a really important step in the right direction, and while I cannot speak on your relationship, I do now this; that once you eliminate alcohol and start to really do the hard but gratifying and special work on yourself, all that is not for you will leave you and all that is yours will begin making its way towards you. That is a promise.
I am rooting for you!
Nic.
Take things in bite sized pieces right now, you've got a lot to unpack but the great news is that you can do this.
In my first 9 months of recovery, which is where I am at currently, I left a career (in wine), got divorced, moved out, and admitted powerlessness over alcohol. This forum has been here for me every step of the way, but I also decided I needed to try a program of recovery so I chose AA. This is of course not the only option, but I found an AMAZING group of friends, people I now call my family, and a support system that are there for me in every way. I talk to so many people a day and have joined in on the hundreds of ZOOM meetings. There are incredible resources out there for you right now at the touch of your fingers.
If you are interested in any of the meetings, I would be more than happy to share them! Just message me and I'll shoot the links!
You have taken a really important step in the right direction, and while I cannot speak on your relationship, I do now this; that once you eliminate alcohol and start to really do the hard but gratifying and special work on yourself, all that is not for you will leave you and all that is yours will begin making its way towards you. That is a promise.
I am rooting for you!
Nic.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 286
Originally Posted by NicLin 
You are in the right place! I am so so happy you are here.
Take things in bite sized pieces right now, you've got a lot to unpack but the great news is that you can do this.
In my first 9 months of recovery, which is where I am at currently, I left a career (in wine), got divorced, moved out, and admitted powerlessness over alcohol. This forum has been here for me every step of the way, but I also decided I needed to try a program of recovery so I chose AA. This is of course not the only option, but I found an AMAZING group of friends, people I now call my family, and a support system that are there for me in every way. I talk to so many people a day and have joined in on the hundreds of ZOOM meetings. There are incredible resources out there for you right now at the touch of your fingers.
If you are interested in any of the meetings, I would be more than happy to share them! Just message me and I'll shoot the links!
You have taken a really important step in the right direction, and while I cannot speak on your relationship, I do now this; that once you eliminate alcohol and start to really do the hard but gratifying and special work on yourself, all that is not for you will leave you and all that is yours will begin making its way towards you. That is a promise.
I am rooting for you!
Nic.
Take things in bite sized pieces right now, you've got a lot to unpack but the great news is that you can do this.
In my first 9 months of recovery, which is where I am at currently, I left a career (in wine), got divorced, moved out, and admitted powerlessness over alcohol. This forum has been here for me every step of the way, but I also decided I needed to try a program of recovery so I chose AA. This is of course not the only option, but I found an AMAZING group of friends, people I now call my family, and a support system that are there for me in every way. I talk to so many people a day and have joined in on the hundreds of ZOOM meetings. There are incredible resources out there for you right now at the touch of your fingers.
If you are interested in any of the meetings, I would be more than happy to share them! Just message me and I'll shoot the links!
You have taken a really important step in the right direction, and while I cannot speak on your relationship, I do now this; that once you eliminate alcohol and start to really do the hard but gratifying and special work on yourself, all that is not for you will leave you and all that is yours will begin making its way towards you. That is a promise.
I am rooting for you!
Nic.
under new management
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 2,339
I just caught up on your thread, Orchid. Stick close to SoberRecovery, there will always be someone to respond to your posts.
This is the best place you never wanted to be
rose
This is the best place you never wanted to be
rose
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Orchid1, I remember those early struggles and wish you well. This is a good place to start. There will be learning ahead, and some actual commitments to make, and some surprises. At this point I would suggest you consider committing to abstinence forever. It sounds like a big step, but it's actually the easier step, and the one that actually works. Keeping the door open for that eventual emergency or special occasion that deserves a drink is something you should be willing to let go. It's not as hard as it sounds. For me not drinking turned out be be... well, wonderful.
What you are going through right now like carrying a bottle of wine to check out and then putting it back, won't always be a thing. You will learn to be comfortable in a more risk free environment. Where you are right now was the hard part for me, the part where you struggle with cravings before you embrace full recovery. This part doesn't last forever. For me it passed quickly, like in about one week. Then there were manageable cravings for awhile, and then those disappeared.
There will always be people here who will help you meet the challenges ahead. Believe me, we know what it's like.
What you are going through right now like carrying a bottle of wine to check out and then putting it back, won't always be a thing. You will learn to be comfortable in a more risk free environment. Where you are right now was the hard part for me, the part where you struggle with cravings before you embrace full recovery. This part doesn't last forever. For me it passed quickly, like in about one week. Then there were manageable cravings for awhile, and then those disappeared.
There will always be people here who will help you meet the challenges ahead. Believe me, we know what it's like.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
In the future I bet you look at the 2 times you resisted temptation as being a turning point for you. I suggest you get some juice or soda in the fridge for when you want to drink. I found just holding the glass and relaxing was a pretty good substitute. It didn't have to be alcoholic.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Originally Posted by Orchid1
Don't know how to get over the food association though, do the cravings just go away when the habit is no longer associated with something? Or is this a thing I will just have to live with?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 286
Originally Posted by FeelingGreat
In the future I bet you look at the 2 times you resisted temptation as being a turning point for you. I suggest you get some juice or soda in the fridge for when you want to drink. I found just holding the glass and relaxing was a pretty good substitute. It didn't have to be alcoholic.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 286
DriGuy, thank you for your words, its true I have found my head thinking about if I will open myself to drink again when I can just have one glass and be done, but that has never been the case so why would it be in the future. I am becoming painfully aware of how much discipline I lack.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 286
Into day 7
I just read my first post on here and goodness how much can change in a week! I will say were my mind was feels like about 100 degrees not quite 180 from where I was. I realized I was just as much a problem in my relationship as my boyfriend, that being sober I could see he is just a ball of anxiety with no real way of dealing with it and now what I feel is empathy. I cant tell him to stop with the drugs(Lord knows it never worked on me) I can only be an example of what dealing life's stresses looks like with a sober mind. I have so many character improvements to do but I am excited for being that better person. On day 3 I went and bought some wine(those carrier ones with the four bottles), didn't want to drink it as I bought it and honestly I think it was just habit. I don't know if this happened to anyone else but my sense of smell if becoming very good, I opened one on day 4 and the smell was just terrible to me! Honestly could not believe I drank so much of this sometimes on an empty stomach! I swear the body is a resilient thing! I did this though out the day and still it was bad. Day 5 when I was done with dinner I got it out again, did the same thing and it still smelled terrible, it gave me the feeling turpentine does. Day 6, I bought just one bottle of a different kind, smelled it, it smelled better but still, it did not seem worth it. I don't know what it is but having it that close and choosing not to drink makes me feel stronger about it. Now when the craving hits I have been going out for a drive or eating a fruit or something sweet(Someone here suggested I drink soda when it hits and I declined cause I don't like sweet stuff 😄, I WAS WRONG!), and I come on SR when it is particularly strong or really alot of the time since I started, this place is a God send! I will get rid of the wine either give it to a friend or just pitch it at some point. Earlier today I read on another thread something like 'non-alcoholics dont spend their days thinking about not drinking', that! That was a huge dose of realty, I think I was still toying with the idea of being an occasional(not even social) drinker down the line when I can have just one, but that is not real. I just called the thing turpentine and I was still thinking yeah...it'l be fine. My thinking is so distorted. I turn 30 this year, I would love to celebrate it still sober but honestly who know, I want to have a drink right now...one day at a time.
It is great that my food is being properly digested and absorbed now, my body still feels off especially with the extra 40lbs of booze I'm carrying but my skin feels MUCH better!
It is great that my food is being properly digested and absorbed now, my body still feels off especially with the extra 40lbs of booze I'm carrying but my skin feels MUCH better!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 1,543
Originally Posted by Orchid1
I just read my first post on here and goodness how much can change in a week! I will say were my mind was feels like about 100 degrees not quite 180 from where I was. I realized I was just as much a problem in my relationship as my boyfriend, that being sober I could see he is just a ball of anxiety with no real way of dealing with it and now what I feel is empathy. I cant tell him to stop with the drugs(Lord knows it never worked on me) I can only be an example of what dealing life's stresses looks like with a sober mind. I have so many character improvements to do but I am excited for being that better person. On day 3 I went and bought some wine(those carrier ones with the four bottles), didn't want to drink it as I bought it and honestly I think it was just habit. I don't know if this happened to anyone else but my sense of smell if becoming very good, I opened one on day 4 and the smell was just terrible to me! Honestly could not believe I drank so much of this sometimes on an empty stomach! I swear the body is a resilient thing! I did this though out the day and still it was bad. Day 5 when I was done with dinner I got it out again, did the same thing and it still smelled terrible, it gave me the feeling turpentine does. Day 6, I bought just one bottle of a different kind, smelled it, it smelled better but still, it did not seem worth it. I don't know what it is but having it that close and choosing not to drink makes me feel stronger about it. Now when the craving hits I have been going out for a drive or eating a fruit or something sweet(Someone here suggested I drink soda when it hits and I declined cause I don't like sweet stuff ��, I WAS WRONG!), and I come on SR when it is particularly strong or really alot of the time since I started, this place is a God send! I will get rid of the wine either give it to a friend or just pitch it at some point. Earlier today I read on another thread something like 'non-alcoholics dont spend their days thinking about not drinking', that! That was a huge dose of realty, I think I was still toying with the idea of being an occasional(not even social) drinker down the line when I can have just one, but that is not real. I just called the thing turpentine and I was still thinking yeah...it'l be fine. My thinking is so distorted. I turn 30 this year, I would love to celebrate it still sober but honestly who know, I want to have a drink right now...one day at a time.
It is great that my food is being properly digested and absorbed now, my body still feels off especially with the extra 40lbs of booze I'm carrying but my skin feels MUCH better!
It is great that my food is being properly digested and absorbed now, my body still feels off especially with the extra 40lbs of booze I'm carrying but my skin feels MUCH better!
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