One Month Sober
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Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 4,788
One Month Sober
This past month whenever I felt like I should be doing something or other, I told myself "just try and get to a month sober, then you can start fixing your life."
Well, a month sober has come.
After 7.5 years of alcoholism and intermittent drug abuse, my life is in shambles. But I can't just keep saying "focus on getting sober". I am sober. I have to start living. I don't feel ready
Well, a month sober has come.
After 7.5 years of alcoholism and intermittent drug abuse, my life is in shambles. But I can't just keep saying "focus on getting sober". I am sober. I have to start living. I don't feel ready
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Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 36
I was 1 month on the 3rd, so you are not too far behind. In that time I have cleared up my shambled existence, one grueling step at a time.
4 years of taxes, securing health ins, finances, living situation. I guess what I am trying to say is go ahead and just take that first step. Deal with the biggest problem you have and the rest will fall into place.
4 years of taxes, securing health ins, finances, living situation. I guess what I am trying to say is go ahead and just take that first step. Deal with the biggest problem you have and the rest will fall into place.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hey Fries - congrats on the month.
Most of us want to fix everything and fix it rght now but that's rarely possible right away.
Most of us find we fix something here, something there...its a piecemeal process.
Your plan to go to University in September is a good plan to work towards. What other kinds of things do you feel you have to fix?
D
Most of us want to fix everything and fix it rght now but that's rarely possible right away.
Most of us find we fix something here, something there...its a piecemeal process.
Your plan to go to University in September is a good plan to work towards. What other kinds of things do you feel you have to fix?
D
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
Good job FF! My life has been in shambles for a decade. I had two serious attempts at sobriety during this time where I crashed and burned because I got ahead of myself. I would sober up, go to AA, then get a job at 6 months sober, start dating etc. Lost focus.
I am using the opportunity this pandemic provides to really do nothing except focus on being in recovery. Nothing else to worry about. Finances, employment, relationships; they can all wait...
I am using the opportunity this pandemic provides to really do nothing except focus on being in recovery. Nothing else to worry about. Finances, employment, relationships; they can all wait...
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Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
Yeah, not feeling ready. I can identify with that. Nearly 5 months sober I am learning that feeling comes and goes. I chip away at the mountain. I neglected my life for many decades and just drank. Made a mess of everything and spread nothing but misery.
One month is great and you should be proud. But a month in I was often still in a state of stunned silence for part of each day. I think those feelings of uncertainty, of not knowing what to do next, wondering how we can fix our lives are all on a continuum. We just don't know how to stay present in every moment during the day so we start to let our brains spin. We aren't used to peace, calm and quiet and we simply don't trust those things at first.
You are still very far from the best you will feel about everything. Hang in there.
One month is great and you should be proud. But a month in I was often still in a state of stunned silence for part of each day. I think those feelings of uncertainty, of not knowing what to do next, wondering how we can fix our lives are all on a continuum. We just don't know how to stay present in every moment during the day so we start to let our brains spin. We aren't used to peace, calm and quiet and we simply don't trust those things at first.
You are still very far from the best you will feel about everything. Hang in there.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 4,788
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Your plan to go to University in September is a good plan to work towards. What other kinds of things do you feel you have to fix?
D
1) my grades in 2nd and 3rd year were awful so I need to study the 2nd and 3rd year materials so that I'm not behind the other 4th years in September. I need to do a few personal projects so I'm as capable as an engineer as others in my class. Ideally I would intern but that won't happen with corona
2) I need to work on my social anxiety so I'm not just taking zeros on group projects in 4th year
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
FF a long as you are remaining sober you are working towards your goals, even if it doesn't seem like it right now.
When I feel like this my strategy is to set the timer on my watch and give myself a goal to get something done in the time allotted. Then repeat. Helps me a lot.
When I feel like this my strategy is to set the timer on my watch and give myself a goal to get something done in the time allotted. Then repeat. Helps me a lot.
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