The Done Switch
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
The Done Switch
You either have it or you don't.
When someone decides to quit drinking....is it because their wifes? the courts? their kids? their jobs? their health? their finances? any other reason? Or is it because they are just DONE?
When the DONE switch comes on...it is a hell of a lot easier to quit drinking than for any of the "life" reasons.....
Drank since about 17 heavily I was "done" for many reasons that I had to be "done" for...kids, job, marriage, parents, finances. And I was putting 100% into being done each and every time...and each and every time I failed and would go back until I hit the age of 41.
At 41...I found myself on the floor seeing dead people walking across the paneling...and I prayed to "whatever" and said I PROMISE if I live thru this...I will not drink again....I do not want to....I have consumed enough for a lifetime...just please let me live.
The DONE SWITCH 100% turned on...and I stayed sober for 8 years. Enjoyed it...loved life....used AA....loved people...got thru a lot of ****...life ****....
Decided to drink in 2014....figured hell...8 years "I got this in control" Logically, I didn't drink for 8 years...certainly I just would drink maybe 1x a month?
I have drank since then with various attempts to stop...various attempts searching for that "done" feeling....When you hear that you have to do this for "you" there is nothing more true...It has to come from within and you can't even force it to come.....it just comes...
I wish my DONE switch would come back on...and if you have found yours...please, please, please....for yourself...listen to me....do NOT turn back on the switch because you can not turn it off whenever you want to.
When someone decides to quit drinking....is it because their wifes? the courts? their kids? their jobs? their health? their finances? any other reason? Or is it because they are just DONE?
When the DONE switch comes on...it is a hell of a lot easier to quit drinking than for any of the "life" reasons.....
Drank since about 17 heavily I was "done" for many reasons that I had to be "done" for...kids, job, marriage, parents, finances. And I was putting 100% into being done each and every time...and each and every time I failed and would go back until I hit the age of 41.
At 41...I found myself on the floor seeing dead people walking across the paneling...and I prayed to "whatever" and said I PROMISE if I live thru this...I will not drink again....I do not want to....I have consumed enough for a lifetime...just please let me live.
The DONE SWITCH 100% turned on...and I stayed sober for 8 years. Enjoyed it...loved life....used AA....loved people...got thru a lot of ****...life ****....
Decided to drink in 2014....figured hell...8 years "I got this in control" Logically, I didn't drink for 8 years...certainly I just would drink maybe 1x a month?
I have drank since then with various attempts to stop...various attempts searching for that "done" feeling....When you hear that you have to do this for "you" there is nothing more true...It has to come from within and you can't even force it to come.....it just comes...
I wish my DONE switch would come back on...and if you have found yours...please, please, please....for yourself...listen to me....do NOT turn back on the switch because you can not turn it off whenever you want to.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2019
Location: Chicago
Posts: 252
I hear you
I agree dont believe you can force it either...it has to be a point of being so done you will do anything it takes and its the priority. I also had a long stretch of sobriety with alcohol, drugs and food addiction and once i fed it, i realize i was right where i left off. Never worth it to test the waters again thinking we are fine now.
When you're there you know it in my opinion.
Im wanting to be there with my addictions and with drugs i believe im there. Food and alcohol not so sure yet...
When you're there you know it in my opinion.
Im wanting to be there with my addictions and with drugs i believe im there. Food and alcohol not so sure yet...
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: US
Posts: 264
I totally agree with you Misssy2. I stopped once in 2017 for 3 months and it was easy because I had that done switch. It took me 3 years before I got the switch back one day. I will never ever give that up again. It was hell coming out of that hole.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 135
Happened to me too. Was DONE by my own decision, no kids, no legal trouble, just DONE. Stopped for 3.5 yrs. Decided I could drink again. This time, I did get in trouble with the law. Still can’t find my DONE switch again. The law forcing me has almost made it worse, I know that is an addict voice talking, but I felt it was easier when it was my own choice.
All I can recommend is counseling, groups, lots of reading, and trying to string together more sober days at a time. I wish you the best. I understand. Xo
All I can recommend is counseling, groups, lots of reading, and trying to string together more sober days at a time. I wish you the best. I understand. Xo
Member
Join Date: Dec 2018
Posts: 405
This resonated with me big time Missy. After finishing a bottle of whiskey one night nearly three years ago in the dark it was as if the universe stood still. Just me and God. I looked at the bottle in my hand and said to myself..."done".
I don't know how it happened or why it happened but I don't ever want to try to capture lightning in a bottle for a second time. Thank you for this post.
I don't know how it happened or why it happened but I don't ever want to try to capture lightning in a bottle for a second time. Thank you for this post.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: West Tn
Posts: 3,043
Your Done Switch notion is interesting.
For me, it was the crushing defeat of 13 years of chronic alcoholism and the abject fear of losing my career.
I didn’t have money, but I had a rather nascent legal career which was not proceeding on a favorable path.
There is not a good market for drunk lawyers.
For those of you who are struggling, please hit the switch, accept defeat or whatever and get help (and stick with it every day).
For me, it was the crushing defeat of 13 years of chronic alcoholism and the abject fear of losing my career.
I didn’t have money, but I had a rather nascent legal career which was not proceeding on a favorable path.
There is not a good market for drunk lawyers.
For those of you who are struggling, please hit the switch, accept defeat or whatever and get help (and stick with it every day).
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 73
Powerful post and thanks. I am only on day 8 but yep I feel I have found my done switch for MYSELF. Not for GF or anyone. A few of you have hit on my biggest fear. Get sober and life will become great I beleive that as truth. I worry that down the road years later I will be feeling great and enter the booze dragon again. But for now I am just not drinking today.
Missy I hope you find that Done Switch again. You did it before so you can do it again. Good luck.
Missy I hope you find that Done Switch again. You did it before so you can do it again. Good luck.
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