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Old 02-28-2020, 08:55 AM
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Introduction

Not new to this site, just new to this username. I don't wish to relive all of my past failures, horror stories, etc.

A little bit about me: I am in my mid 30's, have 1 child that I have partial custody of and a decent, stable job that I have managed to hang on to through all of my drinking - even though I had to take a demotion a couple of years ago b/c I got a DWI and the position I was in required a driver's license.

So, like I said, there was the DWI plus 2 inpatient treatment facilities, a divorce, multiple wrecked vehicles which always results in lies to everyone about how it happened, fights with random people, blackouts that caused me physical injuries, being mentally and physically ill, lost time with my son, family, friends, etc. Do you think any of this stopped me from picking up a drink?? No way!!

Well, after another embarrassing, destructive and drunken night recently of which I will not go into great detail... I am going to try this sobriety thing again. I have got to get this right someway, somehow. If not, I will end up dead or in prison, there is no doubt in my mind.

I don't know what my plan is yet and I would rather not dive into that right this minute. At the very least, I know that this is a good jumping off point (being on SR). Just wanted to introduce myself and ask for your support. Today is day 2.
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Old 02-28-2020, 08:59 AM
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Welcome to the family. I hope our support can help you get sober for good.
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Old 02-28-2020, 09:03 AM
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Welcome (back) D2D!
As you write yourself, you have come to the right place.
During the earliest days of my sobriety, I had no other plan than not to take the first glass of wine. After a week or two, I felt ready to make a sort of a plan. This has worked for me on these first days of my journey. Keep it simple untill the worst WD is over. The first week(s) is heavy enough.
Keep on going, and keep on posting!
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Old 02-28-2020, 09:08 AM
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Whats up D2D? Hope to hear about your plan sooner than later. Good to have your back on SR.
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Old 02-28-2020, 09:10 AM
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Congratulations on your start. When I started I didn't have much of a plan either, and I just made it up as I went along. That's probably contrary to all advice, but it worked for me.
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Old 02-28-2020, 09:46 AM
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Welcome back!
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Old 02-28-2020, 10:24 AM
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Welcome friend! Glad you are here.
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Old 02-28-2020, 12:07 PM
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Thanks everyone. I appreciate the support.
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Old 02-28-2020, 01:05 PM
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Hi D2D. Glad you are here with us. "I don't wish to relive all of my past failures", "of which I will not go into great detail" and "I would rather not dive into that right this minute". I think you might be a little resistant and closed off right now, but that's ok. Let's get sober and healthy, once and for all. I'm 3+ months sober for the first time in over 30 years. You are wise to get this figured out at such a young age. I'm 20 years gone from you and there is nothing I wouldn't give to have those 20 years back sober. Don't lose another decade or two to drinking. Give yourself the better part of your life to live healthy, calm and clear-headed. It will be amazing.
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Old 02-28-2020, 01:20 PM
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Yes I too would love to have the 30 years back I wasted. Stay on the path. So much around us, happy and sad. Yet living always, and I mean always is far better sober.
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Old 02-28-2020, 01:43 PM
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And when thoughts continue to enter your mind of living might not be better...that's when you know addiction has taken over your mind, body and soul.
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Old 02-28-2020, 02:43 PM
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Drink2Destruct - I'm so glad you posted about what's going on. You realize now that there is no control once that first drink hits you. It took me many years to finally get it - no willpower or determination will be enough to keep us safe. Every time it was in my system dangerous & unpredictable things happened. It's wonderful to finally be free of it & to know I'll no longer sabotage myself with insane behavior.

You can do it this time - you sound determined to make this change. We're here to help.
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Old 02-28-2020, 03:38 PM
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Welcome back

I know it's the last thing you want to do right now but don't put off that plan for too long - it really is vital to be prepared

D
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Old 02-28-2020, 05:22 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Welcome back

I know it's the last thing you want to do right now but don't put off that plan for too long - it really is vital to be prepared

D
I know and I am working on it. For now, the plan is to of course not pick up that first drink - managed that today. Read and post on SR and join the Feb. 2020 class - did that and I am going to attend a local SMART Recovery meeting this coming Tuesday after work - that is the first one I can get to.
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Old 02-29-2020, 07:18 AM
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I hope your night went well D2D. That sleep thing is elusive at first but that is the least of our worries, right? Plan to stay really active this weekend. No down moments. Keep moving, reading, napping, eating healthy, hydrating, doing a bit of clean up. Hope you have a peaceful sober weekend and that you don't drink.
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Old 02-29-2020, 10:02 AM
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A great plan D2D. I can tell you really want sobriety. Need sobriety.

Keep posting and I hope the SMART meeting goes well. Lots of water too.
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Old 02-29-2020, 12:38 PM
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Welcome back to SR.
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Old 02-29-2020, 12:40 PM
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I am also a very destructive drinker. No matter how many consequences, I always return to booze eventually. I barely remember the things I do but because I live alone, I am never sure. It causes unbearable anxiety. My bank account will be empty and I have no recollection on what I just spent a thousand dollars on. Drives ne to drink even more....
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Old 02-29-2020, 01:57 PM
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I jetted straight through all the classic red flags that usually pull people up much later in life, in my teens.

If wrecking a car, waking up in hospital with no recollection of how I got there, getting beaten up, losing a relationship etc had been enough to pull me up, I would have stopped about age 18.

.

.
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Old 02-29-2020, 10:58 PM
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Welcome D2D. I am about your age. Good to realize and stop at our age. Check out AVRT online. That has really helped me so far. I love Charlotte by the way. Panthers fan here!
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