Welp, I relapsed. Doggone it!!!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
It's a life-long struggle. I don't beat myself up about relapse as much as I do about trying to stop. Sobering up is the struggle because I don't want the vague memories to come flooding back. For example, "where are my keys, wallet, cell phone???". Then I start to vaguely remember things that may or may not have happened. Just not sure. Something we all have to deal with...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,540
I agree Wastinglife, it bloody 'orrible.
(Also) The rehab environment is so different to the 'real' word. There are constraints in rehab, with entire day to day activity focussed on not drinking, sobriety.
When back in the real world we are finding our feet, and slips can occur. Same as learning anything. Yet we learn, and that's the main thing.
(Also) The rehab environment is so different to the 'real' word. There are constraints in rehab, with entire day to day activity focussed on not drinking, sobriety.
When back in the real world we are finding our feet, and slips can occur. Same as learning anything. Yet we learn, and that's the main thing.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
Originally Posted by Horn95 
oh, excuse me master toda. I have not attained your level of sobriety wisdom.
I want to keep you as a friend. But re-read your post. It reeks of arrogance and judgement. I have a lot of work to do. And yes, the problem is I am still at a point of drinking like it is a haircut. Just don’t be a jerk about it.
i came on here looking for help. Not a “we’re similar but I did better post.” Think about what you wrote.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Horn, surely you can understand that your reaction to your relapse is a bit of a head scratcher. You were at in patient rehab for a month or so, and then thought you could get away on a business trip, get drunk, get sobered up and everyone none of the wiser. Turned out to be an 8 day bender (fyi, an 8 day bender just might kill me). Your reaction in the title: doggone it! Doggone it is what I say when I lock my keys in the car, doggone it is what I say when I missed a touchdown being scored from my favorite team.
Doggone it is not what I say when I know the poison I am playing with has the ability (and desire) to take away everything of value to me, and possibly my family, my health and my life. Just sayin dude.
Doggone it is not what I say when I know the poison I am playing with has the ability (and desire) to take away everything of value to me, and possibly my family, my health and my life. Just sayin dude.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hey Horn
I hope you are doing well. It takes a lot of courage and willingness to be vulnerable and post about a bender.
One thing I really struggle with is taking 'things' personally. I know. Its human to do so. But is it useful? Forget about what is being said by another person. I ultimately have no idea what another's intent or motive is, especially here on the internet. But I do have a choice on whether or not to attach to it. Make it part of my narrative.
Humans are sensitive. Well sometimes
And even tho addicts don't have the corner on sensitivity, I do think we, or at least I, rely too much on the outside world to define my sense of self. Sheesh, talk about powerless!
When I decide who I am, what I am, what my motives and intent are, I am taking back that power and making it mine, completely. When I let others determine how I feel about myself, I am truly blowing in the wind.
Hang in there.
I hope you are doing well. It takes a lot of courage and willingness to be vulnerable and post about a bender.
One thing I really struggle with is taking 'things' personally. I know. Its human to do so. But is it useful? Forget about what is being said by another person. I ultimately have no idea what another's intent or motive is, especially here on the internet. But I do have a choice on whether or not to attach to it. Make it part of my narrative.
Humans are sensitive. Well sometimes
And even tho addicts don't have the corner on sensitivity, I do think we, or at least I, rely too much on the outside world to define my sense of self. Sheesh, talk about powerless! When I decide who I am, what I am, what my motives and intent are, I am taking back that power and making it mine, completely. When I let others determine how I feel about myself, I am truly blowing in the wind.
Hang in there.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Salt Lake City, UT
Posts: 1,132
Originally Posted by thomas11
Horn, surely you can understand that your reaction to your relapse is a bit of a head scratcher. You were at in patient rehab for a month or so, and then thought you could get away on a business trip, get drunk, get sobered up and everyone none of the wiser. Turned out to be an 8 day bender (fyi, an 8 day bender just might kill me). Your reaction in the title: doggone it! Doggone it is what I say when I lock my keys in the car, doggone it is what I say when I missed a touchdown being scored from my favorite team.
Doggone it is not what I say when I know the poison I am playing with has the ability (and desire) to take away everything of value to me, and possibly my family, my health and my life. Just sayin dude.
Doggone it is not what I say when I know the poison I am playing with has the ability (and desire) to take away everything of value to me, and possibly my family, my health and my life. Just sayin dude.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
Originally Posted by HeadEast
My hell people, he relapsed. Does it really matter how he said it or what words he used? Shouldn't we be helping him regain sobriety? Geez.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,474
Just a reminder:
Please keep your comments focused on the OP, not other members.
Please use Ignore if someone's posts upset you.
Horn, I hope you check in and let us know how you're doing.
Please keep your comments focused on the OP, not other members.
Please use Ignore if someone's posts upset you.
Horn, I hope you check in and let us know how you're doing.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,540
On your side Horn. Let us know how you are doing, hey.
Horn I've relapsed so many times it ain't funny. Seventy six says today. It's good.
Heard someone say, "whatever anyone else thinks about me is none of my business."
Hope you are ok.
Horn I've relapsed so many times it ain't funny. Seventy six says today. It's good.
Heard someone say, "whatever anyone else thinks about me is none of my business."
Hope you are ok.
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