Spacegoat

Whatever the appointment- I'll just turn up, tell the truth and do my best.

Exactly what I have been doing for my whole adult life now.

It's how I have been treated in return is the problem.

Nite folks

Surrendered19

Science-based health therapy for me. My addiction counselor mainly focuses on cognitive behavioral therapy but has a keen interest in the physical causes of addiction. Lots of mounting research and evidence there. I don't do god or spirituality and he also focuses on agnostic/atheist clients.

Spacegoat

Would imagine that would usually be the first port of call.

Religion or spirituality should be a personal choice

Surrendered19

I don't know if my way of approaching this fight will be my first port of call or my last. I hope it is both. I study extensively about what alcohol does to the physical structures of body and brain. And what happens to those structures when I quit drinking. Just one tool I use to understand and make sense of it and thus avoid it in the future. The support I get from my sober group is big too. As is this site. I spend at least a few hours each day on SR trying to support others and seeking support for myself through our shared stories.

Spacegoat

Same as that. I dunno either, as I seem to be dealing with a lot of unknown variables here, as well as the know ones. Which are more that most would be able to. It's heavy stuff, for sure.

Have been keep hearing that 'all of the problem's can be resolved' but never any meaningful suggestions as to how. Enforced homelessness and dehumanisation hasnt helped very much, anyway. Who can approach anything from a place of such unhappiness and absolute grief ?

Best advice I have heard yet has actually come from my father. Which is this- Your situation needs to be broken down into smaller parts. I couldnt agree more. Been meaning to bring that up with him again, although now is not the time, nor is he the ideal candidate to do so (still).

I've had no peacetime or comfort my whole life now, nor any real counselling for any of it. And the problems have just gotten bigger and greater throughout. Meanwhile I have been working my butt off for the sake of others, all along. Yeah that sucks. The proverbial horse and cart...

Surrendered19

Meaningful suggestions for your situation might be a difficult ask Spacegoat. The enormity of what you are dealing with likely defies easy solution. My problem is far more simple than yours - I cannot drink anymore and I am an alcoholic. It is a tough stubborn problem, but one that can be fought from various angles and on various fronts. Why did I drink? What will make me drink again? How can I make myself strong and ready for future temptation?
CPTSD on the other hand sounds like alcoholism on steroids and taking place in different dimensions and times.

My fervent wish is that you eventually live in peacetime and find comfort. You deserve both of those things every day from here on out. And I am sorry that I too am in the category of lacking meaningful suggestions for you.

Spacegoat

You're not wrong about that- the latter part at least. Thanks also.

I already know most of the solutions, and can see them in a future sense. Although, now that I think of it- some things will surely never be right. My family is destroyed, on both sides. That is actually quite sad. I'm still young enough (just about) to find lasting happiness, but other's arent. It's about what can be salvaged for them, I guess. Me also to some degree.

Anyway, these solutions... They would involve a lot of resources which we currently dont have - for one reason or another. (time & energy). And I'm unsure if I even have a future in this country, in the long run (remains to be seen, healthwise). I have interests elsewhere.

Some people really need to start taking accountablilty for their actions, though. In one way or another. We dont get to have a 'new earth' otherwise. And the problems get passed on to the next generation, once again. Which has already kinda happened here, shamefully.

Spacegoat

I have to say this though- there is a consultant psychiatrist around here, whom I do not want 'on my case' under any circumstance. That's not a case, it's criminal. To say that my health went downhill 'under his care' (more like under hypnosis) would be an understatement. He's the one who should be under investigation.

I can recall every time he showed up (in various locations), every word said, every lie and obfuscation- and the result's of same. There is something not right about that guy (probably evil). I notice his demeaneor has changed this past few years though, as with some other a-holes around these parts. Victims everywhere.

I'll be putting the same in writing, to simply safeguard myself from similar abuses. I didn't pay my taxes to be driven insane and/or killed methodically -by any doctor. Totally unforgiveable, by any stretch of the 'imagination'...

"Of all the forms of inequality, injustice in health is the most shocking and inhumane"

Indeed.

Spacegoat

It's a crazy situation guy's....

And I'm not the crazy one. Nor anything that could be even misconstrued as bad or dark etc.

I should not be in this position and everyone knows it

Surrendered19

I'm sorry you are hurting man. I don't know anything specific about your situation so it is hard to offer specific support. But I will say that you deserve peace and rest and health, just like the rest of us. I surmise that you have been deeply hurt through service to others? If that is the case, you deserve the support of those that you served. And for the record I do not think you are crazy, bad or dark. I think you are in pain.

Spacegoat

Didn't see this last night. Thank you Surrendered.

You're exactly right about everything in your post...


We'll get there thanks again

Spacegoat

Lo and behold, opened the paper here yesterday and there is a report about the facility to which I'm referring (local MHS).

It states that the facility has been found to be 'consistently non-compliant' (with the law I'm guessing) re: care-plans.


Doctors destroying health...

It's not a theory.

peace!

Surrendered19

You don't need to seek validation on this site Spacegoat. I haven't seen anyone question your assessment of your situation and how you have been mistreated. We are on your side brother.

Spacegoat

I appreciate that Surrendered. Truly. The vast majority of people are, from the micro to the macro, is what I've noticed.

(Initially while sleeping rough and rapping elements of the gospel down the town here . Eh, sorry but - ho,ho,ho, also!)

Had random people approach me to say things like, "keep going, dont give up". I wont, as failure was never an option tbh.


This has been a heavy thread so far, so to lighten the mood a little;



Sound the Trumpette's G_d has sense of humour, surely.


You know what they say- winners focus on winning, while losers focus on winners.

An interesting twist where their camera's are concerned...


In all seriousness though, I dont even hate them. It must suck to be them. Imagine having no feels?

And having it so bad that you actually had to steal same from children, the elderly and the entire world at this point.


I kinda feel sorry for them- but that's just me.

In any case: "It's time the tale were told, Of how you took a child, And you made him old"

(stressor warning^)


One love Thanks folks

Spacegoat

Hello again guys. So, some controversy...

About this hostel: Some refer to it as an 'open prison'. Some say its more like a 'gulag'. I'm saying it's like a concentration camp. And there is a link, albeit directly or indirectly, or both...

The fact of the matter is this- many people have died there. Of all ages and all backgrounds. Here's part of a review someone left on google:

It is a punishment of some description. I'm not saying anything about the staff, as most of them agree that it's a very strange place. And many people believe that it should be investigated, tbh.

Speaking of investigations- I seen the consultant hypno-psychiatrist yesterday evening. Spotted him from half a mile away in his new 'republican red' automobile. He's no republican. He seen me too and kept his head down.

There is a link between the psychiatric facility (which is under investigation) and the hostel, which is the subject of this thread.

'Investigate to assimilate'

Just an update. Thanks

Dee74

what happened re you moving out SG?

D

Spacegoat

I've moved twice Dee and I'm preparing to move again. I wont be in any hurry to see this town again (which is kinda unfair to the good people)

Updated the thread as I seen the hypno-shrink drive by. He's definitely a person of interest. Occult psychiatry. He tried to hide his face aswell.

What has transpired over the past 5 years here is mindblowing. It has literally been the worst time of my life. Barely surviving w/ no peace. The local authorities systematically denied me my basic civil, and human rights. Smug about it too,and aggressive, some of them were. Meanwhile I was surrounded day in, day out by negative energies, criminal and psychopathic behaviours.

Threatened & intimidated.5 years that I cant get back. When I should have been working on something that's never gonna to be done now. How can they do this? In the end they turned around and said 'oh sorry, we didn't know your background'. But yet, they knew what I had for breakfast...

I've been told that documents will go missing if I choose to pursue them legally (the local authorities). Plus they have compromising photos of me from the hostel (in the toilet e.g- that is how bad the gangstalking got)

It's completely sick and twisted. They were actively suppressing a child abuse case. Other people now have destroyed every aspect of my life, so where do we go from here???

I would be as well off to seek compensation from my original abusers at this point- it is an option- as how could anyone go on living like this. Nobody did anything to help!

Dee74

I'm sorry for all the things that happened to you - hopefully the next move can be like a new start?

D

Steely

This has been a really interesting thread Spacegoat.

I'm diagnosed with ptsd plus I'm an addict. Seriously thinking I might have the more complex variety. I fit the criteria. Lifetimes.

Hope you have a safe place to sleep tonight Spacegoat.

Spacegoat

Steely, my friend. We have stuff in common, I picked up on that.

I have suffered enormously with PTSD in the past, to the point of disorder. That- is hell. I still suffer with symptoms, but I manage well. I also suffer from some dissociation, but not to the point of disorder.

Planning to start a thread about specifically these, a daily journal, just to keep me occupied. I know a lot about these things. And I am going to heal from this, plus use my experiences for some good also. Been working at it my whole life- surviving or thriving- and these days, I know that I'm not the only one.

On a waiting list here for what I'm presuming should be good quality counselling & therapy. I can do alot by myself also, as that's what I'm used to. It is all about love, at the end of the day. Thanks for your concern, dude.

*I'm dealing with a historical abuse case btw. I know from my research that it's been a big problem in your part of the world, just as it here, and everywhere. Been really impressed with the quality of cases & documentation, care and concern that I've seen from Australia. Fair play, mates. This stuff has been going on for far too long already.

Dee, my good man. That's the idea, complete overhall, and I'm looking forward to it. It's not without it's problems but the solutions should be there also. To the future (soon, please, God) Thanks for all you do, btw

So about my 'guerilla style' writing, again, last night. There is a method to the madness...

Having been up all night with the 'who, what, where, when, why's'...

... Again, today, I got my answer.

I have to put this here guys, as I have nowhere else to right now...

*Trigger/stress warning, I guess, in a way...

It's the local priest- 'little red riding hoodlum' (not his real name)

+

The consultant psychiatrist- 'Stupor Mario' (also not his real name)

These are two who are ultimately responsible for my problems here (i.e how I have I have been treated- systematically sidelined, denied basic rights, and so on...)

I have no way of knowing this officially, as yet, it's all subconscious work. But I had to deal with these two together over a decade ago when they were working at the local MHS facility.

I was there 'drying out'... Another part of the scam as that's how they get people in. I broke out of there btw. Snuck out, more accurately. I had to or I might still be there. Went back then to sign a release form for the good guys who work there.

So yeah, my work here in this town is done for now (hopefully). I'm glad I wrote this up, I wouldn't have had ye not commented and was pissed off this evening, knowing that I would have to go through the same thing again. So thanks for that!

These two suspects demeanors have changed so much, lol. Already noted about the shrink, but in the past year the 'little priest' has scowled at me in town, has aggressively 'thrown shapes' in the foyer of Tesco (it should be on their camera system) - I LOL'd, and more recently he drove by and cautiously threw a 'Child of Fatima' hand sign. I actually waved back, as I didn't see who it was until he had gone by. They're on the backfoot...

"Only God can judge our enemies"but...

So yeah, interesting thread Steely! About the boasting (lol) I'm not sure how helpful it is, just something I enjoy. It's a future trip. The future proves the past, so they say...

Thanks a whole lot guys