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Going back to work

Old 01-21-2020, 09:43 AM
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Going back to work

Going back to work tomorrow. I have been off work since my detox in the ER on December 17th. I’ve never been off work for more than a week and those were vacations. Even when I switched jobs, I would start the new one the day after.

I could’ve went back a few days after my detox but I ultimately decided to take an unpaid month off. Just to take some time and refocus my life. It has been so hectic over the past 5 years that I never took the time to slow down.

Scared and excited at the same time. Scared that I now have to face a job with knowing I can’t reward myself with a buzz at the end of the day. Excited that I’m going to finally live a life that I can be proud of.

My vacation is over. Over the past month I have really cherished my extra time with the kids, got my priorities in order, lost 12 pounds and got cleared by my doctor that I’m perfectly healthy again. Most importantly I started down the road of sobriety and rediscovering the person that my family can be proud of.

It’s been a helluva month
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Old 01-21-2020, 09:53 AM
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Good luck man, stay strong. Life will only continue to get better.
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Old 01-21-2020, 10:24 AM
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It does sound like it's been a good month for you. I'm glad you were able to take some time off and focus on yourself and your family. Good luck getting back to work.
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Old 01-21-2020, 10:36 AM
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Congrats on your accomplishments this month!

Start of a new way of living for you and your family.

Best to you
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Old 01-21-2020, 10:36 AM
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I don't know your background, but if it is anything close to me I can offer my testimony regarding quitting.

I quit after a health scare. I was 50 years old. I had been drinking off and on for about 45 years.

When it came to work, folks were nice, but there were always some fun jabs about my drinking issues. I don't care what people really think.

Mentally, i was a mess for several months. I could feel myself healing, but it wasn't happening fast. Relapse loomed routinely. I suffered like hell to get through the first several months.

As I passed 1 year, I almost relapsed. As I passed 2 years, same thing.

Now here I am, I don't really crave, but I deal with all the issues associated with the crave. Mostly obsessions and routine mental what if scenarios that have negative consequences. Weird? Insane? Yes and yes.

It is ok. Because I am clean as a whistle. I could easily end up on meds, but if I made it this far without them, no need to start now.

I can feel myself getting better and dealing with life every moment. I really has boiled down to taking care of me and my family.

Everything else is a very distant third place.

I pray constantly.

Thanks.
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Old 01-21-2020, 10:47 AM
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You starting on a journey. If you think of it like that it is a lot more fun. There are hazards that you have to avoid or deal with but you know how bad you want this and you can handle it. You have to do it for yourself. Best wishes for you on your journey!
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Old 01-21-2020, 10:53 AM
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Originally Posted by VinnyMcM View Post
Going back to work tomorrow. I have been off work since my detox in the ER on December 17th. I’ve never been off work for more than a week and those were vacations. Even when I switched jobs, I would start the new one the day after.

I could’ve went back a few days after my detox but I ultimately decided to take an unpaid month off. Just to take some time and refocus my life. It has been so hectic over the past 5 years that I never took the time to slow down.

Scared and excited at the same time. Scared that I now have to face a job with knowing I can’t reward myself with a buzz at the end of the day. Excited that I’m going to finally live a life that I can be proud of.

My vacation is over. Over the past month I have really cherished my extra time with the kids, got my priorities in order, lost 12 pounds and got cleared by my doctor that I’m perfectly healthy again. Most importantly I started down the road of sobriety and rediscovering the person that my family can be proud of.

It’s been a helluva month
What a great use of your time, VMc.

Now you have to face your job (btw is it the same job?) with knowing you can reward yourself with: extra time with the kids; maintaining and revising the order of your priorities; eating well, exercising, continue to rediscover the person that your family can be proud of, including, if I may be so bold, your SR family, and including last, and most: Vinny McM, because Skinny Vinny and the rest of the items on the list rely on VinnyMcM being proud of VinnyMcM.

And what about ice fishing? You are from Wisconsin, right? Take the kids? How old are they?
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Old 01-21-2020, 11:11 AM
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Originally Posted by VinnyMcM View Post
Going back to work tomorrow. My vacation is over. Over the past month I have really cherished my extra time with the kids, got my priorities in order, lost 12 pounds and got cleared by my doctor that I’m perfectly healthy again. Most importantly I started down the road of sobriety and rediscovering the person that my family can be proud of.It’s been a helluva month
Good Luck!!! Proud of You!!!
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Old 01-21-2020, 11:30 AM
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That's great! Make a plan for tomorrow evening, so you enjoy the first day back and sober, with your family. You can do this!
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Old 01-21-2020, 11:32 AM
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I hope you have a great first day back Vinny. I found that any issue at work was so much easier to deal with a clear head. I also use exercise as my end of day destressor, it helps.
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Old 01-21-2020, 11:50 AM
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Originally Posted by VinnyMcM View Post
Scared that I now have to face a job with knowing I can’t reward myself with a buzz at the end of the day.
The reward will be the contrast of being at home compared with being at work. Booze is simply off the table. This leaves you room to think about other things, like how good you're always gonna feel the next morning, and what takeaway you might order in, as a well-earned treat
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Old 01-21-2020, 12:52 PM
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Originally Posted by jr67 View Post
What a great use of your time, VMc.

Now you have to face your job (btw is it the same job?) with knowing you can reward yourself with: extra time with the kids; maintaining and revising the order of your priorities; eating well, exercising, continue to rediscover the person that your family can be proud of, including, if I may be so bold, your SR family, and including last, and most: Vinny McM, because Skinny Vinny and the rest of the items on the list rely on VinnyMcM being proud of VinnyMcM.

And what about ice fishing? You are from Wisconsin, right? Take the kids? How old are they?
I quit the job that really amped up my drinking. Coincidentally, it was in the alcohol industry. My thought was “I love beer. I’m going to get a career selling it!” Good money and high stress. The endless free supply of alcohol sounds like a dream to some. Not for an alcoholic. That was pure misery. I’m now at a lower paying, stress free job where I have to leave the house each day. Works well for me right now but I’ll be looking for something else. My goal is to get out of sales.

My kids are 4 and 7. Too dang cold to enjoy ice fishing. I don’t drink and I don’t like the cold. I sure picked the wrong state to live in .
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Old 01-21-2020, 12:58 PM
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Good news for you. I’m going in fro some blood work very soon. Did you get you blood work done again for the doc to give you a clean bill of health?

Just curious as I’m in a similar place that you are. Any health details on would be helpful as heck to me.,
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Old 01-21-2020, 01:09 PM
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Originally Posted by JADIII View Post
Good news for you. I’m going in fro some blood work very soon. Did you get you blood work done again for the doc to give you a clean bill of health?

Just curious as I’m in a similar place that you are. Any health details on would be helpful as heck to me.,
Yes I got bloodwork done 3 times. My ER visit, one week later, and one week ago.

During my detox at the ER, my blood pressure was in the 180/120 range with a pulse of ~150. My liver enzymes were 6x-7x the normal level. I was in bad shape to say the least.

My final blood check on my liver were completely normal as well as the rest of my organs. My blood pressure is now a perfect 120/80. The body’s ability to recover is amazing. I consider myself very lucky.

I’m very transparent about my drinking and recovery process. I’m assuming since you are asking since you are new to recovery as am I. Reach out via PM if you have any questions I may be able to help with
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Old 01-21-2020, 01:25 PM
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So very happy for you Vinny.
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Old 01-21-2020, 02:55 PM
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Originally Posted by VinnyMcM View Post
I quit the job that really amped up my drinking. Coincidentally, it was in the alcohol industry. My thought was “I love beer. I’m going to get a career selling it!” Good money and high stress. The endless free supply of alcohol sounds like a dream to some. Not for an alcoholic. That was pure misery. I’m now at a lower paying, stress free job where I have to leave the house each day. Works well for me right now but I’ll be looking for something else. My goal is to get out of sales.

My kids are 4 and 7. Too dang cold to enjoy ice fishing. I don’t drink and I don’t like the cold. I sure picked the wrong state to live in .
Omg 4 and 7! How can you stand the cuteness? Do you read to them? Great that they won't be getting used to Daddy's "funny" beer-breath when he tucks them in and kisses them good night. Great for them, and great for Daddy.

My Daddy never tucked us in at night, ttbomm.* More's the pity. He wasn't a drunk though. It's just that he, like so many of his generation, and like so many of a lot of generations, considered that to be, as he used to say sometimes, "your mother's department." You know, stuff like planning the menus on a tight budget, doing the grocery shopping, making the meals, doing the dishes, drying them and putting them away in the days before they could afford a dishwasher, doing the laundry for seven IRL (in real life) people, doing the ironing for seven IRL people before permanent press was even a thing, making sure the 5 kids were up, dressed in matching shoes (not all 5 kids in the same shoes, just making sure each one kid's two shoes matched each other), getting Dad to the train station every morning, 5/7, for the 7:25 a.m. to the city before the tracks were electrified, after that it was maybe the 7:45 or something so he still was in the office at his desk at 9 a.m., 5/7, picking him up at the station every evening 5/7 at 6:45 p.m. before the tracks were electrified, after that it was maybe the 6:10.

* Ttbomm = To the best of my memory.

"Your mother's department," cont'd: Having dinner on the table for the five kids at 6 p.m. sharp, 5/7; big sister in charge while Mommy went to pick Daddy up at the station. Mommy and Daddy's peas and carrots were simmering slowly on the stove. If the train was late the pan would dry out and the peas and carrots would burn and the 5 of us would be oblivious to clouds of smoke in the kitchen cuz we were good little boys and girls doing our homework or watching tv or bouncing off some wall or other (each of us is different). Nobody had smoke detectors back then.

No, there were no cell phones or anything back then, are you kidding?, so she couldn't call to make sure the big sisters turned off the vegetables. And only one tv, black and white, so the decision as to what station to watch would be the result of some chaotic bargaining process. It helped to be one of the older ones, more practiced in the cunning arts of self-dealing. There were only 3 stations to choose from, for the most part, anyway.

And if (when) we squabbled in jr's family's house it was "your mother's department" to resolve the petty disputes, Dad in his chair right there in the living room after they ate, the evening paper that he hadn't finished on the train unfolded in front of him, oblivious to one of us or another whining away while Mommy was still finishing up the dishes. But don't get me wrong I know this is SR but he wasn't a big drinker. He was oblivious but not because he had been drinking, just because the crossword puzzle or the comics were just so engrossing and after all, he had been hard at work all day.

He never read to us, at bedtime ttbomm either. That was her department, too, at least until we, the 5 of us, in turn got successively old enough to read to one or more of the younger ones. The youngest, I dunno, maybe he read to the kissy-fish and neon tetras in the aquarium maintained by (guess who?) Mommy.

Does your 7-year-old read to the 4-year-old, Vinny? Highly recommended.

Did I mention that Mommy worked?

(Q. Well whattaya call all of the above? A. I already told ya, "Your mother's department.")

But yeah, she did that stuff, but she worked too. She was a school teacher, so she did the above stuff in between handling her own job. And when one of the 5 of us got sick somehow there was a plan for that, Mommy took care of implementing the plan but never took a day off from work.

She wasn't a substance abuser either. In those days they never drank Monday to Friday. Saturday afternoon they might have a cocktail hour. A manhattan, carefully measured out and mixed using the cocktail set I still have to this day. Maybe they had 2 apiece once in a while, some cheese and crackers. Same on Sundays, or possibly over to an aunt's house or Grandma's for Sunday dinner and maybe then they had three, but not usually.

So where did jr's substance abusive tendencies find their root? Hard to say. And won't be said here, because: (a) I haven't gotten to that part yet; and (b) this is Vinny's thread, the last I checked.

So Vinny: With your new job, your new hours, your new sobriety:

What an excuse to watch Thomas the Tank Engine 7 times in a row, or read it, or whatever they are watching and reading now. That's a pretty good one though, imho. Highly recommended. Soon, if not already, for the 7-year-old it'll be High School Musical and Diary of a Wimpy Kid. Man, Vinny, you are so lucky.

Savor each moment Vinny, now while it is the now, and later when it will be the memory.

How about bowling? Does anyone go bowling any more? That's something somebody could look forward to doing after work. When we were a little older my Dad was in a bowling league. Come to think of it my mother was in the teacher's league, but we were older then, so that's a different story.

Hey Vin, do you know what kind of job you'd like to transition to out of sales? Up to you whether to answer here, I was just curious but it's not like I hafta know or anything. I was just wondering whether you knew, that's all.

You don't hafta know right now.

There is time.

One day at a time, last I checked.
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Old 01-21-2020, 03:02 PM
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best of luck Vinny

D
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Old 01-21-2020, 05:12 PM
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Originally Posted by VinnyMcM View Post
I don’t drink and I don’t like the cold. I sure picked the wrong state to live in .
You sure did!!
Good luck tomorrow!
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Old 01-21-2020, 05:16 PM
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Hope it all goes well Vinny.

I got out of sales and into truck driving to ensure I wasn't going to be in the firing line of those long lunches and taking out clients for drinks to close deals etc etc.

It's worked for 5.5 years so far.
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Old 01-21-2020, 05:21 PM
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Have a good day at work tomorrow Vinny.
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