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Old 01-10-2020, 06:28 AM   #1 (permalink)
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80 hours


Iím here 80 hours in, without a drop. Thatís 3 days and 8 hours. Iíve gone ten weeks before so this is no where near my longest but Iím so grateful I managed to stop at all, just 3 short days ago I didnít know if could even get here. Iím sure Iím past the danger zone regarding withdrawal now - very healthy appetite and the weird jerkiness of my body has mostly gone away. And today I actually feel sober. I binged watched a Netflix series last night to take the edge off and have my mind focussed on something else. I canít even think about college right now though, I messaged my tutor without going into details and she said thatís fine and to take the time I need.

Iím not sure where life will take me now, it sounds silly but I feel I really canít focus on anything but the here and now at this moment in time. All I know about is hat I want from my life right now is to be sober, thatís all I want. Just wanted to check in and thank you all again for helping me the last week or so, itís been very humbling and is much appreciated ❤️
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Old 01-10-2020, 06:38 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Just get through one hour at a time.
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Old 01-10-2020, 06:43 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Progress not perfection my friend. Keep doing what your doing. Let them sober days add up. Get the funk out of ya. Your body and mind arw in the healing stage. You be aight. ✌
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Old 01-10-2020, 06:50 AM   #4 (permalink)
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You're doing great.
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Old 01-10-2020, 07:43 AM   #5 (permalink)
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A lot different than 4 days ago SM. That is awesome. Clear, calm, liberated and on our right roads. That is what the decade of the 20's needs to be for us.
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Old 01-10-2020, 10:27 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Great to read of your progress. Keep up the great work
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Old 01-10-2020, 01:54 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Well done
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Old 01-10-2020, 02:06 PM   #8 (permalink)
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A lot different than 4 days ago SM. That is awesome. Clear, calm, liberated and on our right roads. That is what the decade of the 20's needs to be for us.

Clear, calm, liberated...

I'll second that!
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Old 01-10-2020, 02:54 PM   #9 (permalink)
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day 3 is great but yeah - I was pretty fuzzy then too.

Theres time enough to sort out life the universe and everything - just staying sober is enough for now

D
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Old 01-10-2020, 04:14 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I think it's pretty awesome also. Keep going and congratulations.
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Old 01-10-2020, 04:31 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Three days is great Mario!
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ďIt is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.Ē
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Old 01-10-2020, 05:16 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Awesome for you! Iím on day 9 and iím gaining more clarity with each new day!
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Old 01-11-2020, 11:34 PM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm glad to see you're doing better, SM!
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I realized I could probably go on drinking like this for maybe two or three more years, or live for another two or three decades...but not both. Suddenly the choice became crystal clear.
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Old 01-12-2020, 01:51 AM   #14 (permalink)
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5 days in. Well, itís a start!

I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now Iím just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, Iím a Brit!).

Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, itís the only life Iíve ever known. Iíve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.

Happy Sunday everyone
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Old 01-12-2020, 04:47 AM   #15 (permalink)
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5 days in. Well, itís a start!

I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now Iím just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, Iím a Brit!).

Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, itís the only life Iíve ever known. Iíve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.

Happy Sunday everyone

​​​​​​Its great to have those first five days over you.

It makes perfect sense what you say about knowing how to be a responsible adult. I guess step by step you'll figure things out. Getting sober is a good start.
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Old 01-12-2020, 04:56 AM   #16 (permalink)
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That is great SuperMario. Sorry you are feeling down at the moment but your trajectory is good right? Remember the hangovers. Mine were soul-crushing whole body affairs. A bit down, but calm, clear and quiet in your mind is so preferable to that right? I wouldn't look at it as leaving your old life behind if that looms too large. Not all of you is being left behind. Just the drinking part. You are still here with us and are a fully formed person with worth. You just don't drink anymore.
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Old 01-12-2020, 06:28 AM   #17 (permalink)
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I was in the same boat with the depression at around day 15. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and tune out the world. That lasted for about 5 days and thankfully has passed. Now Iím at the stage where im trying to figure out what to do with my new sober life. I have sooooo much time on my hands now and trying to relearn old hobbies and start new ones without the drinking has been a challenge. Itís getting better day by day but I know itís going to take time to reverse 20 years of alcoholic thinking. You can do this!
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Old 01-12-2020, 11:23 PM   #18 (permalink)
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I feel you SuperMario! I never drank til I was out of high school but in retrospect I can say I also had a problem pretty much the moment I began. Immediately I realized I didn't drink like 'normal people'.

The first few days are rough, and the first month can be disorienting. If you're like I was, ordering my entire life around drinking, then not drinking upsets the entire pattern of life. Please believe that it will eventually reorder into a much better pattern!
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I realized I could probably go on drinking like this for maybe two or three more years, or live for another two or three decades...but not both. Suddenly the choice became crystal clear.
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Old 01-14-2020, 08:06 PM   #19 (permalink)
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5 days in. Well, itís a start!

I am sleeping, but at very odd times, but right now Iím just taking it whenever it comes. Appetite very good, and drinking lots and lots of water (and tea - hey, Iím a Brit!).

Feeling very depressed at the moment, not sure what about really. I guess coming to terms with the fact that I have to leave my old life behind, as dramatic and turbulent and full of regret and remorse it was, itís the only life Iíve ever known. Iíve had an alcohol problem since my first sip at 15 so I really have no idea how to be a responsible adult, If that makes any sense? So I feel - burdened. Sorry to ramble, I guess I just feel transparency is more helpful than lies, and perhaps I can check back on this as I go and see progress. I hope, anyway.

Happy Sunday everyone
So happy to hear about your progress! Congratulations on day 5 and counting! I hope you continue to check in. What you write makes a lot of sense. When we were active alcoholics, we never matured into healthy adulthood and never developed healthy ways of dealing with life. Feeling sad is normal and totally OK. As you continue with sobriety, you will feel more and more confident in it and find your ways to build a new life. Life that will truly be your own and in which you will recognize yourself. ❤️
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Old 01-14-2020, 08:09 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Mario, you are almost to one week sober, and that is awesome! It isnít normal to feel the way you are in the early days.

What are some things you enjoy doing?
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