Zanna

9 January I should have had 3 years - but I messed up 17th Jan and I am messing up again right now,
DO NOT make the misakes I made and am making right now!
I am half way down a 70cls bottle of vodka and not planning to finish until it's gone - my excuse? Is totally rubbish -NO real excuse, just want to 'forget' but hell I'll wake up in the morning and think ' oh **** I posted that on SR' - I live in the countryside so can't get more in the morning but right now I'm being a prat - don't be a prat -don't be ME right now x

cantsleep123

you're half way through, so dump the other half. you know it's not helping.

Steely

I'm glad you posted Zanna, as would everyone here.

I drank after 5 years Zanna, and I'm now back on track.

Found I could only 'forget' for so long.

It's getting better Zanna.

It will for you too. ❤️

I know you're not going to ditch it. But tomorrow it'll be ditched in your mind and in your actions. Come back and join us.

ReadyAtLast

I echo what Steely said. I drank again after 3.5 years. Then said that was it, then did it again a few weeks later, then again etc till it became every night. i'm slowly but surely staying sober this time.

You can do it, there are loads of people on SR who had LT sobriety and picked up but now have LT sobriety again. Maybe pour the rest out, you won't regret pouring it out. Can you get some water and food and go to bed.

Hope you post tomorrow , we're all here for you.

Zanna

Thank you SO much xx and I really mean that xx
I

Zanna

I don't know wtf is going on in my head Steely but thanks for caring xxx

Foggyriver

I can totally relate to how you feel and what you are doing. I have an opportunity to drink tonight because I will be alone and free to do what I want. But it’s really not worth it. You can start again tomorrow and keep it going. Please try!

ShiftHappens

Zanna you so tried to help me when I fell to pieces!

Ok, fine whatever you screwed up but if I hadnt listened to the people here I wouldnt have made it or cared

Dont buy anymore

Stay here and lean on your friends for support!

Addendum : your avatar is transfixing lol its freaking me out

Dee74

Zanna
I think it's time to dump the rest and log off, get some rest.

You can come back from this. You had a long run. The only way you can lose what you learned then is to wilfully forget it.

You're smarter than that.

D

Dee74

I removed some posts.

Dee
Administrator
SR

Surrendered19

No way Zanna, don't be like that man!!! Stay with us here and let's get this figured out. I cannot tell from your post what put you off. I'm living in Day 47 for the first time in over 3 decades and I really get so much from veterans like you. I am new to this and need all the help I can get. Stay here.

Bonnefond87

Zanna I so feel for you. I drank after two years but I hated it more than ever. You sound like you're hating it too. I forgot how far it takes you down. Perhaps it sounds odd but the few months I have put together since have been even better than my first sober period. You can be free again.

Delilah1

Hi Zanna,

You can get sober again, you did a great job being sober for 3.5 years, that’s a long time. It starts again one day at a time. I hope you’ll choose to dump the vodka and start now. If not, everyone will still be here tomorrow.

Reid82

Hi Zanna,

Sorry to hear that you're drinking and yea I know the feeling, there's no way in hell I wasn't finishing the bottle off either. Relapses can be a great thing if we learn from them. Trust me, I had enough bad ones to finally throw in the towel last Summer.

You'll probably feel like **** in the morning, don't beat yourself over this, like I said, use it and more importantly learn from it , that's the key here. There's obviously some part of you that wants sobriety or otherwise you wouldn't be posting now?! I wish you the best.

Anna

Zanna, I hope you stop drinking and that you will feel better tomorrow.

We're here for you.

Steely

I don't know what's going on in my head either Zanna.

All that I know, is that drinking made 'things' in my head worse, and made any chance of working it all out impossible.

Seeing a therapist can help, if you get a good one.

I do care Zanna. I've been there too.

Let's be here together.

sugarbear1

I once had 3 years of sobriety in my 30's; then I was 50 and finally got sober about 8 years ago. Don't be like me, those years between 32 and 50 were full of misery.

Delilah1

Hi Zanna,

Just thinking about you tonight, and checking in to see how you’re doing. Looking forward to seeing you back on here tomorrow.

❤️ Delilah

Dee74

I hope you'll check in too - time to nip this well and truly in the bud Z.

D

Kaily

You can and WILL come back from this

Thank you for posting what is a realistic reminder of just how tenacious addiction is that we all need to remember.

Kind thoughts and support Zanna.