Mathematics

I'm not here to exactly recover, but I do want to quit drinking. I'm quitting drinking as a precursor since I feel I could hit a bad time in my life that causes me to drink more alone.

I started drinking when I was 22 or 23 myself or around there (didn't go out for my 21st birthday). I've been drinking for years myself as well and I've just hit my 30s in the last year or so.

I have had heavy times where I drank a bit heavy (maybe not binge drinking), but heavy as in multiple days in a row when I was in my 20s and such. I also drank every week or so to as well so it did fluctuate as well. I quit the hard drinking a few months before I even quit drinking roughly two months ago.

Tired, bored, and/or etc of drinking and I feel something traumatic in my life may or could plummet me into a spiral to drink a bit heavier again like I did in my mid 20s (3 days in a row or something like that - thursday, friday, and saturday). I don't know if that would happen, but I really don't want to risk anything myself.

I'm at 52 days (basically) myself. I know people go 10 years and such so this isn't that long of a time in comparison even though I know you shouldn't compare.

I don't crave (slightly at most - if I were bored or stressed), but my body definitely does feel better if just at times from stopping or I feel it's one less thing to worry about in case something bad, horrible and/or traumatic does happen in my life that would cause me to drink more and more.

I've quit drinking for now and want to push this for as long as I possibly can before something happens if it were to happen or something does happen.

Delilah1

Welcome to SR! 52 days is great, it keeps getting better.

MythOfSisyphus

That's a great start, Mathematics. See where that takes you and how you feel.

theVman31

Welcome Maths,
Good choice you have taken.
The thing about alcoholism is that it is progressive. If you have the slightest fear worry of drinking more and more it's probably better to do what you have done. Preventitive in a way rather than curative. Don't allow it to get it's grip on you. Well done on 52 days Keep posting 👍

AAPJ

You recognize that consuming alcohol is not a positive event in your life any more. You figured this out earlier than most of us. Congratulations.

Mathematics

Thank you for the replies.

I hear it time and time again or have heard it time and time again. Why don't people take preventive measures? I've been in classes to as well where people talk about this. Figure preventive measures in this situation or case was the best way to go plus I'm tired if not bored of drinking itself. I'm not from the U.K. myself, but January is no drinking month for some at least. I am trying to quit permanently though myself.

As I said above to the other poster. I've been in or sat in classes about this type of stuff before (one was due to a past job).

Preventive measures is the best way to go I figure. I don't want to run the risk of something happening if it were to happen.

Surrendered19

Just leave it behind Mathm. You are needlessly analyzing it like you mathematicians tend to do. You obviously know that your relationship with alcohol is not healthy, so that's that. Do yourself a favor at such a young age - leave it behind. You are wise beyond your years for doing it now. Simplicity lies ahead. Clear, calm and healthy and remembering your 30's and beyond.

August252015

Just what Vman said. I think all of us, if we look back honestly, see where the questions and doubts about our drinking started before we finally quit. It can get far worse than you can imagine. I've heard people say that if you are in doubt, quit for a year and see if it's easy - or NOT. Lots can go into that but a moving marker about our drinking habits is not a good sign for long term, safe drinking.

Glad you are here and seeking answers.

Dascha

Hi Mathematics!

I so wish I could hop in a time machine and have had the insight that you have now.
I didn't go out drinking on my 19th bday ( drinking age here) Never went to bars, clubs or pubs. I'd say compared to the general population, I hardly drank at all.

I'd maybe drink 5 or 6 times a year. But always to get drunk. I never bothered unless that was my intention, I didn't see the point of drinking otherwise. Looking back...that probably should have been a warning.

Somewhere around the time I turned 34 I got a bit isolated and depressed. I started drinking a bit at home to help me sleep and take away some anxiety I was having. Before I realized what I was doing...it was too late, I'd turned the corner. And I ended up becoming completely dependant on alcohol to function.

If someone had told me when I was 30 that a few years down the road I was going to be drinking all day everyday, ending up in detoxes, rehabs and irreversibly damaging my body, I never would have believed it. I'm 47 now and it has affected every aspect of my life. So much time and energy, lost relationships, broken promises, endless regret.

If you are aware of it now, and think it has the potential to be a problem for you, run...run as fast as you can away from it. Don't screw up like I did. Alcohol doesn't like to share, and it will own you...

SnazzyDresser

Greetings from a fellow math person.

The idea that these alcohol problems can be prevented with a rational understanding of the dangers ahead can be very appealing. And for some people, I'm sure this is enough to make them quit alcohol forever before things turn ugly. But for me and a lot of other people, the visceral appeal of alcohol's pleasant buzz has led us down a path where we end up feeling and acting very irrational indeed.

That's where the whole "rock bottom" idea comes in. Once alcohol as got its hooks into us, a lot of people need that type of stark life-defining choice to quit.

Mathematics, if you can now, in your early 30s, see clearly what's involved here, you will quit alcohol forever and be the better man for having done so. That's the ideal outcome here. All the best to you going forward.

cantsleep123

My wife and I have both agreed that never in our lives have we ever looked back on a day we didn't drink and thought "Man, I'm really sad that I didn't drink last night." However there have been many times we wished we stayed sober. I don't think there are any negatives whatsoever to giving up drinking permanently (other than how friends/family react but that's their problem).

Anna

You've made a good choice. If alcohol is causing any problems in your life, then stopping drinking is the answer.

HeadEast

I really can't add much to the excellent comments made above except to say congratulations. You won't regret this decision.

August252015

I'm just going to throw out something that I was told - sometimes the smartest people are the ones who never quit. We try to out-think, out-explain, sit-in-class the whole thing to death and that's just what the worst case scenario often becomes.

Finally FINALLY admitting I simply couldn't figure out my disease ( or don't call it a disease, I don't think it matters here) and had to stop was critical. THEN, I could understand some of the pieces of my specific puzzle that did contribute to my alcoholism.

And the amount of convincing we can do to ourselves, for a good while, and the rationalizations that our brains can come up with, don't serve us well.

Mathematics

Thanks for the replies.

Just to clear this up. I'm a mathematician type without a degree. I'm a mathematician (hobbyist) and I just enjoy the realm of mathematics myself. I spend a great deal of my time with math and some math I'm still pretty bad at while other math I do well in. It's mostly geometry, logic and/or etc though as I really do enjoy shapes, designs, and/or etc and such.

Day 53 now.

I'm in the realm of I can quit any time I want, but what you said is definitely right.

I still have to make sure I find the time to do stuff that is very appealing if not pleasant for that matter. I may not have it as hard as others, but I still have to make sure I sit down and find other stuff to do that will add enjoyment to my life without drinking.

Dee74

Hi and welcome mathematics

we have all kinds of drinkers here - if you think your life would be better without you drinking, you're in the right place

D

AAPJ

Hello Mathmatics,

It does appear that you are still in a situation where quitting alcohol is not difficult. As a math/data person here are a couple of thoughts that may be of some interest to you.

If one continues to drink alcohol on a regular basis over a period of time the statistical probability of being able to quit any time declines as ones brain chemistry changes to accommodate (and eventually desire) the constant presence of alcohol. How quickly this happens is based on a lot of variables. For example you did not start drinking until after age 21. That reduces your risk profile. Many of the folks who post here (like me) started drinking in their early teens which increases our alcohol risk factor significantly.

I remember the evening I attended an mandatory alcohol/drug lecture with my daughter back in 2013. This was required for all high school freshmen with at least one parent. As part of the presentation a PHD psychologist provided some recent research concerning brain development and age. The summary take away from the data she presented is that teen brains are not fully developed and teens who started using alcohol before their early 20s have a much greater risk of alcohol abuse problems over time and the younger one started the higher the risk.

When I left the meeting and was driving home with my daughter I thought to myself: Too bad none of this data was available to me in the 1970s. I started drinking at age 13. I'm screwed.

DriGuy

This is the problem. Drinking carries with it the risk of alcoholism. In addition, alcoholism carries the risk of organ destruction and death. So there are various degrees in risk within risk, enough to drive a mathematician batty.

There are so many variables that the various risks are impossible to calculate for any single person. The best we can come up with are some rather generalized statistical probabilities. As such, the probabilities are unlikely to mirror your personal profile.

I believe you are looking for black and white assurances of what your outcome will be. Unfortunately, they don't exist, and the decision on whether to drink or not falls back on you. This is not very helpful, but you can now enter with some understanding. You already had that, but apparently didn't think about it.

Most of us here entered the enterprise just assuming we would be OK on the grounds that we wanted to be OK. I think we knew there was risk, but were unprepared to seriously weigh the possible consequences. After all, being an alcoholic only happens to other people.